The next morning was harder to survive, actually. I lost count of how long we had sex, but I know we went to sleep almost close to dawn. Chaeyoung was simply amazing in every way, she is the type of person who is curious and learns very quickly when she wants to. It felt like a reflection of me.
Since it was after ten, I assumed that she wasn't worried at all about going to class today. Her alarm clock rang about four times already, and even then she wasn't up. I can no longer say the same about myself. I counted a few hours of sleep until the moment my father called me and I had to get out of bed to answer him, which was something new for me, because I usually only answer when it's convenient for me. Maybe I'm getting soft.
I picked up some clothes from the floor and went to the living room, so as not to wake Chaeyoung with our conversation. At first I was still a little hesitant about Akira, the events of last night, our quick conversation and my suspicions didn't let me move too far towards him without first taking some precautions. But he seemed worried about me, right away asking if I was better and if I was with Chaeyoung. I laughed to myself. Even though I didn't tell him anything, he already knew the intensity of what was going on between us, which was impressive given the fact that he deprived himself of this type of assessment about me many years ago.
Without me giving him a clue, the bastard put into words everything I felt for her. Even my insecurities and my fears. I don't know how many times I snorted on the line, indignant at him and, even more so, at myself for being so easily decipherable. It seems that the more I tried to change and leave him completely out of the loop, the more he noticed my masks and the reasons for each of them. I was beginning to realize that this was a meaningless effort. With the matter of Chaeyoung, also came all his support for us. Akira didn't mince words to say how beautiful we were together and how good we made each other, all these conclusions after just a few quick words.
I might go into my neurosis again if it weren't for the sincerity in the way he praised us. The way he seemed to make a point of convincing me of what he was saying made me remember the old times, times when he really cared about my happiness and well-being. Maybe people could change, or recover, after all, it was happening to me. But I had help from Chaeyoung and he... Well, I don't believe that my mother was any great difference in his days. I started thinking while listening to him and decided to give myself up this time.
We talked like never before. If it didn't last long, it was no less than an hour. We started with my relationship, my uncertainties, jealousy, Chaeyoung's parents. Akira even offered me help to face them when I was ready or if necessary. I distributed laughter to every corner of the apartment as the topics went from one to another, from the most comical to the most serious, until we arrived at Nayeon. Contrary to what I expected, the atmosphere between us did not change with the subject. My father gave me all the explanations and apologized even more for not having told me sooner.
The damage was already done, that was the truth, but I wouldn't deprive her of trying to be someone in this life, especially if she is really determined to change as she says. It wouldn't be a problem to see her working at his company, that's what I thought until I received an offer from him.
- You know I don't want to get involved in these things. - I stopped leaning on the kitchen counter. I've been going around the apartment while talking.
- I know, sweetheart, but you are the only person I trust with this and who I know is capable.
- What about Sachiko? - he sighed when he saw that I still didn't refer to my mother properly.
- You know she doesn't have the slightest ability to lead a company. - I snorted. He was right, but there was no way nobody was more qualified than me. More ideas for replacements came to my mind, but he was quick to beat me to it. - There is no one else I trust in this world, not even my partners.
- And what, exactly, would I have to do in these meetings?
- Well, you would be my named replacement, so all decision-making power would fall to you.
- Father! - I spread my free hand on the marble, lifting myself up as if I were staring at it in front of me. - How do you expect me to make decisions about something I don't even know about? What are you trying to do with this? Make me sink the company?
- Of course not - He laughed on the other side, making me even more indignant. - The banking decisions are already in my hands, you will just represent me. If you accept, I will send you the papers tonight so you can take a look, along with the analysis file for the cases to be discussed at the meeting. I promise that it won't be a big deal and that you won't have to say more than a yes or no.
- And why can't you be present? - I knew that for him to be asking me such a thing, there shouldn't be any other alternative, as he knows how much I hate the family business. But I needed a more convincing reason.
- Because I will be finalizing everything for the last week of the campaign, the elections are coming up. I have to go to Michigan tomorrow, but then I'll leave the jet with you.
- Wait, why the jet?
- The meetings are in Korea.
When I thought it couldn't get any worse, in addition to everything that was already expected of me, would I still have to go back there? Of course it couldn't be anything simple, what was I expecting from a Myoui's request.
- I know you're upset, but it's just for the weekend. On Sunday night you will be back if you want.
- And do I have a choice? - I spread my hand across my face, lightly rubbing the skin while slowly moving up to my hair.
- You will always have a choice, it’s me who doesn’t have one.
A subtle drama to finish decorating the cake. I sighed as loudly and disturbingly as I could and squeezed my eyes shut, sinking onto the counter in front of me.
- Is there anything else you need to tell me before I get on that plane? - I heard a sigh of celebration from the other side, but nothing too flashy. My father wouldn't give me that pleasant taste.
- The plane is programmed to explode as soon as it rises through the clouds.
- Very funny.
- One more thing, Mina. - he paused waiting for my attention, I just grunted for him to continue. - Nayeon will go with you, she will be your assistant.
- What? What the hell! - I raised my voice, but it was too late. The phone announced the end of the call, which almost made me smash my phone against the wall.
Of course it could get even worse. Was he the only person in the world who didn't realize how much I wanted to distance myself from her?
- Don't swear. - I got startled when I heard the voice behind me, then turned around, coming face to face with the funniest scene of my life. Chaeyoung was standing at the beginning of the hallway, one hand rubbing her eyes, her hair completely tangled, her face completely crumpled and her clothes crooked on her body. I tried to avoid it, but the laugh escaped my mouth, catching her attention, and she placed her incredibly small eyes in my direction. - Why are you laughing?
- You - I turned to face her, resting my back on the counter. - You look like a beggar.
- Your bad luck. - She made a disdainful face, sticking out her tongue and making my task of not laughing even more difficult. Chaeyoung, when she just woke up, was the funniest and most annoying person in the world. Rare were the moments when I caught her in a good mood in the morning.
- Did I wake you up?
- No, of course not! - she cut me off instantly as she slowly made her way to the kitchen behind me. - All those screams and blows didn't even pass my ears, in fact it was the lyrical song of the birds that woke me up.
Chaeyoung walked past me looking at me crookedly while I was just having fun. Her body was covered only by her underwear and her beloved flannel jacket. She took away all my sanity, and the best part was that she had no idea.
- What will you eat?
- Cereal - she grunted as she grabbed everything from the cupboards and spread it out on the counter. - We have to move quickly so as not to miss out on too much at college. Have you eaten?
- What? - I laughed quietly, not believing what I was hearing. Did she really intend to attend today's classes? - Do you know what time it is?
- For you to be up, it must be nine o'clock. - I laughed again, only this time without measuring the noise. Chaeyoung stopped what she was doing and turned to me. - What's wrong with you?
- Chaeng - I said, turning around the counter and heading towards her, still with a smile on my lips - It's already more than noon.
Her eyes immediately grew towards mine, making the situation even more comical. This was very funny to see precisely because it was never seen. Chaeyoung is the exemplary student type, she always got good grades and had a great relationship with her teachers. Everything I wasn't. Missing class wasn't a big deal to me, but to her it seemed like the end of the world. And the end of her world, in my eyes, was always fun.
Chaeyoung seemed to want to say something, but I assumed she was too overwhelmed to do so. She then tried to run to the bedroom, but I was faster and caught her by the waist halfway.
- Mina! Let me go, we have to go! - she screamed as she tried to free my arms from her body, without success.
- Chaeng, even if we leave right now, we won't be there in time to catch the last morning classes.
Chaeyoung insisted a little more, but soon dropped into my arms, letting out a sigh that determined her defeat. I leaned my body against one of the counters while she rested against me, her head resting on my shoulder.
- What time did you wake up? - she asked in the slyest voice in the world, almost making me feel guilty.
- I woke up it was almost nine.
- What?! - her voice changed to a much stronger tone and she turned in my arms, facing me while lightly hitting my arms. - Why didn't you wake me up?
- I thought that after last night you were a little more tired than usual. - Her face blushed immediately and her embarrassed expression made me laugh in an unexpected way. Was she really embarrassed that I mentioned our night?
- Why did you think that? - the voice was more muffled than ever, her face was now placed in my neck, but I could still notice the tone of discomfort.
- Because we lasted a long time yesterday and you spent a lot of energy doing all those things and positions... - Her hand came in a sharp slap on my arm again, making me laugh. - Hey!
- Shhh - she looked at me again, pressing her index finger against my mouth. - Let's not talk about that now. - her voice changed again, now low and stealthy.
- Why not? - I imitated as best I could and noticed her lips curve slightly.
- It makes me want to do it again. - I raised an eyebrow and gave her my best and most intense look, seeing her swallow dry in reaction.
- I'm not opposed to that. - I showed her my teeth, only having time to scratch her skin before she removed her finger from my lips.
- No, no, no. - She walked away from me walking to the other side of the kitchen. - Otherwise we'll stay here for the rest of the day and we can still take afternoon classes.
- Oh no, Chaeng!
- Wait, what were you doing all this time awake?
- I was talking to my father, he was the one who actually woke me up.
- Did something happen?
- Yes and no. - Her forehead furrowed as she watched me. - No, because it was nothing serious. Yes, because he asked me to represent him at some company meetings this weekend, while he will be away.
- Right...?
- But the meetings will be on Saturday in Korea, I have to go tomorrow. - My face contorted into a grimace at the same moment that hers was shaped in astonishment.
- What? Are you going to Korea? - I shook my head in confirmation.
- And worse, Nayeon is going to be my assistant.
- Are you kidding me?
- I wish I was.
- Was there no one else? Why you?
- No, for my father to come and ask me for something like that, he must be very desperate. It's not usual of him.
- Do you really need to go? - I looked at her with an almost hurt expression from across the kitchen and couldn't contain myself. I made my way to her, answering her gaze in the same fragile way and was welcomed by her arms that tightened around my neck.
- I need, love. I didn't want to, but I can't let him down. He looks really different and I decided to give him a real try.
It seemed like confirmation of my actions, but in reality it was the certainty I was looking for that what I was doing was the right thing and only Chaeyoung could give it to me. I felt my heart sink as her eyes alternated between mine, the slightly darkened and lifeless brown ones telling me how she would feel while I was gone.
- And Nayeon? - she broke the silence by bringing her body completely up to mine and using her fingers to caress the back of my neck.
- I'll try to avoid her as much as possible, I promise. I won't let myself get carried away...
- I trust you, I'm not worried.
Those few words took my breath away, and just not the floor, because her arms were holding me at the moment. I can't tell what went through my head when I heard her say she trusted me. This was the kind of thing I never expected to hear and never imagined myself deserving in life.
- So what's giving you that sad face? - I tried to hide it by remaining as impassive as I could. But I was really curious about the root of sadness that bloomed on her face there, it was heartbreaking.
Chaeyoung remained silent for a few seconds, head down. My eyes ran all over her body once again and my hands were busy with her hair, arranging the strands and the parting that had once existed there. She waited until I finished to look at me again.
- I can't explain it, but it feels like I'm saying goodbye to you.
- What? No, stop with it. - I held her face firmly between my hands, fixing my eyes on hers -It's only two days, Chaeng.
- I know, but I'm going to miss you.
- I'll call you when I can, or send you a message, or video... It doesn't matter.
- Promise?
- Promise.
She stood on tiptoe and hugged me tightly as if at that moment I was leaving. If this was a preview of what was to come tomorrow, I would have to prepare a lot more for what I thought would be no big deal. But these were things I would worry about tomorrow, today was the day to enjoy the most of it.
After a lot of effort, I managed to convince Chaeyoung that missing the rest of the classes wasn't so bad. It was like telling a child that Santa Claus doesn't exist after watching them wait for him all year.
We spent the whole day holed up in the apartment, I didn't even bother to get clothes for myself, I wore what Chaeyoung actually had and decided to spoil her as much as possible. I sat her at the counter while she prepared our lunch. Yes, I was making lunch. Chaeyoung didn't miss an opportunity to distract me, if she wasn't joking she was teasing, and with that I easily deviated from my goals. At one point the rice almost burned, because she insisted on biting her damn lip a thousand times and I couldn't resist
We ate straight from the pan, without ceremony, today was not the day for them. Between laughter and kisses, we made each other dirty and clung a lot. It was nothing new that it was difficult for Chaeyoung to stay away from me, she had always had this clingy attitude, and now that we were dating it was even more evident and, surprisingly, better. Not only did I love her that way, I also reciprocated with the same intensity. We were becoming one of those insufferable couples who only hang out together, like the same things together. Those couples that I hated and criticized so much were now a reference for my dating life. It would be tragic if it weren't comical.
Chaeyoung was the funniest person to live with, at least that's what I thought. The whole time we talked, laughed, played, enjoyed the silence, all in perfect harmony. But as the night approached, I saw happiness slipping away from her gaze. That small glow that was always there, now seemed to have been lost in the insecure immensity. While we were watching TV, I brought her close to me and held her there until I couldn't anymore. I wanted her to feel all my love and my suffering in those two days away, it wasn't that long and it shouldn't be that dramatic, but it was happening and it was horrible. I just wanted to hold her there and never let go.