HARPER
I hated not being able to touch him.
I hated seeing him less than two metres away from me and not being able to hug him tight and kiss him.
It was one of the worst things ever.
"So, I was thinking bridesmaids can wear fuchsia dresses?" Trish smiled.
"Dear, God, no" Mrs. MCGuinnes scoffed looking at Trish as if she had grown two heads, "Fuchsia, really?"
My eyes widened and I quickly looked away before realizing I wasn't the only one feeling awkward.
Talia, Elliot, Mrs. Mcguinnes, and Mrs. Fuller, had brought up the rest of Trish's 'Wedding Crew' save for her four other bridesmaids and Seth's two other groomsmen, besides Ethan, Chandler, and Andrew.
From the beginning of the meeting, it had been Trish trying to get her point across and her mother completely shutting it down with absolutely no remorse. She was worse than I had expected.
"How about emerald?" Mrs. Mcguinnes cheered gleefully, "It's the same colour as your eyes"
"My eyes are brown" Trish deadpanned not hiding her annoyance, "When have my eyes ever been emerald....Emerald is YOUR favourite colour"
Mrs. Mcguinnes tsked, "And for good reason"
I tried to tune Trish and her mother out and, instead, stared at Seth's mother who looked like she had just stepped off a runway.
She was wearing this gorgeous strappy blue dress that was both sexy and endearing and her dark hair was expertly framing her face in soft curls.
Mrs. Fuller pursed her lips, "Rachel, you've already gotten married~"
"And look at how that marriage turned out" Mrs. Mcguinness grunted with a sour look before harrumphing off into the kitchen, "Excuse me for not wanting that for my own daughter"
Trish let out a frustrated sigh as her mother began clanging about and turned to Seth, "Thanks for having your mom stand up for me...God knows you can't be a man and do it"
"What did I do?" Seth cried putting his hands up in surrender, "I can't go around yelling at your mother...she's your mother"
"And your a wuss" Trish snapped rubbing her stomach and sitting down next to Talia, "I can't believe you'd let me endure something like that"
Seth widened his eyes, "But thats YOUR mom!"
Mrs. Fuller let out a small smile at her sons absolute confusion before looking to Andrew, "I never asked how your father was"
"Oh" Andrew murmured putting his phone away, "He's...well, he's doing fine"
Although I didn't know much, I did know that there was something going on between Seth's mother and her brother, Andrew's father, and that was why they still hadn't seen each other besides the night of the gala. I figured she was still angry that her own brother had up and disappeared, in the form of jail obviously, because of his own greed despite knowing he had two children to consider.
"Tell him I send my regards~"
"Why don't you tell him yourself aunt Mona?" Andrew sighed rubbing the back of his neck, "He keeps asking for you and~"
Mrs. Fuller quickly stood up from her seat and smoothed out her dress, "Andrew, for all the years that you were angry with your father, I never once tried to tell you how to act or feel. So, I would appreciate it if you didn't try to act as if the moment you became all buddy buddy with him was all of our cue to do so as well"
"I didn't mean it like that" Andrew murmured looking away from her, "It's just that~"
"Your not the only one whose feelings mean something" She snapped, "I love my brother more than anything but I can't welcome somebody into my life who could up and leave it just as quickly for the sake of his own greediness"
With that, she hastily went to the kitchen to join Mrs. Mcguinnes in her harrumphing and I raised my eyebrows, "There's the Gold temper, huh?"
"That's my mom your talking about" Seth deadpanned before grinning, "They're all a bunch of Dr. Phil cases"
Ethan made a face, "I hope you know that you've got the Gold blood in you too...that's kind of what happens when two people~"
"I know how DNA works, Ethan" Seth muttered playing with a coaster, "It was a joke purely meant for entertainment purposes"
"Speaking of entertainment" Talia smirked turning to me, "Why are you and old Gold sitting on opposite ends of the room?"
I sucked in a breath at her flippant tone, "Did he sleep with your best friend? I hear that isn't too far from reality for you, huh?"
"Talia" Seth grunted giving her a slight shake of his head, "That's none of your business nor is it a topic of discussion"
Talia rolled her eyes, "Come on, I like Harper...it was just a friendly~"
"She's got enough friends" Chandler muttered taking a sip of his water and staring at her the entire time, "Thanks"
"I guess it's the Mcguinness' against all today, huh?" Talia scoffed sitting back into her chair.
"Harper broke up with me" Andrew said warranting shocked looks from everyone.
What the heck was he doing?
Talia's brows rose, "Did she now?"
Andrew nodded with a bitter shrug.
Gritting my jaw, I automatically began to grab my bag hoping to hightail it out of there. I didn't need this.
Not now.
Steeling myself, I quickly pushed myself through the front door as a deep voice stopped me, "Where are you going?"
I rolled my eyes as Ethan stood staring at me and softly shut the door closed behind him. I took a deep breath and stared at the ground, away from his worried brown eyes.
"Anywhere but here" I murmured fingering the strap of my bag, "I'd rather not deal with awkwardness today"
Ethan nodded slightly before running a hand through his wavy brown hair, "What would make it awkward? The fact that you ripped Andrew's heart or something else?"
"I beg your pardon?" I muttered furrowing my eyebrows as Ethan looked away.
Ethan stared at me for along moment before pursing his lips, "you and Andrew fight more than anybody I know...but you love each other more too"
"He had me followed, Ethan~"
"For shits sake, Harper" Ethan snapped with frustration, "Would you stop selling that sad story to everyone? We all know you didn't break up with Andrew for...for being Andrew; you knew who he was before you started dating and, in an alternate universe, I don't doubt you would have done the same thing. So...what happened?"
I shook my head slightly, "Don't talk about things that you don't know, Ethan"
"Harper, please" Ethan whispered taking a step towards me, "He's a mess. I can't watch as my best friend self destructs"
"What do you mean?" I murmured watching Ethan's sad eyes.
"It's like, when you broke up with him, you took everything that made Andrew, Andrew, with you. He can't even sit at home anymore because it sends him into a stupor and the only other place he ever goes is his fathers place...and he always seems to be worse when he comes back"
"Why are you even vouching for him? I know your only trying to deflect from the issues you and Kyle are having" noticing his confused stare I shrugged, "Yeah, Kyle keeps me in the loop"
Ethan looked like he was about to say something but thought the better of it before his eyes softened, "Harper, please"
I stoood for what felt like a century before sighing, "Ethan, I trust you"
He nodded and watched me expectantlty as I spoke, "And I trust that you'll leave well enough alone and stop digging into this"
With that, I turned on my heel, leaving an astonished Ethan in my wake.
The drive back to my place was full of me wondering whether I was doing the right thing or not and every single time the thought floated into my mind, I saw Mr. Gold's deep eyes telling me I was helping Andrew by doing this.
If this was 'helping' I hated to see his idea of punishment.
"What do you guys want?" I grumbled opening the door to my apartment and noticing two pairs of identical vans in the hallway, "You guys have homes, use them"
Throwing my shoes off, I slumped into the living room to find both Sean and Jude strewn across my couches, staring at me expectantly.
"Why does everyone look at me like they want something?" I snapped giving them matching glares, "First Ethan and now you guys"
Jude furrowed his eyebrows before understanding dawned on him, "I take it you haven't told anyone about the bold Gold?"
"Bold Gold?" Sean grunted, "I like Cold Gold, better"
Jude shook his head, "Trust me, bold makes you think, cold is far too generic; like, fine, he's out of tune with his people skills BUT~"
"Can you guys shut up?" I snapped dropping into the couch Jude was laying on, "They both sound like pretzels to me"
"Those are 'Rolled Gold'" Sean rolled his eyes, "everyone knows that"
I gritted my jaw and took a deep breath, "How do you tell somebody that they've got a horrible father?"
Jude gave me a sad smile, "I could tell you that you've got a horrible mother but I can't...because you don't"
I furrowed my eyebrows and Sean cleared his throat, "What makes somebody a horrible anything is not giving a shit. I would be a horrible friend for having seen my friend in pain and choosing to do nothing about it. Jude could be a horrible brother for watching you fall down the stairs and saying nothing, not even making fun of you. When people do things, its to show that they care, no matter how unconventional"
"Yeah, so when Dana did all she did, she was doing what she thought was right. When I laugh at you for tripping on the sidewalk, its because I love you and I'll be damned before I help you up because I know you'll milk it...Andrew's dad is doing what he knows, manipulating, in order to get close to his son....he's doing it all for his son, albeit completely screwing that same son over. I think he just wants to be a good dad"
"Yeah well he's a terrible human being" I choked as tears threatened.
Jude sat up and opened his arms, which I gladly fell into, "That, he definitely is"
"In slightly happier news, my dads divorcing Rachel...yay" Sean threw his hands up with a grin and I furrowed my brows.
"I thought they were on your dads bachelor party thingy cruise?" I murmured sitting straight.
Sean shrugged, "Apparently Rachel wasn't completely honest with my dad about her past ventures...like her totally having slept with three of my dads colleagues"
"Your kidding"
Sean shook his head, "My dad was mortified...and what does an old rich guy love more than his money? His pride, so he cut Rachel loose. My guess is that he'll go for another wannabe snob"
"Or maybe he'll go for someone else " Jude guffawed and in a moment I would never soon forget, Sean turned white.
He looked to Jude, "That's not funny"
"Am I missing something?" I asked as my smile slowly disappeared.
"Only that it sucks to suck" Jude shrugged giving Sean a light smack across the head, erasing whatever akwardness was about to ensue.
I couldn't help the laughter that bubbled up as they began cackling maniacally and I only stopped when I felt my phone buzz.
"Pick it up" Jude murmured having felt the vibration.
I only shook my head and pressed the 'off' button, knowing exactly who it was and exactly what they wanted.
~
The next morning, I awoke to Jude's catastrophic snoring.
I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and registered that I was neatly tucked into my bed. I honestly didn't even remember ever even getting up off the couch.
The last thing I remembered was Sean and Jude playing rock paper scissors over which movie to watch on Netlflix, the hangover won, and me slowly shutting my eyes as Bradley Cooper's blue eyes filled my senses.
Swinging my feet off the edge of the bed, I slowly padded into the living room and grinned at the way Jude was lying comfortable across the couch, with one sock on and the other probably past oblivion.
"He looks crazy" the deep voice made me jump and I cursed Sean as he came out of the kitchen, a bottle of water in hand, "Did I scare you?"
"Would it kill you to make noise while you walk?" I snapped as he rubbed his chest and shrugged.
"I'll keep that in mind the next time I walk" Sean rolled his eyes and stomped over to the couch Jude was laying on, gave me a look, and proceeded to completely toss Jude over the side.
"I'm up! I'm up!" Jude shouted jumping off the floor and forcing his eyes open.
Sean grinned, "Get your shoes, we've gotta go"
"Go where?" I murmured watching as Jude rubbed the back of his head sadly.
"A couple amateurs challenged Jude to a skate off and we have to go get him a fresh set of wheels so he can put em in a coffin"
I made a face, "I don't really like that analogy"
"And I don't like the color of your toenails. You can't win em all" Sean shrugged tossing Jude his sweater as he bustled to the bathroom.
"Speaking of which, I think Andrew may have not gotten the message"
My eyes darted to Sean's and I raised my eyebrows, "What are you talking about?"
"There's a black car parked outside the building and I'm almost certain it's Seth's" Sean murmured, "The plates even said 'Man-kenzie"
"He has Seth staking you out, now?" Jude laughed from the bathroom, "that family's full of bizarre people"
I licked my dry lips and gritted my jaw, "I don't think it's Seth"
Sean gave me a confused look as I made a beeline for the front door and slammed it shut.
I was going to kill Ethan.
~
I ran, at top speed, towards the infamous black car and practically shattered the glass with the way I began to knock on the glass.
"Chill out" I heard the deep grunt and stood back as the window rolled down.
Noticing my look of pure venom, Ethan gave me a childish grin, "Top of the morning to you"
"Did you sleep out here?! What kind of person sleeps outside of someones home like that?" I snapped, "Are you actually crazy? Do you need to be admitted into a psychiatric institute, Ethan? What is your issue?"
"You asked me a lot of questions, just then, so did you want me to answer them or were they rhetorical?" he murmured looking slightly perplexed, "Because I've forgotten the first two questions and~"
"Get out of the car" I ground out and he quickly did as told.
Once he was standing in front of me, I did what my mother always told me to do whenever a boy thought he had your best interest in mind.
I stepped on his toe.
"OW, Harper!" Ethan shrieked jumping and caressing his toe, "What the hell?"
Fine, my mother only ever told me to step on a boys toe if he was pressuring me into doing something I didn't want to do but I figured the advice still held in this case.
"Did me stepping on your toe, put some common sense back into your head?"
Ethan shrugged with a grimace, "How would you stepping on my toe, possibly do that?"
Readying my foot for his other toe, he quickly jumped back, "I'm sorry. Sorry. I'll shut up"
I crossed my arms over my chest, already feeling badly for what I had done and took a deep breath. As annoying as it was to know that Ethan couldn't take no for an answer, it honestly just picked at my need to out Mr. Gold for what he was really trying to do.
So I told Ethan.
"Your kidding...right?"Ethan gasped, "Wait, Trent was okay with this? You're okay with this? How is anyone okay with this?"
"Ethan, of course Im not okay with this but I'm not going to jump in and force Andrew to choose who he would rather live without...I'm afraid of who he would choose" I sighed sucking in a breath at the realization.
Knowing that Andrew could, either, go ahead and say he loved me too much to let his family be apart of his life, especially given what they were trying to do, or tell me he loved them too much to see me ruin anything for him, would absolutely destroy me. Regardless of whether a part of me wanted him to choose the first or the second.
It still sucked.
Ethan stared at me for what felt like a million years before finally shaking his head, "This isn't okay Harper, secrets don't last for long with this lot and Andrew will resent you for ever trying to make a decision like this for him"
"I'm not making any decisions for him" I hissed, "I'm removing myself so he doesn't have to"
Ethan tsked and combed a hand through his brown hair which, I noticed, was getting darker due to the lack of sun, "I know you think your doing whats right but...I think your screwing him over. And that's not fair"
"Wait, what are you talking about?" As if everything was in slow motion, I watched as Ethan quickly jumped into his car and with an apologetic look, whipped his phone out, "ETHAN!"
Within seconds, he was hanging the phone up and I stood blinking.
"What did you do?" I murmured as he finally rolled the window down and watched me with sad brown eyes, "Your going to make me tell him, aren't you? You're going to be a little bi~"
"Don't go there with me, Harper" Ethan finally snapped, "I'm sorry for not being able to sit by while you let some jerk who hasn't been around for almost a decade, hurt you and Andrew...I'm sorry I can't be an insensitive prick like you hoped"
I Shook my head, "You don't get it Ethan, I honestly can't do it"
Before I could stop myself, I felt the tears gently slip, "I can't tell him that I chose myself"
"What?" Ethan whispered confused
"I chose me, Ethan...I chose Harper" I blubbered, "I was scared that if, yet again, someone was given the option of keeping me or letting me go, that they would chose to let me go...I was afraid that if anyone ever had that chance again, they would take it"
Understanding filled Ethan's eyes, "Dana"
"I love to act like I don't give a crap about her, about any of it, but I'm sorry to tell you that I think about her, about this entire thing, every single night" I hiccuped, "I think about the way she stared into my eyes, as an innocent child, and decided that I wasn't worth keeping around. I couldn't stand to know that somebody else, another person, chose to throw me away...God knows it's happened enough; first my biological mother, my best friend and boyfriend, and then my other parents who, when I asked if I could move to California, didn't even bat an eyelash or remotely try to coax me into staying"
"Harper, you have to know that none of that is true" Ethan muttered taking a step towards me and placing his hands on my shoulders, "I would never let you go"
I looked away from Ethan and he smiled, "Andrews at his dad's place right now, I'm meeting him there. Please, Harper, for both your sakes, we have to tell Andrew what's going on. I can tell it's eating you up inside"
"His dad could just deny it"
Ethan shook his head, "He can't be that much of a douchebag"
I inwardly brightened at Ethan's words because, of course, nobody could be that heartless...right?
Wrong.