"One more push!" Anna yells at me. I've never sweat this much in my life, not even during initiation. My whole lower body aches and I feel like I have no energy left in me for one more push.
"I can't do it," I cry.
"Come on Soph, you can do it," Sam says from beside me.
"No, I can't," I wince in pain. Okay, I take that back. I just need this baby out of me. I squeeze his hand harder and squeeze my eyes shut. A tired, painful yell bursts out of my dry throat.
Suddenly, little baby cries fill my ears.
"You did it," Sam's voice makes me let out a relieved breath. His lips kiss my temple.
I look over to Eric's bed where he still lays there on life support. I convinced the nurses and doctors to keep him until our baby comes. I want them to at least meet each other once.
"Look," Sam says. He hands over my baby wrapped in a little blue blanket.
Tears come to my eyes just looking at him. "Hello there, little one," I whisper. I rub my finger across his cheek before lightly pressing a kiss to his forehead.
His eyes slowly blink open.
Steel.
Grey.
Eyes.
I smile at my newborn, "You have your father's eyes," he stares at me blankly. I lift my arm up more so that those little eyes could see the man in the bed next to me. "See him? That's your dad."
He starts to cry but I guess my new mother instincts kicked in because I coo him quietly to sleep.
I look up to Sam who's sitting at the edge of my bed, smiling and watching closely.
"You wanna hold him?" I ask.
"Yeah," he smiles. I hand him over carefully. "Hey little guy," he whispers. We haven't really picked out a name yet. Both Sam and I want something strong and meaningful. I already told him I wanted his middle name to be Matthew, just like Eric's. And we discussed that his last name would be Coulter. It only made sense since it is Eric's son.
"He's so cute," Sam looks up at me with a big smile. If you ask me, I would say Sam had glossy eyes from joyful tears he's choking back on.
I smile softly at the two. I know Sam is going to be a great father and husband.
Yup. That's right. He proposed last month in a very nontraditional way. Not that any other way I was proposed to was traditional.
~~Flashback to 1 month ago~~
We were just chillin on his bed late at night talking about the baby when he blurts out, "If we are going to raise this child together, why don't we just get married?"
I looked at him baffled. I guess I never really thought about it. I mean in my head I knew I'd just stick by his side but never really gave marriage any thought.
It did make sense though. I was practically living here. I only went back to Eric's apartment to go through all of Eric's stuff. I don't intend on getting rid of any of it or giving away his apartment. I plan on keeping it so that one day, our son can go through it and learn about his father.
"Yeah I guess," I shrugged.
He raises an eyebrow at me. "Yeah I guess?" He mocks me. "Don't sound too happy."
"No, I am. I'd love too," I pull him closer to me by the neck. "You didn't think I'd ask you to be my child's father and then marry someone else, did you?" A playful smile dances on my lips.
"Well, sometimes it's a guessing game with you," he smirks.
"I like to keep you on your toes."
"Mission accomplished," he closes the gap between us. His lips move with mine carefully.
~~End of Flashback~~
I lean my head back against the pillow. I'm too tired to move and too tired to think. I close my eyes just to rest. I've finally caught my breath after the 7 hours of excruciating labor.
"Sophia?" Anna's voice whispers from beside me.
"Hm?" I hum and snap my head up.
"Have you decided on a name yet?"
I look over at Sam who also shrugs and shakes his head. "No not yet," I tell her.
"Okay, that's alright. I just need to take him for about an hour or so, so we can do some testing and the basic measurements for him."
"Alright," I nod. Sam hands him over to Anna who smiles at us.
"Thank you," I squeeze Sam's hand.
"I didn't do any of it," he chuckles at me.
"No I mean for helping me through it all. I know it wasn't easy at times," I laugh.
"I'd go through it all again a million times for you," he kisses the top of my hand.
He's so sweet. He really knows how to put a smile on my face.
"Get some rest," he rubs my leg soothingly, "Is there anything I can do for you?"
"Can you get me some pizza?" I laugh.
"Of course," he laughs and rolls his eyes.
I watch him walk out. He's been good to me. He's been good for me. We've talked about being set up for each other and he's apologized many times for the decision he made. I've forgiven him. I wouldn't be able to live without Eric or Sam. I realized I couldn't just push him out of my life, especially after losing Eric. I know he regrets it and would do anything to take it back.
On the flip side, I've become very fond of him in a "boyfriend/husband" sort of way. This is a part of our life that we've never experienced before. We have grown together in the last 9-10 months. I've somehow gotten lucky enough to get a second chance at love.
~~
I'm finally released from the hospital with an 8 pound 1 ounce healthy newborn that is 19.6 inches long. Still no name, though.
I myself decided that tonight, I'd be letting go of Eric. I have a baby now. Unfortunately, life is going to be too hectic to try and spend time with Eric. So I think now would be the best time to do it.
Sam agreed that now is probably best. He and the baby will be coming with me, it only seems right.
Even though I've been released today, I'm not going home until tonight, after Eric is really gone.
I stare at Eric, admiring his perfectly shaped face. I miss his body and his smile. I remember that night we sat on the bridge and he told me about Natalia and I told him about my dad.
I think in that moment I knew I was in for some trouble but I was going to love him anyway. I asked for help as much as I could in training even though I never needed it. I just loved the way he skimmed his hand across mine when he would show me how to do something.
He always knew how to make me smile. There were some things he did in particular that he didn't even know had my heart pounding in my chest.
Like when he looked at me and his eyes would soften. My heart melts knowing I'm one of very very few that could do that.
And when he gave me his family ring that night in the hospital. It was a rough night for the both of us but we made it through. Now I wear that ring on a chain around my neck.
I reach up and grab the ring and twirl it in my fingers. With my other hand, I reach over and grab his.
That day when I kissed him while I was with Four I knew I had let him back into my life. I instantly knew I never stopped loving him.
And then we made love to each other for the first time. It may not have been both of our first times but it was the best. I didn't know that it would be our last time when we were on the bridge I would do anything to do it one more time.
I would do anything to have him back.
I sat there for hours just stroking his face and hair. I leaned over every so often to place a kiss on his face or hands. I trace over his tattoos at least 15 times until I have them memorized like the back of my hand.
The stubble that he used to have has grown a little bit more than usual.
"You ready?" The nurse asks walking up with Sam holding the baby close by.
I whip my head to the clock. It's already 8:45!
"No," I shake my head, coming to a cry. "But let's do it."
I cover my mouth as I cry. The nurse starts to fumble with the machine. "You just give me the 'okay', honey," she says.
I grip onto Eric's hands tightly. I can't let go now. My cries got ugly real quick.
Sam wraps an arm around my shoulders and squeezes tightly but releases me as I lean forward to place a shaky kiss on Eric's lips. Some of my tears drip onto his cheeks.
How much I would give for him to just grab my face and kiss me right now is unbelievable.
"I love you, Eric. I always have and I always will," I cry into his chest. I grip his shoulder with my right hand since my left still holds his hand. My body is thrown halfway across his.
I pull back ever so slightly to get one last look at his face. "Okay," I cry with a nod. I squeeze Eric's hand in mine again. My right hand moves from his shoulder to over his heart where I can feel it beating. "Do it."
Everything around me stops as the machine noises get quietter. My walls come crashing down as his heartbeat stops. My breath hitches in my throat at how real this has become. "No!" I cry out. My cries got louder and more blood curling. "Eric!"
I smashed my lips to his, hoping he'd be strong enough to come back without the machines but nothing happened.
My heart pounds in my chest so hard that it hurts.
After a long time of laying with my face in his chest, my crying eased up and I lifted my head to look around. Everyone is gone.
I peek at the clock to see it's 10:05. I wonder when everyone decided to leave. I bet Sam took the baby out because my screams were too loud.
I sit back in my chair and stroke his face and hair like I did before. I sniffed back any tears that threatened to spill. As much as I want to cry right now, Eric wouldn't want me to. He'd say "Come on Sophia, don't cry. I'm not worth it."
He's wrong. He is worth it. But I have to put my brave face on for him. I would hate for him to see me like this.
11:30 rolls around and I start to worry about our son. That is the one and only thing that forces me away from Eric. It kills me to walk away from him. I place my last kiss on his lips with only one tear escapee.
I turn my back on him to make it easier to leave, but that only makes me cry again.
I stumble through the doorway and into the waiting room where Sam stands quickly from his seat.
I cover my mouth as I walk right into his body for him to hold onto.
"He's gone," I whisper.
"I'm sorry Sophia," he whispers back.
We stand there for a handful of minutes until I gain the strength to step back and peer down at my sleeping son in the baby carriage.
"How has he been?" I ask changing the subject.
"Very sleepy," Sam chuckles.
We headed home for the start of many sleepless nights and tired days.
Hello sweathearts!! This is the last official chapter. So sorry that's it's very short but I didn't want to force anything else or babble on about random stuff. I cried a little bit while writing this, the image in my head was so rough and real. I hope you guys appreciate this as there will be one last part to the story, the epilogue. Please continue to vote, comment, and share. Thanks!