Dear Diary...
Home started to become better. The last few days, well Nancy at least came to my room to cry. She would look for me when she felt the need to pull away. I was enjoying being needed, but whenever she would need me, well it put me in this place of sadness.
The only cure for this seemed to be the presence of Eddie or Sunday dinners.
Eddie went with me for every one of the meals. I like to think it was for me, but the meals also gave him a sense of belonging to the family as well. He always greeted Mrs. Emerson with such enthusiasm. It was cute to watch his surprise at all the different desserts she would make.
I looked forward to getting to know them more. Especially when I got to help clean up the dishes and even just help prepare the dinner sometimes. This gave myself and Mrs. Emerson some time to get close and have some "girl talk" as she put it. Spending time with Gareth and his mother was one of my new favorite things.
When we broke the news about Eddie's proposal, well they all were ecstatic. Mrs. Emerson invited me over for tea one afternoon. She didn't know if I liked tea, but at the last Sunday dinner she asked for some time with the two of us. She wanted to get to know me more and to really talk more about my mom.
Eddie was worried, but Gareth said they could hang out and jam while I was there. I think jamming was the same as practicing in the garage and putting each other in headlocks?
We got to the front door, Eddie had brought flowers and I held his other hand as we waited. The door sprung open and there was the familiar whirlwind of Abigail Emerson. She smiled at you and danced, "Princess Sarah!" She signed excitedly.
We had been playing a lot of dolls, which I didn't mind as I never got to play with toys growing up. Abigail was very found of princesses and nights. We even spent an entire evening making a paper mache dragon and painting it to look like Ozzie. She loved it and I told Eddie we needed to buy a proper one for her for Christmas. He agreed and had smirked, "Christmas is going to be so fun." His hands moved faster now and I could tell he was excited.
Behind her came Mrs. Emerson who gave me a big hug and kissed Eddie on the cheek for the flowers. She signed thank you and pointed to the back, Eddie signed thank you, gave me a quick kiss on the lips then made his way to the back of the house.
I watch him head off and go back to meeting her eyes. I could not get used to signing her name just yet and she had asked me to call her Madeline, but I knew it wouldn't be right. I had a hard time calling Wayne... well Wayne. He was Mr. Munson, it was better that he didn't know sign language as he was embarrassed when he found out I talked with him so formally.
He had offered to come to the next Sunday dinner, so I had to ask Mrs. Emerson if that was okay. I was sure she would be alright with it, apparently they both had to go down to the local police station together for the boys on several occasions. As well as Eddie having to apologize to her at Wayne's direction.
Abigail still had hold of your hand as she skipped and spun herself around. You adored the little girl, never thinking about having younger siblings or even children of your own. After the who thing with Nancy, well it seemed too real. You didn't want to rush anything but imagining a little Eddie was enjoyable.
A little puff of curls running about pretending to rock on a guitar or slay dragons. The very thought had a permanent smile stuck on your face.
Mrs Emerson brought you out to the backyard, we could see the boys in the garage. Eddie was head banging along with something, you assumed it must be a cassette. I looked at Abigail and she made a gross face, "too loud and too stupid" she signed. It made me smile and I just shrugged.
She smiled, when she laughed her whole body shook, it was like she was filled with more joy than a normal little girl. I adored her.
I looked over and they were watching us now, I waved and Eddie smiled and started to jump up and down. I looked back at Mrs. Emerson, "they want to put on a show while we have tea." She signed as she rolled her eyes then showed me the table she set up. It was a vision, you didn't know what you were expecting but this made you smile.
The wooden table had some flannel place-mats, along with normal tea cups, you were expecting delicate ones, bread and jams, cookies and milk. You jumped a bit and then got embarrassed. Abigail then smiled, "isn't it wonderful." She signed.
I nodded my head ecstatically.
That's when I felt Eddie's arm around my shoulders as he snagged some bread swooping it through the jam and giving me another kiss on lips as he ran back. I watched what looked like a shoe fly after him, turning to Mrs. Emerson who was shouting and back to Eddie who has jam almost ear to ear as he smirked close lipped like a child himself.
She motioned for me to sit and as soon as I chose a chair, Abigail was in the one next to me. She started to eat her bread and jam, being just as messy and endearing as Eddie.
Mrs. Emerson smiled and took a breath, "I heard about you and Eddie. Are you excited for after graduation?" She signed and spoke, Abigail jumped up and started in, "you are going to be so pretty! Are you going to wear a long dress or "
"That's enough Abigail. We need to sit and be polite company." Mrs Emerson winked and signed to the two of us. She turned back to the table and sat up straight, taking her tea cup and sticking her pinkie up. I could tell that this tea was more for Abigail then myself and I wouldn't have it any other way.
The afternoon was filled with conversation and stories. It was the first time in a while that I enjoyed an afternoon so much. Abigail danced to the boys playing and Mrs. Emerson laughed and enjoyed the rest of us. At some point Abigail fell asleep in my lap and Gareth had come over to kiss his mom, scooping Abigail up to take her inside.
Eddie motioned that he needed to use the restroom. It was quite the gesture and it made Gareth almost drop Abigail laughing.
When they left and it was just the two of us I noticed Mrs. Emerson shift into a more calm mood. She looked at me and hesitated with her next motion, "Sarah. Do you have someone to walk you down the aisle?"
I looked at her and thought to myself. I didn't, obviously my father, or the person I thought was my father would not be a good choice. So I was left examining the options. She steadied, "I could do it if you don't have another parent in mind." Her hands shook as she signed and I reached for them, taking them in mine and holding them across from her at the table.
I nodded. The brief motion seemed to provide just enough clarity to bring an immense emotion to the eyes of the woman. So much so you had to stop holding her hands to sign, "I've never known a mom's touch till I met you. I love your family."
She looked at me wiping her eyes with a napkin from the table then frowned, "This is your family to Sarah. Please know if you need anything I am here."
That stopped me, I didn't know what to say back to that. I breathed in and felt the tears, but decided to ask, "Nancy. She isn't feeling well. How can a friend help mend a broken heart?"
It was her turn to stop and think, "you can dull the pain, but if someone truly hurt her, she may just need to bear the scar."
I thought about the idea of Nancy with a scarred heart, it pained me and made me want to hurt Jonathan more. Then you glance back over, "Does everyone have scars?"
"Some more than others, I like to think that their are some that didn't get scarred. Yet, here I am." She signed and smiled sweetly.
We sat for a bit and I thought over what she was trying to express. I would have to give Nancy a big hug. Then it dawned on me, "Can Mr. Munson come for Sunday dinner?" I signed slowly, almost pausing at the spelling of Munson.
She looked at me and nodded. Taking a few slow sips of her tea. It was just in time for Gareth and Eddie to come back out of the house. Eddie was trying to get Gareth in a headlock, whereas Gareth pushed him and he went flying into some of the bushes they had in the yard. I smiled at the sight, I knew that Eddie had felt a bit neglected and needed you to reassure him that he was yours.
Gareth pointed at Eddie and laughed. I stood up and walked over as Eddie crawled out of the bushes and sat down. He had leaves and sticks in his hair and a pout on his face. I knelt down in front of him and smiled, "You look handsome." I signed.
He blushed and smiled, "And you're beautiful."
He pulled you towards him, kissing you and it made all the butterflies take off in your stomach. There was so much to be thankful and happy for. Looking over you can see Gareth making gag faces when he sees me and smiles, "I'm glad you are happy Sarah." he signed then winked.
Eddie stood up and took you in his arms, wrapping you up in his arms and kissing your hair. He looked at Mrs. Emerson, "Do you need help?" he signed.
"No. Gareth will help. You two go home." She signed and waved, "Take care of Sarah."
Eddie nodded and smiled at me, "Everyday" he signed.
He laced his fingers with yours and helped you back out the door. He was dragging you in a hurry. Once you were safely in the passenger seat and he could see the light turn off at their front door, he turned to you and claimed your lips.
He kissed you hard and you felt a vibration against your lips, as you pulled away, touching them and looking at him.
"I am so happy." He signed, "That was a lot of fun."
I nodded, "Mrs. Emerson wants to walk me down the aisle."
Eddie's eyes widened and another one of his best grins spread across his face. He then looked over, "Should we go see if Wayne is home?"
I nodded, "Yes please."
He kissed me again then booped my nose with a single finger before settling back into the driver's seat. His hair still had bits of the bushes in it, but you swore no other boy would mean as much as Eddie did to you.
He strummed his hands on the steering wheel then placed one hand on your knee as he started away from the Emerson's home. A smile on both of our faces.