Alyssa
Lunch was not peaceful.
But not in a bad way.
More in a turned-out-everyone-has-wanted-to-punch-Cooper kind of way and now Axel was considered the coolest person in the year, which meant I was too by twin default.
There were a good twenty people crammed round us at lunch, though I only had interest in June, Maria and Haz. Still, it was kinda cool. People wanted to talk to me. They didn't think I was weird, some of them even asked if I was okay.
This school was awesome.
And a lot of things may suck, but choosing to give Ashton a shot was the best decision ever. Friends, and a dad, and some family friends, and a really nice house and school.
"Any update on Axel?"
"No, I hope he's okay,"
"That was badass. You know all these girls are here because they are drooling over him," Maria said, watching a few of them run off.
"Gross. It wasn't something to drool over, he wasn't even thinking of the situation at hand, I could see it in his face,"
"What do you mean?"
"He probably thought Cooper was going to do something to me, he's punched people before," I sighed.
"Oh right... I hope he's okay then. Apparently he got suspended for a day,"
"I hope Ashton's not done anything to him,"
"Maybe he will get grounded?"
"I don't know. I haven't seen Ashton get mad yet,"
"I'm sure he'll be fine," Haz said, rubbing my shoulder, "I'll be your fake brother for now,"
"Thanks. Sorry we are like, kinda weird,"
"You're not weird,"
"Okay,"
I looked round at everyone hovering and then looked down at my food, picking at it.
"Being the new kid is hard, but you've got us,"
"Yeah, I haven't been to school in ages, it's a lot to take in,"
"I can imagine. Want a ride in tomorrow since Axel isn't coming?" June asked, "My mum would get you,"
"I would like that... thank you,"
"No problem. We should probably get going to class now,"
"Let her finish eating,"
"I'm not hungry,"
Haz grabbed my bag and carried it for me to the next class, where we all sat down. They had me sit between them all, which was nice, because they helped me out. Plus, my geography teacher let me keep the overlay for the rest of the day so it helped.
Towards the end of the day, I got called to the office, so I packed my bags and followed the reception lady. I was a bit worried I was going to be in trouble for letting Axel punch someone, but the headteacher gave me a smile when I walked into his room.
"Nice to see you, have a seat. I thought I'd do a quick catch up before Ashton comes, I have heard it's been quite the day,"
"Am I in trouble?"
"Not that I know of,"
"Okay. Good,"
"Axel got suspended for a day, but he will be back and we will move on from it,"
"Okay,"
"How was your day? I'm sorry June didn't meet you guys," he asked.
"It's a nice school. I like my new friends,"
"That's really good to hear! You like your teachers?"
"Yeah,"
"Good. I heard you had a bit of a struggle reading earlier, you were meant to have things printed on coloured paper but sometimes word doesn't get round, so as of tomorrow that will be fixed. We're going to get you an assessment for dyslexia soon,"
"What does that do?"
"Well, they'll give you a few tasks to do and if you do have it, we can help you with exams, and school work,"
"Okay,"
"We want everyone in the school to reach their full potential, so it's important to us that you get all the help you need! Have you been told about any clubs? They might help you make even more friends,"
"That is too much,"
"Alright, have some quiet time before Ashton comes. Help yourself to tissues,"
If I thought about this all too much my chest hurt. If I looked past the nice school and friends I saw the bad grades, and how I embarrassed myself, and how I didn't know what I was even meant to do at school.
What if I was tricking myself into thinking I had a good day? All this time I was a nervous wreck for school and now I was going to come alone tomorrow and part of me wanted to. What if I was tricking myself? What if this wasn't good? School had never been good why would this be good?
"Alyssa, I heard you did really great today. Moving schools is really tough, but it sounds like you made friends, and were polite to the teachers, and tried doing the work,"
"Yeah,"
"We're gonna get you and Axel into some tutoring so you can catch up, but keep doing your best. It's okay to struggle a bit, all your teachers will help you out,"
I nodded and dried my eyes, covering my face with my hand until Ashton eventually came, picking my bag up from beside me.
"You didn't punch anyone too did ya?"
"She did not. She's won all her teachers and classmates over from what I heard!"
"Oh that's brilliant," he said, crouching down to invade my eyeline, "But probably very tiring huh? Shall we go home?"
"Where is Axel? Did you kick him out?"
"Of course I didn't kick him out, he's at Gabi's, she was the only person around,"
"You still love him?"
"I still love him. Come on, it's pasta for tea, you can tell me about your day while I cook,"
He put my bag on his shoulder and held his hand out, then took me to the car, helping me buckle up.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, it's been a mixed day,"
"I'm so proud of you. Wanna pick a treat up on the way home?"
"I think I have all the things I want,"
"Sounds about right, to be fair. So, tell me about your friends? Axel hasn't said much,"
"June, Maria, and Haz," I said quietly.
"Well that sounds awfully familiar,"
"To April, Maja, and Henry?"
"How did you know?"
"They're siblings,"
"No way! That's pretty cool,"
"I guess. Cos everyone loves Gabi," I grumbled.
"Are they nice?"
"Very nice, especially June. She hugged me when I was crying,"
"Why were you crying sweetheart?"
"I couldn't read and it all got too much,"
"Oh bless ya. Did they say they're gonna sort out something to help you?"
"Yeah,"
"Good. We'll have big cuddles at home, shall we get Axel?"
"Yes please,"
"Okie dokie. What did you have at lunch?"
"Hot food,"
"Very nice. Did you see the snack I gave you?"
"Yeah. Thank you,"
"And did you get chance to fill your bottle up?"
"I didn't finish it,"
"You should drink a bit more,"
"That's not my priority,"
"You need to drink enough,"
I turned away and looked out the window, because I didn't care about how much I had drunk and I didn't get why he did either when I had just been to school.
"Did you get any homework?"
"No,"
"Hear about any clubs?"
"No!"
"Alright," he said quietly, stopping the car outside Luke's house, "I'm not trying to nag,"
"It's been a very hard day, and you are nagging me,"
He beeped his horn, then reached across and hugged me, kissing my forehead a couple of times.
"But it was also good and that's scaring me,"
"I'm really glad that some of today was good. Are you going tomorrow?"
"June is picking me up,"
"That's wonderful. I'm happy for you, I hope it gets easier,"
Axel climbed into the car, then we set off again, going back home. I was very relieved to come back to the now familiar environment, and immediately went upstairs to change. I decided to have a quick shower, then Axel came and dried my hair for me, being way more gentle than earlier- I couldn't believe he had punched someone.
I mean, I could, but I also couldn't believe he had done it in a posh school. I don't think he could believe it either.
"How was the rest of your day?" he asked, both of us sitting on my bed.
"Good I think,"
"Sorry I blew our whole reputation within the first hour,"
"Everyone loves you,"
"Huh?"
"Like 20 girls hovered round us all at lunch, they think we are great,"
"Oh. Okay. That's good,"
"Your eye looks like crap,"
"I know," he smiled, "Didn't even bruise him,"
"Probably bruised his ego a bit,"
"I hope so,"
I rested my head on his shoulder and turned the tv on, but Ashton came in and muted it, perching on the end of the bed.
"Today's certainly been a day,"
"I'm sorry,"
"I was gonna make pasta but how about we order in and watch a movie together?"
"Huh?"
"Why aren't you mad?" Axel asked, "You should be really mad,"
"It's not great you punched someone but I know that you are both going through a lot still, and will continue to go through a lot. I'm not happy about it, but you're facing the punishment from school so I don't need to further it,"
"But you should be mad,"
"You should be happy I'm not,"
"But you're gonna store it,"
"No I'm not, you're facing a punishment. It's my job to make sure you don't do it again, and I think that spending time together is going to help,"
"I'm sorry,"
"Come here, it's been a weird day,"
I watched them both hug and chewed on the inside of my cheek, disliking the raised voices. When they hugged, I thought they fit together like puzzle pieces. Axel had always wanted a dad, and Ashton was the most perfect dad in the world for him. It was like they were crafted for each other. I thought that one way or another, the two of them would have met. They were meant to know each other. They got each other. They liked the same things, and Ashton had brought out a side of Axel I didn't even know existed.
I knew he had emotions, duh, but he never got emotional. I could see he was having a really hard time suddenly being emotional, but Ashton got it. Ashton knew what to do.
I was kind of a jagged puzzle piece, I probably didn't slot in as well and maybe was never meant to slot in, but I felt like Ashton was slowly sanding down the edges to make me fit in too. But, he wasn't sanding down my edges, he was sanding his own, to fit me. I didn't have to change, he was learning about me and adapting to me.
Today had made me feel lucky. I got friends and I got to go to a nice school, and I got a dad, and my brother wasn't alone anymore because honestly I probably hadn't been there for a while mentally. I wasn't sure if that actually made me lucky, but I was pretty sure it did. At least it felt that way to me.