september 11th, 2018
LITA
I WENT TO PICK UP ROSE FROM YOUR MOTHER. I WON'T BE LONG.
— LITA
I place the note on Scarlett's night stand, hoping that she'll notice it when she wakes up. I woke up to her phone ringing non-stop, but Scarlett was out cold. I wasn't surprised with the night she had... It was her mom, asking if she could drop off Rose because she had an appointment she couldn't miss. I told her I'd pick her up because I wanted to go get something for breakfast anyway.
I leave the room quietly, slip on my shoes and leave. I check the address Melina sent me, it's not too far. I guess that with Rose, the walk home will be longer, but I'm sure she'll be fine. Before I know it, I'm outside the building, waiting for the girls to come down. When they do, Melanie is almost dragging little Rose out. I can see a grumpy look on her face and something tells me she didn't like to be rushed out the door this morning.
"Hey Rose, good morning Miss Sloan." I go over and greet them. I watch the scene in front of me unfold as Rose wrestles to sit down on the wet pavement while Melanie struggles to keep her standing up.
"Call me Melanie, please... Uh, thank you so much for coming. Rosie, Lita is going to take you home okay? Grandma has to go. Be good. I love you, and I'll see you soon." She kisses Rose's forehead and walks away.
We watch Melanie leave and the minute her grandma turns at the corner of the street, Rose throws herself at me. She holds her arms up and, still not being able to say no to her, I pick her up immediately. She snuggles in my embrace and rests her head on my shoulder. I readjust my hold until we're both comfortable, and I set off to the nearest bakery I can find.
"So, here's what we're going to do. Your mom... She's hurt–" I start speaking, and at the mention of her mother being unwell, Rose immediately straightens up in my arms. Worry takes over her face, and I can see the fear in her eyes. I should've taken a different approach...
"She hurt her ankle last night, but she's okay, don't worry!" She immediately relaxes and lays her head back down on my shoulder. "So, we're going to buy her some things to make her feel better, and then we'll buy breakfast for all of us. How does that sound?"
"Good."
"How was school yesterday sweet girl?" And it's like a switch flips in her brain. She begins to tell me about everything from her mom dropping her off even though she didn't want to go to school, to drawings, to playing red light green light with her friends. She sings me the song that she learnt, however she already forgot half the words so I have to fill in from time to time.
"Do you think I can show mama my drawings later? They're all in my backpack!" She asks with the biggest smile on her face.
"Of course you can sweetheart."
When we arrive at the store, I decide it would be best to put her down. However, when I try to do so, she holds onto me tightly. Her arms go around my neck while her legs tighten around my torso. It takes a bit of efforts, and in the end I manage to get her off of me. She looks at me with the cutest out on her face and her arms crossed in front of her. She's trying to act mad, but she looks absolutely adorable.
Don't tell her that though.
"Hey, hey, hey... It won't last long, but I can't keep you in my arms while we're in the store. We can hold hands if you want." I offer her and hold my hand out. She takes it and drags me inside. For someone who didn't want to be put down, she sure is excited to go in now.
She looks around the aisle curiously. She doesn't say anything as I drag her around in hopes to find What I'm looking for. "What are we getting?" She questions.
"Well, her mom hurt her ankle, and she's having a little trouble walking so we're going to buy her a brace. Do you know what that is?" I hear a small no. I look down, and she's already looking up at me, clearly waiting for me to explain. "It's something people sometimes use when they're injured. It's used to protect her foot while it heals, and it's going to help your mom feel better."
"Can we get her a pink one?" Honestly, if I could, I would. It would make running these errands with me exciting for Rose, and it would make Scarlett's recovery a little more fun. But I look ahead at the options we have in front of us and all of them are black.
"They don't have any pink ones, sweet girl." I tell her, but her mind is already on something else.
"Can I get a toy?"
"Not today Rosie." She scoffs. I'm taken back. I'm not used to this kind of behaviour from her and I hope this won't lead to a tantrum. "Drop the attitude. You're four, not fourteen."
Luckily, she does. I'm not going to lie, I was scared she was going to have a fit in there. Rose has always been very well-behaved around me for the most part and I don't feel comfortable parenting Scarlett's kid when she's not there.
I pick up one of the braces and Rose and I head to check out in silence. It's a bit awkward and I don't really know how to act, it's never been like this between us before. Thank goodness there isn't anyone waiting at the register, now we don't have to wait. After all, it is a Tuesday morning and people are at work.
I should be at work...
"Thank you so much, have a nice day."
Rose and I walk out, but before I can pick her back up she stops me. She wants to carry the brace in her backpack, I instantly agree. She turns around and lets me open her bag, which looks massive on her. I stuff the brace in there and she looks at me with the proudest little smile on her face. "Now we can go!" She announces and starts to leave without me.
I run to catch up with her. It only makes her speed up a little, and if we weren't in New York City I would be playing with her. However , with cars and traffic, and people all around us, I don't feel comfortable joking around. I eventually grab her hand and I guide her through the streets of the city to our next stop.
We enter the bakery and the warmth of the place instantly hits us, as well as the smell of fresh baked goods. "What do you want Rose?"
"I can't see!" She whines, trying to get on her tiptoes. I hoist her up on my hip so she can get a better view and I give her a couple of minutes to decide. There's no one behind her so nobody is rushing us to make a decision, which I think Rose enjoys. I can see her going back and forth between the croissants on display and the madeleines. "Can we have three croissants please?"
"And we'll take two hot chocolates. Thanks." I add and take out my card to pay. It's hard as Rose refuses to let me go. Again.
As soon as we leave the store, Rose burns her tongue trying to drink the hot chocolate. The little one has no patience but maybe that'll teach her something.
"Wait!" Rose yells in my ear. I internally sigh, I'm not going to lie all I want to do is go back to Scarlett's. My arms are growing tired and we bought what I had on my list. "We're missing something! Flowers! We always get mama flowers!"
So, without any questions asked, I turn around and we make our way to the shop. It's a bit further away than I would have liked but what the girl wants the girl gets. The whole way there she tells me how she wants to get pink flowers before we couldn't get pink 'medicine' for Scarlett. I mean, I do have a bunch of pink flowers she can choose from. She occasionally takes sips of her hot chocolate, and now she has a cute little moustache. I finished mine a while ago, so I bet hers should be almost cold now, however she doesn't really seem bothered by it.
The closer we get to the shop, the more anxious I become. I haven't been back there since I closed last Friday, and I don't want anyone just lurking around trying to take a peek inside. I still haven't thought about what I want to do about this whole situation yet. I want Scarlett's advice. So far, I only got ELizabeth's input, telling me it'll die down eventually and everything will be okay. I figured as much but I still have this uneasy feeling that something will go wrong again.
In front of the shop stands a familiar figure that I could recognize anywhere. He has visited the store enough times that I now know when he enters the store just by the sounds of his footsteps against the floor. "George? What are you doing here?"
"I wasn't sure if you were open so I came down to check."
I put Rose down and fish in my bag for my keys. I unlock the door for the three of us and let George then Rose go in before I close behind us. "Well... we're not. But for you, I'll make an exception. Rose, darling, can you say hello to George?"
Rose hides behind my legs and offers a little wave. She's not usually this shy when meeting other people, but I let her hide anyway. My parents used to force me to socialize with people I barely knew and I hated it. Therefore, I will not force Rose to do the same.
"What can I get for you?" I ask him, while Rose tries to latch onto me like a koala. It's not gonna be easy but I can still do my job so I let her. George lets me pick for him, so Rose and I have a look around and I let her choose a small bouquet of carnations.
Wrapping the flowers is difficult with a child in my arms but I eventually manage to do something presentable and hand it off to George. "Lita? Can I do the money thing again?" I nod and whisper the price in her ear.
"That will be... I forgeted."
"Forgot, sweetheart." She repeats after me before asking for the price again. "He owes you ten dollars."
"That will be ten dollars please." She holds her hands out for the money and George places a bill in her hand. She hands it over to me and holds her hand out for the change except I don't have any to give her.
"He gave you a ten-dollar bill, so we don't owe him anything now. Now say thank you." I explain. I can tell it's a little bit difficult to grasp right now, but she trusts me enough to let the matter go for now and says thank you. We walk George out, and I lock the door behind him, that way I know no one will annoy us. I let Rose roam around the aisle while I sit on the corner. She brings me back every single pink flower she finds, which is starting to be quite a lot.
"Rose sweet girl, we have enough flowers now." I call her over. She reluctantly make her way back to me and hands me the last of the flowers she picked out. I let her pick some paper and a ribbon to tie everything together, and she has a cute little flower bouquet in her hand.
"How much do I owe you Lita?" She asks when I help her put her backpack on. It dangles from her shoulder but she looks so precious.
"Well, since you're my favourite costume, it's free." I tell her with a wink and she gasps. I put her on my shoulders and I carry her home. I try to hurry because we've been out long enough and even though Scarlett hasn't called or texted, if we stay out any longer she'll start to worry.
We manage to get home eventually. To help Rose get some energy out I race her up the stairs. I know how stupid this sounds, especially considering how Scarlett injured herself but at least I know now Rose won't jump on her mother the second she sees her.
The moment she hears the door unlock, Rose pushes the door open. She's too quick and I don't catch her unfortunately. "Rose! Don't run!" I say, loud enough for her to hear.
"Mommy! We're home!" I hear Rose scream. Unlike Rose, I take my time. I untie my shoes and slip them off my feet. I go to the kitchen and turn on the coffee machine and leave our pastries on the table before making my way to Scarlett's bedroom.
In the short amount of time they had together, Rose managed to find her way on Scarlett's back. She's facing away from the door, and upon hearing me enter the room, she buries herself further into Scarlett's chest. "Rose, what did I say you need to tell Lita?"
"I'm sorry for not listening when you said no running. I was just excited to see mommy. Can I show her what we got?" She asks. She doesn't wait for my answer and scrambles off the bed to get her backpack that she dropped in the middle of the hallway. She comes back running, but seeing our faces she stops and walks instead. I hoist her on the bed and we both take seats next to Scarlett. Rose looks through her bag and holds up the brace that we got before slowly handing it to her mother. "We got you a br... br..."
"A brace."
"We got you a brace for your foot but they didn't have any pink ones so I got you this instead!" She grabs the flower and gives it to her mother, shoving it a little bit in Scarlett's face.
"Aww sweetheart it's beautiful."
"I picked them all by myself!"
"You did such a great job! Looks like Lita has some competition, huh baby?" Scarlett comments, smirking. Rose enjoys the compliment and turns back around and sticks out her tongue. Naturally, I do the same and Scarlett mutters something about now having two children to take care of.
"How about we have breakfast in the living room? Rose, be a good girl and take the flowers to the living room while I help your mom. Then we can find a pretty vase, okay?"
The little blonde didn't need to be told twice before running off with the flower. Meanwhile, I carefully make my way arund Scarlet so I can help her put the brace on. I look through her drawers and throws herthe first pair of socks I see. I help her slid her sock over her right foot before unlacing and unfasten all velcro and loosen the adjustable lace enough to fit her foot inside the brace.
I help her slide her foot your foot into the boot part of the brace and check where the brace's tongue is. I check with her, to see if there is any discomfort but she assures me there isn't. So, I thread the laces and tighten them well. I continue with the Velcro and then we're all done. I help her up, and we slowly make our way to the living room where Rose is playing. The flowers long forgotten when she spotted her dolls on the ground.
I set her on the couch and spend the next few minutes making sure she's comfortable. I even go as far as fetching extra cushions because you never know. I make sure her ankle is elevated on the ottoman in front of her. I send Rose to the kitchen so we can have breakfast soon.
"Mama, I got you my princess plate!" Rose tells us, coming back to us. It's cute that she's trying to help her mom feel better.
"Rose, be careful. Stop running around and come eat breakfast." I manage to grab her arm and drag her to the kitchen table. I sit her down with her breakfast in front of her and a glass of juice. Hopefully, this will give me five minutes to tend to Scarlett.
I grab a tray and her coffee. I take the plate away from Scarlett and Rose immediately tries to stop me. "No Lita! That's for mama!"
"Rose, I need Mama's plate so I can give her food." I try to reason with the four year old but she just doesn't want to listen. Scarlett had to intervene from the couch for her to let me use the plate and even then, she insisted on plating Scarlett's pastry herself.
I lower the tray over Scarlett's lap, "Your coffee and your croissant my lady."
"Careful, or I could get used to this." She teases and I playfully roll my eyes.
Breakfast is a little more busy than I thought it'd be. All Rose wants is to eat with Scarlett on the couch but that's not possible. It looks like today, all she wants to do is to push boundaries and limits. She argues with Scarlett for a good ten minutes before accepting that she needs to stay at the living room table with me.
The rest of our day continues like this. We spend the day in the living room, watching movies and playing. Rose ends up taking a nap sprawled all over Scarlett. "Let me take her to bed, then we can talk."
With help from Scarlett, I manage to get room to bed. I close the door behind me and take a deep breath, preparing for what's about to happen. I slowly walk towards Scarlett. I sit down near her.
I find comfort in the fact that Scarlett seems to be feeling the same way I do. Apprehensive... scared maybe. She doesn't meet my eyes, only focusing on her fingers playing with the end of the blanket that is draped over her. The silence surrounding us is absolutely not comfortable, but I don't want to break it. And I'm sure Scarlet doesn't want to as well.
"I'm so sorry."
"I owe you an apology."
We both speak at the same time. It's a reassuring start. We're going in the right direction. Scarlet lifts her head, our eyes meet, and she offers me a small smile when she notices me already looking at her. "At least we're on the same page." She adds quietly and I decide to start.
"I didn't mean to blow off the way I did... I–"
Her hand holding onto mine cuts me off. Her finger brushing over my knuckles calms me down. "It's okay, I understand."
"But it's not really okay though. The way I reacted was too... Extreme. I could've handled things better if I hadn't been so blinded by my anger. I shouldn't have pushed you away. Subconsciously, I thought that it would hurt less, turns out it hurt me more than I could've ever imagined." I say, letting out a wet chuckle. I can be stupid sometimes. "I tend to protect myself from others, but being in a relationship requires vulnerability. It requires honesty. And I need to stop running away every time it gets a little complicated. I understand I took it too far, and I'll try not to jump into conclusions in the future."
"What's done is done. Now, all we can do is work to make is work on ourselves and our relationship, so it doesn't happen again any time soon, or at all." She says and I immediately agree.
"I was upset. I wasn't trying to ignore you and fuck this up, I just needed time to cool off–" I could've continued to ramble on and on if Scarlett didn't shush me.
"I understand." She starts and offers me a small and shy smile. "I apologize for not taking your complaints seriously as I should have. I understand it's something you're worried about. Despite the type of work that I do, I'm a pretty private person when it comes to my personal life and especially Rose, so when your pictures were all over the media, I just started doing what I usually do. Unfortunately, I am used to handling things on my own. I'm not sure what the solution to our situation is, but I understand that you're dissatisfied about it. We're a good team, we'll figure out a solution we can both live with. We'll do better next time." She assures me and I choose to believe her.
"I didn't realize what your perspective was before. That's not how I've ever thought about it. I was seeing it completely differently, but now that I know how you see it, and I see how scary it is... I'm glad I have a better understanding now. I'm sorry— for letting my anger get the best of me. We both make mistakes, and it's time to move forward from here."
"It's okay. You don't need to say sorry again. I forgive you. Don't be hard on yourself."
"I forgive you too."
I scoot closer to her and wrap my arms around her and I don't want to let go ever again. Scarlett lays her head on my chest and reaches for the TV remote to unpause the movie we put on earlier. We just sit there, content, in each other's embrace. We're back in this comfortable silence we're so sued to.
We watch a good chink of the movie, when Scarlett presses pause again. She pushes herself up, but stays silent. "I think we should tell Rose soon." She finally says. She pauses before adding on, "She's pretty smart. She sensed the anxious and awkward climate we created, and she's confused."
I take a deep breath in and suddenly I feel nervous. Rose and I have a good relationship, but wht will happen if she doesn't feel comfortable with me being in her life as her mother's girlfriend. "How do you think she's going to take it?"
"She loves you, you have nothing to worry about."
Scarlett's right.
I let her press play once again and continue to watch the movie until the credits roll. After checking on her ankle, Scarlett sends me to check on Rose. I peer inside her room and see her lying on the floor, all tangled in her duvet and holding her tortoise stuffed anima close.
It makes me want to laugh, but I don't want to risk waking up. All I do is pick her up and tuck her back under the covers.
Then I take care of cleaning the living room. It's a bit of a mess, but we did spend the entire day in this one room. I do everything under Scarlett's gaze. She tells me over and over again I'm doing things wrong and when she's not happy with what I'm doing she tries to stand up to show me. I'm quick to remind her that she's not supposed to move too much every single tie I push her back down on the couch. When she joked about being a bit of a neat freak, she was in fact not kidding. "Scarlett, if you don't sit your arse back down, I'll carry you back to your bedroom, and I'll handcuff you to the bed. Got it?"
"Kinky."
I turn around at her comment, and drop the wash cloth I am using to wipe the living room table that she insisted I clean, but again I was doing it wrong. "Scarlett, I'm being serious here."
"You wouldn't dare."
Just to prove a point and drop everything and wipe my hands on my jeans. I walk over to her, then I wrap my arms around the Scarlett's back and behind her knees. I lift her up, and she lets out a surprised squeal as I begin to walk down the hallway to her bedroom. "Alright, alright, I understand!"
I turn back around once I'm happy with her answer. "Stay in the couch."
"Yes ma'am." She says quietly. I bend over to kiss her cheek, but she turns her head last minute.
We share what I thought would be a quick kiss, however Scarlett had other things in mind. The kiss deepens and neither of us hear a door open or the muffled sound of patter against the floor.
"Mam–"
AUTHORS NOTE
heyyy
look who's back to her normal posting schedule! let's see how long it'll last but fingers crossed it'll be a little while.
im not going to lie i did miss posting my updates on sundays at 8pm CET (or CEST rn i guess), idk it's nice to be back to how it used to be before summer
i hope you enjoyed todays chapter, it didn't quite turn out the way i wanted it to but i can live with that
have a have lovely morning/afternoon/evening/night
alexis :)
+ this week's letterbox review by yours truly
(yes i do think im funny)