After waiting for a while, I went back inside and started preparing dinner. I had a bag of rice and some chicken meat, so I decided to make chicken rice and gravy. While the rice is getting ready, I am already searing the chicken.
I went above and beyond to ensure that Colton would be satisfied with the home by completing each and every task on the list. Because of the danger it poses to my mental health, I can no longer risk making him angry.
Sometimes I find myself thinking about how I could be the ideal wife for Colton, or how well he takes care of me despite the fact that he asks very little of me. Other times, I reflect on how well he treats me.
What could possibly be wrong with my head?
I am making an effort to put up a fight, but there are times when I simply want to give up and let my body cure itself.
Maybe if I wasn't such a bad wife he would beat me less. Maybe if I did what I was supposed to do maybe he wouldn't beat me at all. Then we could have a happy marriage. Maybe he would beat me less if I did what I was supposed to do.
Oh!
I can't stay here any longer. Something is happening to my mind. I need to get the fuck out of here. My god, I have got to get the fuck out of here. I can feel myself becoming less of who I am, and I cannot allow that to happen.
While the dinner is cooking, I dash upstairs to the bathroom, open the cupboard there, and begin looking through it for some kind of sleep or meditation.
I fling open each and every one of the entrances, but I don't see anything at all, not even a single form of meditation; yet, they must have some, right?
Is it possible that he put me to sleep with something like that before snatching me and bringing me away from my home?
I quickly searched the entire second floor, including the closets and the second bedroom. I did not find anything.
And I find nothing, nothing at all, sighing loudly as I stood up from my knees after looking under the bed in the other bedroom, then I remembered that I hadn't checked beneath our bed!
It's unlikely that he'd hide anything like that under our bed, but there's always a chance.
I quickly say a prayer and then run into our bedroom, hoping that Colton isn't going to come inside just yet. I practically throw myself next to the bed, landing hard on my knees, and push my head under the bed when I see a box.
What the hell, is this it?
Am I, at long last, beginning to experience a modicum of good fortune?
I have to grab the box quickly and pull it out from under the bed. When I flip the lid open, I see that there are some medicine bottles inside.
I suddenly feel tears welling up in my eyes, and I raise a trembling hand to the box. I then begin to slowly but quickly look through the bottles, all the while swinging my head to the door to make sure that he hasn't sneaked up on me.
After reading the labels on each and every bottle for a few more minutes, I came across some nighttime sleeping tablets that would put him into a deep sleep. It is designed to allow your body to relax and stay asleep throughout the night, hence reducing the amount of times that you wake up coughing.
After taking two pills, I grip them firmly in my hand and shove the box under the bed in the same spot where he had it. I then start making my way back down the steps just as I hear the back door opening.
Just on time.