Blood. It stained the ground beneath my feet. It turned the village's small stream red.
Corpses. Everywhere you look, there are familiar faces with twisted expressions covered in red.
The fence that surrounded the village had already collapsed. The air was thick with the stench of blood, and half of the village had been reduced to scorched earth.
When I found my father's body, his hand was still clenched tightly around a carrying pole, one used for fetching water home.
He clenched it so tightly that even with all of my strength, fourteen-year-old me couldn't get it out. I had no choice but to bury the carrying pole alongside my father, mother, and brother.
And my mom?
I found her body on a path near the village. She was tightly hugging my twin brother, but they were speared together.
The first time I heard the sound of a weapon moving against flesh was when I used all of my strength to pull the spear from the bodies of my brother and mother...
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"Ahh!"
I sprang up from the wooden bed, gasping for air.
The sound of snoring was all around me. Only Jackson, who slept closest to me, was woken up by my gasp.
He rubbed his eyes blearily, then he said, "You had a nightmare again?" He mumbled something as he went back to sleep, as if this was nothing new.
Still catching my breath, I clutched my sweat-soaked clothes of coarse cloth, one that I hardly ever took off.
It had been two years since my family was killed by the Huns, but I would still have dreams of that day from time to time.
It was utterly clear and realistic. I relived it again and again, but despite waking up in cold sweat every time, I would never hate this unyielding nightmare.
On the contrary, I hoped for it whenever night fell, because it was the only place I could see my family again.
I let out a heavy breath, then got up from the shared hardwood bed.
I walked out from the military tent, one occupied by a total of fifteen people.
"Who's there!?" A guard spotted me the instant I walked out from the tent.
It was presently war time; everyone was tense. No one could afford to be careless.
"Reporting! Infantry soldier from YG camp third unit, Liam Manoban!" I reported my unit in a practiced manner.
The patrolling soldier before me let out a breath.
Gripping a halberd and a shield, he checked my name plate carefully, then he turned and left.
I looked up. A full moon in the empty night sky. Its ghostly white moonlight enveloped the entire military camp.
Long years of battle had turned this area uninhabitable. This kingdom and the Huns had been struggling on this long borderline for about three years, with equal amounts of victories and losses on each side.
This stretch of land had turned into a scorched wasteland under the struggle between the Huns and the kingdom.
Not even the most stubborn of weeds could break through this soil that had been macerated with spilled blood and stomped solid by horse hooves.
Here, I could not hear the humming of bugs like I remembered from my childhood.
There were no other sounds other than the snores that traveled faintly through the entire military camp.
I fell into a trance as I looked at the moon in the sky. My mind returned to that place in my dreams once again.
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At the outskirts of the kingdom, there was a small village called Elderville.
And in that village, my father was the only teacher. He was the most respected person other than the village chief and the head guard.
My mother was gentle and dignified. I am Lisa, while my twin brother was named Liam.
We were clever and endearing children; but all of this ended two years ago.
I was bright and energetic, while Liam was more modest in comparison.
That day, I ran off to the mountains again, to search for some medicinal herbs that an old doctor who lived in the east of the village taught me about a few days ago.
However, when I returned to the village at sundown, the entire village had been massacred by Huns!
No one other than myself had survived.
I buried my own parents and brother, but I still had to face an entire village full of gruesome bodies.
I carried them on my back, burying them one by one. There were so many that even when a lot of bodies had started to smell, even when maggots appeared, I was not done burying them.
In the end, I had to set the entire village on fire.
Kneeling at the village entrance, I knocked my head heavily on the ground three times, "Everyone, I'm young and weak. I truly do not have the strength to bury everyone one by one. All I can do is to offer this fire, to prevent everyone from wasting away in the wilderness. Now that everyone has returned to dust, let me seek this vengeance instead."
Women could not become soldiers. I had to use Liam's identity to live on.
I traveled alone for several hundred miles. I begged for food when I was hungry, and if it didn't work, I would stave off my hunger with wild vegetables and tree bark.
I would also need to be wary of people who seemed compassionate, as they might actually be human traffickers.
Through this journey, I felt as if my past-self had long since died with my family in Elderville.
Finally, I arrived at the military camp led by a well-renowned General of the kingdom, General Windsor.
I enlisted using Liam's name. However, my family was not eligible to enter the military.
In this kingdom, the five ranking of status (peasant, commoner, noble, elite and royal) were separated clearly.
Unless it was permitted by the court, peasants could not enlist in the army.
Seeing that my last hope, the only thing keeping me alive, was about to be extinguished, I dropped to the floor.
I kneeled before the registrar, "Sir, I'm begging you, just let me enter the troops!"
The registrar wasn't that old. He was not over twenty-five or six, so how could he remain composed when an adolescent was kneeling before him?
Dropping his brush in a hurry, he moved to help me up as he said with a troubled voice, "Hey man, aren't you putting me on the spot here? Your family ranking is not allowed in the military, so I can't make that decision. To get enlisted isn't a major issue, but it's not a minor one either. I'm just someone who became a mere registrar because I can read some words, I don't have that authority!"
"Sir, I'm begging you. I'm begging! My whole village has been killed by the Huns. My dad, my mom, my... twin sister, they're all dead. If I hadn't run up the mountains to play, I wouldn't have the life to come over here. Other than me, none of the hundred and eighteen lives in the entire village were spared! Elderville was covered in bodies. So many bodies have started to smell, but no one could help me bury them, so I burned the village. I walked all the way here just to enlist in the army, Sir, I am begging you!"
I spoke with sorrow and grief, but I did not cry. I simply kneeled there as firmly as a pillar nailed into the ground, letting the registrar pull me to no avail.
Her stood still as he studied me for a good while. Ultimately, he gritted his teeth, then he said, "I guess I've got nothing to lose. I'll go and see the Commander-in-Chief right now, but success or failure is up to heaven's will. You and I will agree beforehand. If it does not go well, do not continue to badger me!"
I did not answer. I simply knocked my head to the floor, expressing my stance on the matter.
A while later, the registrar came back to take me to the big tent.
When Grand General Windsor saw me, he simply gave me a few simple words of condolences, then he sent his Adjutant to add me to the list.
Just like that, I took on the name of Liam Manoban, to live on in this world as a soldier.
Two years had swung by since then...
For a woman to enlist in the military as a man, and to register under a false identity— those were both serious crimes in the kingdom.
Added together, it would be enough to get me beheaded. But I did not care.
What could I be afraid of?
My entire family was dead. I was prolonging my time alive only to bring justice to my parents, my brother, and the hundred and eighteen lives in the entire village!
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