Jimin ran, but he didn't care if his lungs would give out. He didn't know why he was running, but he thought that maybe it was because he saw Jungkook smiling like that, and he knew he wasn't the reason behind that smile.
Maybe he felt hurt because Jungkook was with someone else, maybe he felt selfish and just wanted Jungkook to smile at him.
Maybe he was afraid that it was only Jungkook who understood him, and now he was being taken from him and Jimin would be alone again, he didn't know, really.
He had no right to say Jungkook was his, but being friends with him for so long, spending time with him for years, sharing so much memories with him made his heart clench because deep inside, he was hurt. At times, looking at Jungkook would give him mixed emotions. He'd want to cry because Jungkook would never be there for him forever, would never feel the same way as him, would never need him the way Jimin needed him. One of the reasons why he also wanted to cry was because Jungkook was wonderful and beautiful, and it's always been like that; he was too precious that Jimin thought he didn't deserve Jungkook's smiles whenever both of them were alone, whenever Jungkook would laugh at his jokes.
"Jimin hyung!"
There it was again.
Hyung.
He'll forever be that hyung Jungkook would go to when he needs help. Always that hyung who would take care of him.
Always that person who's forever branded as 'hyung' and nothing else.
He was just a hyung to Jungkook.
Jimin turned in a corner and just when he thought he lost that voice that's been echoing in his mind, he was being pulled in a room, a dark room that all he could hear was his breath, that all he could feel was his chest being pushed up against someone else's chest, so broad, so warm, just like his breath reaching Jimin's lips, his neck, and Jimin couldn't contain his panting and his heartbeat fastening. The hand that was wrapped around his wrist travelled down to his waist, and the other hand went up to Jimin's neck, and Jimin felt like his heart would explode.
"Why are you always running away from me?"
Jimin couldn't see who it was, but by listening to his voice, he knew, and he didn't need anyone to tell him.
Those long fingers that brought him closer made Jimin let out a small groan in the dark as he placed a hand on that person's chest to separate them, even only a bit.
"Jimin hyung, you shouldn't run away from me, please," Jungkook begged once again, and Jimin couldn't help but think how many times Jungkook has to beg whenever he's with him, and he couldn't stop the guilt that was now rushing through him. As Jungkook's breath hit Jimin's face, Jimin closed his eyes, letting the tears stream down his face one by one. He shook his head, letting out with a silent whisper, "You're happy with someone else. You won't be here for me forever."
"What?"
Hearing Jungkook's voice break made Jimin's heart break as well; it was shattering, and he felt like a fool for hurting Jungkook this way.
"What's that supposed to mean? Is it because of Taehyung hyung?" Jungkook asked with shock and worry in his voice that Jimin couldn't take it. Jimin didn't want to admit it. Taehyung was his friend, and he was like a brother to him, but he couldn't stand seeing Jungkook being taken away from him. It just pained him how alone he was and how it was only Jungkook who understood him.
Whenever he'd be the only one at home, Jimin would look up at his ceiling and think to himself why it was only Jungkook who would take the time to run and chase after him, why it was only him who would stand up for him in front of everyone when no one had the guts to, why it was Jungkook who was always there when he couldn't speak up.
Why it was only Jungkook who was his voice when words wouldn't come out.
Jungkook was his voice.
"It's not about him," Jimin lied, but the younger one knew better and tilted his face up, his fingers on his chin as he made sure Jimin knew he wasn't looking at anything else but him, wasn't looking at anyone else but him - only Jimin. Jungkook's eyes held Jimin there, made him keep quiet, made him stand still, his body so small under Jungkook's. "I just think you're closer...I just think you love him more than you love me," Jimin whispered, hesistant because of the word 'love' inserted there, but even though he somehow didn't want Jungkook to hear those words, he let those words that he's been keeping inside, slip, just like that. It took him three seconds to do it, and in those three seconds, his heartbeat increased even more that he knew Jungkook would hear it, but it was too late to run and hide again.
He wanted to be loved, appreciated, he wanted to feel special.
"More than I love you?" Jungkook said, making sure to say it low and slow, the feeling similar to wind caressing your skin, and Jimin just froze and let himself shudder under him. How beautiful Jungkook's eyes were, how close his face was that Jimin wanted to step back, but the cold wall behind him was the only barrier between him and the world outside of that tiny room they were in.
"Yeah..." Jimin muttered, and he regretted being here in the first place because Jungkook's face was only inches away that Jimin's chest was heaving. He had to push him back with his hand on Jungkook's chest once again, whispering, "Jungkook...too close, you're too close."
"But don't you want this?" the younger one whispered back, and Jimin just had to look at Jungkook's eyes again before he felt Jungkook kiss his left cheek, and Jimin's breath hitched. "I love you, and you know this," Jungkook continued to say, and Jimin wouldn't have heard it if it weren't for Jungkook's lips on his earlobe, Jungkook peppering him with sweet kisses that Jimin just wanted to scream internally. He swallowed the lump in his throat before he closed his eyes, taking in the feeling of Jungkook's soft lips on his cheek again. He didn't know how his fingers were latched onto Jungkook's shirt, but maybe he just liked how this felt, how much he wanted Jungkook this close that he thought he was going crazy. "Didn't I tell you that I want to stay with you? That you shouldn't run away from me anymore?" He looked at Jimin with gentle eyes and Jimin wasn't aware tears were already on his cheeks, staining them, and Jungkook just had to kiss his tears away.
"I don't know if you know how I feel towards you," Jimin said before Jungkook shushed him, shaking his head as if he didn't want to hear it. He was scared that Jimin would say he didn't want this, didn't want him, so Jungkook just pleaded for him to stay silent, bringing his thumb to wipe the tears that were on Jimin's cheeks.
"Don't tell me. Not yet. Not now," the younger one said before he kissed Jimin's other cheek, making sure to pay attention to them as well, and Jimin couldn't help but smile. "Tell me when you're ready."
The moment he felt Jungkook's lips on his forehead, he knew he felt safe. He knew where he wanted to stay.
"Don't think about anything, just stay still and let me hug you," Jungkook smiled as Jimin was trapped in his arms, and it felt right.
Jimin liked the darkness for once. He liked how Jungkook didn't see him cry even though the only light they had was from outside, but it wasn't enough, so Jungkook didn't see him cry, but he felt it.
"Don't compare yourself to others. You're you, and I love the you I knew years ago, the you you are today, I don't want you to change, okay?" he continued, and Jimin nodded like a baby despite the fact that he was still drowning in Jungkook's hugs. "Now please smile because I love it when you do. I love it when you smile."
Those words sounded so familiar that Jimin just had to pause for a second.
He looked up to feel Jungkook's face.
"Cutie, you like it when I smile?" he grinned in the dark, but he could feel Jungkook laugh because he was still in Jungkook's embrace, so close, so warm, it just felt like he wouldn't change it for anything.
The moment he felt Jungkook nod, he reached down to hold Jungkook's hands, feeling his fingers intertwined with his.
"So much," Jungkook leaned down just to kiss the top of Jimin's head, before he let Jimin forget everything for the next 20 minutes because he didn't want to go out, didn't let Jimin escape from his embrace because according to Jungkook, Jimin was his for that day.
---
Author's note (I had to put the previous I'M BACK chapter as the Author's Note here because I felt like it would be better if I made this a chapter instead ^^):
Hello, guys! I have good news...
I'M BACK!
I finished my exams and my school year is over! I took 19 exams and I studied so hard, and it just makes me so happy that I finished all those exams and now I can finally take a rest and just relax and spend more time with my family. I just want to spend time with my parents and my siblings because seriously, I just...I mean, I think school's been making me so stressed and I think it's taking away precious time which is supposed to be spent hanging out with our families, you know...I'm sorry if I sound like I'm rambling but I just had to let this out. I've been so down and I haven't been getting enough sleep for two months, I just had to study and take things little by little before I came back. Now I'm finally here, here with you guys :')
Do you know how much I missed you?
I've been missing you so much, it's crazy!
I hope you've been waiting for me, and I'm sorry if it took me a while to come back. I apologize. I hope I didn't let you down. Don't worry, I'm back.
I won't give up on this story and I won't leave you hanging. I've got the next chapter up, so don't you worry~ Haha! I'll post it up soon! Just wait~ I just had to update you before midnight comes!
Now that school's over, I can update more! Thank you for waiting for me patiently and for leaving comments and upvotes even though I haven't been that active, and as always, THANK YOU FOR SENDING ME MESSAGES! They make me so happy that sometimes, I cry.
I hope you've been eating and resting well~ I just want you all to have fun and smile! Don't forget to smile! Stay happy! I'm just a message away, okay? :')
I love you.
Once again, I'm back.
Much love,
Jammie
❤