CHAPTER 58: REASON I LOVE YOU
Lucius sat underneath one of the large trees that surrounded the estate centered in the middle of a very thick forest. Sunrays penetrated the tree branches that were filled with bright green leaves, and gave Lucius just enough light as he rested in the tree's shadow.
The green eyes of the 18 year old were fixed on the sparing match that was going on further ahead of him, closer to the large villa. The red and the onyx haired knights were shimmering with the light layer of sweat that had started, covering their skin as they fervently dogged each other's attacks.
But that was not what Lucius was interested in. What his eyes couldn't part with was how the man he loved moved as if he was dancing in the most elegant way he had ever seen. His eyes were locked on how he slide sideways dodging a flying dagger and then dropping to the floor to dodge another attack before he swung his sword to commence an attack of his own.
Even though the two were moving in an almost blur because of how fast they were training, he saw every move that was made by Noah as if in slow motion. His hair drifting in the wind, his body turning just in time to evade the weapons that were flying at him, his arms moving gracefully as they slashed his sword cutting through the air swiftly.
As he gazed at them, his eyes would now and then glance downwards toward the once blank paper that was now reflecting a vivid image of a fighting Noah, concentrating on the battle at hand, his eyes fierce. The charcoal pencil that Lucius was swiftly moving over the page was defining the image even more, making it look even more realistic.
"What are you doing?" the voice startled him from the daze he was in as he got sucked into his drawing. He pulled the sketch book behind him immediately as he turned to look at Lorena who had a smirk on her face.
He blushed lightly before he blurted quickly, "Nothing!"
Lorena held a finger next to her lips, as if in thought, before saying with an arched eyebrow, "Didn't seem like nothing."
"It was nothing." Lucius repeated, flustered even more now than a second ago. He did love to sketch but he never dared show them to anyone, the little book a secret of his since he started seeing his knight on the rooftop opposite his window. "What are you doing here, weren't you supposed to be with Liam?"
"He went into the forest to collect some herbs that he hadn't grown in his garden. I don't know why he doesn't just use the new medicines everyone is using instead of making his own. I didn't feel like going on such a trip, I am a delicate girl you know. " Lucius almost laughed at her reply but held it back, Lorena was far from delicate when a spear or a sword was placed in her hand. "Sooo... what are you doing?"
Lucius was hoping that he did a good job of changing the subject, but he was wrong, he got to his feet still holding the book with all the sketched that he was 100% sure he would never show a soul, and said, "Watching them spar." he motioned with his head at the two that were still engrossed in their fight, if he didn't know better he would say that they were actually trying to kill each other.
"WOW! Looks like they are taking it seriously... did Blayth piss my brother off again or something?" Lorena asked slightly amused.
Lucius merely sighed before saying, "Actually they were bragging... wait no, Blayth was bragging and Noah got irritated and challenged him to a duel. Their hopeless" Lucius sighed once more remembering how loud the two got before deciding to fight it off.
"Where is Leon then? Usually he would be close and would restrain his Ape. " she chuckled lightly as she used the name that only Leon used when Blayth got on his nerves.
Lucius couldn't help but join her before replying, "Well he was there but he thought it would be interesting since the two didn't spar in a while, but then Lazarus asked him to help him with something."
"Poor Leon. He is really missing out, that is some intense duel." The two stared at the sparing men for a while before Lorena spook again, "Lucius?"
"Yes?" Lucius turned to look at her in question.
"What is that?" She asked pointing at the book that was showing from behind the blonde.
"Uhh..." he shifted uncomfortably and tried to hide the object better behind his back, "n-nothing..."
She narrowed her eyes, more curious than before at his reply. "Lucius, come on, tell me." She smiled at him sweetly trying to get him to just show it to her. Noah saw from the corner of his eyes Lucius looking flustered, and was more intrigued by that than the fight, he blocked another attack before he turned and started to walk to the two that had been watching them.
"Hay! Where are you going?" Blayth yelled behind him but then saw the two standing by a tree and how Lucius was trying to back away from Lorena suspiciously, hiding something behind him. It peaked Blayth's interest as well at that point as he followed Noah, completely forgetting about their fight.
Lucius looked up at Noah once he felt his presence close. He tilted his head upwards to look at Noah who was standing close to him before Noah said, "What are you two talking about?"
"He is hiding something." Lorena stated and pointed at Lucius with a smirk, she knew that if anyone could get Lucius to talk it was Noah.
"LORENA!" Lucius yelled at her in disbelief.
Noah tried reaching for it, but Lucius turned slightly pushing it further behind him, he couldn't even think about anyone seeing it, especially not Noah. Noah arched a brow before saying, "let me see that."
"NO!" Lucius yelled stubbornly as his face was covered with a light blush.
"What is it?" Blayth asked as he stood next to Noah. Lucius felt surrounded, but was adamant on not letting any of them know.
"Nothing." Lucius said again. Noah was sure it was not though; Lucius didn't act that way so often, so he felt the need to see what he was hiding. He reached for it once more only for Lucius to try and hold it out of his reach. Noah then kept grabbing for it, Lucius only dodging his attempts, until they started turning around each other. "Leave me alone!" Lucius yelled.
"Not a chance." Noah was now smirking as he kept trying to get what now he knew was a book of some sorts. He loved the challenge, and he loved how Lucius was trying so hard to not give in.
"NO! NOAH! I SAID STAY AWAY!" he kept yelling as he felt like he would lose soon. He turned once more, this time his back was to Blayth as he held the book high above his head trying to keep it out of Noah's reach when Blayth wrapped his hands around Lucius's arms and held him in place, as Noah finally snatched the sketch book from his grasp.
"Don't, Noah! Don't you dare open it! Let go of me. BLAYTH! I swear to god if you don't I will kill you!" Lucius struggled against the red head, starting to get angered by how embarrassed he was, his only thoughts were of how Noah was going to see what he had been drawing
Noah smirked, "Thanks, Blayth." Blayth winked as he kept his hold on Lucius.
Noah turned around and was about to open the book when Lucius said, "Noah, please, don't!" his face was getting really hot as he blushed fiercely.
Noah's eyes grew wide as he looked at one of the sketches in the book, he flipped once more to look at another, and then another, and then another. "Blayth, if you don't let go I will kick you between your legs!" Lucius exclaimed as a desperate attempt to get free.
"Don't do that, I happen to like what's between his legs."
"LEON!" both Lucius and Blayth exclaimed in mortification at how easy it was for him to say something like that. Leon merely shrugged with a smug look on his face, he had suddenly appeared by their side seconds ago, hearing part of the conversation.
Lucius felt Blayth's distraction and elbowed him in his ribs as he pulled out of his grip and rushed to Noah. He stepped in front of a baffled looking Noah and tore the sketch book out of his hands. Noah's eyes looked up meeting Lucius's hazel ones; Lucius's face was flush with embarrassment. "I told you not to look, idiot!"
"How long have you been drawing that?" Noah asked as he felt his heart swell with more love, he didn't even know that that was possible. He already loved him with his whole being.
"Since I saw you first! Now shut up, I am not talking to you!" Lucius said.
"But I've seen your sketches before, what's different?"
"Doesn't matter!" Lucius yelled, and was about to head back inside the house when Noah grabbed his arm and spun him back around before he crushed his lips to Lucius's in a passionate kiss. Lucius loved how Noah's lips felt against his, but he also remembered that he was going to die of embracement so he pushed at Noah's chest to free himself. Noah parted his lips from Lucius's but never let go of his arms. "Stop it! I told you I am not speaking to you!" Lucius stated childishly, Noah loved how adorable he got when he was that way.
Noah once again locked his lips with Lucius's and kissed him for a few more seconds. He then parted shortly asking, "What were you saying?"
Lucius blushed deeper before opening his mouth to say, "I said-...." Noah took that opportunity to kiss him once more, this time slipping his tongue into Lucius's parted lips as Lucius stood there stunned. Noah moved his tongue against Lucius's, loving the sweet taste of his mouth.
Noah pulled back once again and said, "What was that?"
"Stop-..." Noah was smirking as he once again interrupted Lucius by attaching their lips to each other. Noah could never get enough of his Lu, now more than ever, especially after what he had just seen.
The sketch book was filled with drawings. All of them were of him. Sleeping, smiling, angry, training, and even attempting to cook. He was shocked how he got those moments. His surprise subsided and was replaced with extreme love for him. He loved him; everything about him. From how he called him an idiot; to how he held himself in a battle; to how he curled up, cuddling close to him as they slept. Everything. He also loved how he always was the first thing that he remembered once he started regaining his memories.
Lucius melted in the kiss, forgetting everything as he reached upwards and slid his fingers around Noah's hair band that was holding it in a low ponytail, he pulled at it bringing Noah's lips even closer to his as he deepened the kiss. His sketch pad long forgotten and had fallen onto the ground next to him.
Noah felt this and complied, loosening his grip around his arms. Lucius felt the fingers around his arms go lax and he remembered what had just happened. Even though he loved the feel of Noah's soft, plump lips against his, he was going to take the chance to escape him.
"Guys! Lazarus says lunch is ready!" Toby announced from where he stood at the door, Edmur standing next to him. Tobias noticed the two that were in the middle of making out and said loud enough for them to hear him from where they stood, "Really, you two, don't you get tired of that?"
"Leave them alone, Toby. They look adorable together, don't you think?" Edmur asked.
Toby glanced at him before he got caught in a fit of laughter, "You are not even looking at them. What are you reading anyway?"
Edmur smiled and glanced sideways before returning to his book, "I have seen it enough times. And you are not really interested in what I am reading.."
"True, Ed, I am more interested in this..." Toby then tilted Edmur's chin so he was facing him before he placed his lips on his.
When Toby pulled back Edmur said, "You don't seem to get tired of it either. Now please go back to ignoring me so I can finish reading."
"But you never finish reading..." Toby whined as he pouted. Edmur chuckled before he went back to his book.
"No. I can't handle another day of the same meal!" Blayth complained as Lazarus had been trying to perfect a new dish he was learning.
Lucius snapped out of it at that precise moment and pulled away, he quickly snatched his sketchbook from the ground and started heading to the house, his face so red. "Stay away from me. If you think a kiss would make me forget what just happened, it won't. I am still not speaking to you!" Lucius yelled over his shoulder as he rushed to the door, where the two that had just appeared stood. Noah couldn't help the loud laugh that escaped him that only got Lucius more flustered.
"Will you stop threatening to not speak to me every time I do something you don't like?" Noah called after him as he followed him inside.
***
"Cole." Noah said with a grin when he saw the man walk in through the door later that day, going up to him to give him a hug, "You've been gone for a while."
"That's what happens when you have 2 children." Cole chuckled as he took a seat on the couch next to Noah and Lucius, "So this is Lucius?" He asked, smiling at the man sitting next to Noah.
"Hi. I'm sorry, I still don't remember everyone here." Lucius said as he extended his hand.
"It's alright. My name is Cole. I am your cousin from two lifetimes ago." Cole smiled at him.
"Nice to meet you again." Lucius muttered.
"Cole!" Tobias said as he walked out of the library, eyes landing on the 43 year old sitting next to Lucius.
"Toby!" Cole greeted the same way, laughing as he got up, walking up to him and giving him a strong embrace, "How are you and Ed?"
"Both fine. Benjie is too. What brings you by?"
"Benjie actually." Cole smiled, "I need to speak to him."
"Sounds important." Tobias said.
"Life choices, you know." Cole shrugged.
"Like the' refusing immortality' choice?" Toby asked.
Cole chuckled as he said, "Still stuck on that?"
"What can I say? I had planned a life with you in it." Toby said in defeat, but still smiled.
"And I wanted a simple one, Toby. Besides, you got Benjie." Cole said, "And I got a beautiful wife, and amazing children."
"How are they?" Tobias asked.
"Good. Really good." Cole answered.
"You should bring them over soon. It's been some time since we've seen them." Tobias told him.
"It is getting harder to explain why no one looks any different around here." Cole laughed.
Tobias joined him before saying, "I'll go get Benjie for you then."
"Thanks." Cole said.
"But you will have to show me pictures of my nephews." Tobias laughed as he walked away.
"Of course." Cole agreed before taking a seat next to Lucius as Tobias left. "So how are things with you?"
"You are the only one not immortal?" Lucius asked with a frown.
"I didn't want to be." Cole explained.
"Ira got to him." Noah muttered, making Cole laugh.
"She is wise. I saw things from her point of view. If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be where I am now. She is a good mentor." He said fondly.
"Benjie, Cole is here." Tobias said as he walked into the lab, watching his apprentice pull his eye shield off, looking towards him with a smile as he set his torch down.
"It's been a while." Benjie said.
"He says he has something important to tell you." Tobias said, "I can take care of this until you are back."
"Toby, you promised you'd let me work on this one alone." Benjie argued, pulling the torch away when Toby was about to reach for it, "How about you come with me instead? I know you are dying to see their pictures."
"He promised to show them to me before he left." Toby said.
"Still. Come." Benjie insisted, getting a dragged sigh from Toby before he walked with him back into the living room. "Brother." Benjie said as he went to him, pulling him close, "I've missed you."
"It's only been a few months." Cole laughed.
"A few months too long." Benjie said. "What made you come all the way?"
"You know you could visit too." Cole said with an arched eyebrow, "I came because I wanted to see you and let you know of some things."
"Of course." Benjie nodded.
"Where is Mel?" Cole asked.
"Umm..." Benjie glanced at Tobias from the corner of his eyes, seeing him nod at him encouragingly. "You know how she studied with Liam all those years? When she wasn't sitting with Ed reading?" Benjie laughed.
"Yeah?"
"Well when the war started, she said she wanted to help. Of course I was against it, as were everyone here, but you know how stubborn she is. She insisted on going-..."
"What the hell, Benjie! I leave you to take care of her alone for a few months only, just to come back and find out you've sent her to war?!" Cole said angrily.
"Cole, she has a protection spell on her." Benjie said quickly, watching his brother frown. "Wyatt insisted on spelling her before she left. She is safe. He'd know if anything happened, and he says she is alright. Even if she was bombed, the spell would protect her."
"What happens when the house is attacked again and they need Wyatt?" Cole demanded, "What then?"
"Brother, Wyatt is strong. She is keeping in touch as well. If anything did happen, we will tell her to retreat to a safe place. She is working as a nurse with the army now. She is saving lives, like she'd always wanted to do."
"Benjie, I worry. You know I worry." Cole sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose.
"You have children of your own now, brother. You shouldn't be so worried about us. We're grown." Benjie told him, placing a hand on his knee from where he had taken a seat on the low table in front of him.
"The older you get, the more worried I get." Cole sighed, "I can't help it. I've looked after you two for years. It is not easy to just let go."
"I know." Benjie nodded in understanding, "So, what did you want to tell me?"
"Pictures first?" Cole asked, feeling like delaying as much as possible.
Benjie smiled widely as he nodded, "Definitely."
"Here." Cole said, pulling a few out of his bag and placing the albums on his brother's knees.
"More than just two photos?" Benjie asked excitedly.
"Lena decided she wanted full albums with pictures of the kids, some with us all together. She wanted you and Mel to be there, but I couldn't reach you." he explained as Benjie opened the first one.
"Oh god, Amy has grown so much." Benjie fawned over the pictures, "She is so pretty. She even has your eyes."
"I guess our blood is still strong." Cole smiled, "Didn't miss a generation this time."
"Seems like it." Benjie said, flipping the page.
"Can is see?" Lucius asked, where Benjie handed him one of the albums as he continued to browse his. "My god, they are gorgeous kids. What's your son's name?" Lucius asked as he flipped to the next.
"Lucius."
"Huh?" Lucius asked, raising his eyes to look at him, thinking he called him.
"No." Cole chuckled, "My boy. His name is Lucius."
Lucius smiled as he asked, "Really?" seeing the node Cole gave him, he asked, "Why?"
"You don't remember, Lucius, but I owe you my life, as well as Benjie and Mel's. Because of you, we have lives. Because of you, I have a family of my own. Because of you I know what love is, and how powerful it is. You are the reason I am still here today. That is why Lucius, that is why my boy is named after you. I hope he becomes the kind of man you are when he grows up. It would make me so proud."
Lucius's eyes softened as he reached over, grabbing Cole's hand as he said, "I wish I remember you soon. You seem important to me somehow."
"You are important to me too, Lucius." Cole nodded, he then turned to Benjie as he said, "You too brother." Benjie looked at him with a frown, wondering what he meant by his words before he said, "I came to tell you that I have enlisted in the army. I have to make sure this world is safe for my children to grow up in, so-..."
"What is wrong with you?" Benjie demanded, cutting him off, "You give me an ear full about Mel then you tell me you are doing the same thing?"
"Ben-..."
"Don't you dare." Benjie said, "Don't you dare patronize me, Cole. I am younger than you, but I am not a child. I understand things. I understand the need to protect family and country, but not at the risk of leaving them. What the hell? What will happen to your children and wife?"
"I've made sure they are taken care of. My kids have trusts in their names. Lazarus was kind enough to give me a small fortune. My wife can live a life of luxury until she dies of old age. My children too. They will be fine."
"What about having a father? They need a father, Cole, not damn money!" Benjie said.
"We grew up without a father just fine-..." Cole started saying when he was cut off.
"We had Lazarus, and everyone else in this house looking out for us and helping us through life as we grew up."
"They will have you-..."
"No, no, no!" Benjie said as he stood up, placing the album he had on the table beside him, "No! I will not play daddy in your stead! They are my nephews, not my children. And I love them but I am the worst person you could ask to do this. You are not going to abandon them and stick me with taking care of the mess you leave behind!" he said, about to walk away.
"Benjie! Wait!" Cole demanded, making him stop.
"You will go, you will die. What am I left with but your children to take care of? You know I am bad at handling responsibilities. Till this day Toby doesn't trust me alone in the lab. Taking care of children?" Benjie asked, turning to him with tearful eyes with a deep frown of anger trying to cover his hurt, "You want to leave me too? Mel, and now you? Why? At least Mel is spelled to be safe. You aren't immortal because of stupid ideology you got from Ira. What would she know? She is just as messed up as the rest of us. And you won't let us use a protection spell either because you think death would come when it will come, that we shouldn't fight it. You know what? Ira is stupid-..."
"Ben-..."
"I am not finished! You are finally happy! You are finally over the past! Finally able to move on after what our bastard father did, and don't think I don't know. I realized what he did a while back. After I thought through everything that happened since then, even back then when you used to lock our door. I used to wonder why only at night, now I know. I know and shit, it kills me that you had to go through that to protect us." Benjie frowned at the look on his brother's face, one that told him that he wished Benjie didn't know. "Now you have a wife. You are in love. You have two beautiful children who adore you, who would do anything and everything to be with you. But you are leaving all that behind for what?"
"For them." Cole told him, his shoulders falling, "I need to keep them safe. I need to keep danger away from them, Ben. I trained with the best, brother, I am strong and capable. I can defend and protect just like any other man out there. I will not hide in a house while soldiers die out there trying to keep us safe."
"I will go then! I am immoral. I can go and fight-..."
"No, Benjie." Cole said firmly.
"Why not? Why won't you let me return the favor? Why won't you let me protect you for a change?" Benjie asked in desperation.
"I am still your big brother, Ben." Cole smiled softly at him, "It is my job to keep you safe, not the other way around."
"You refused immortality, so I thought it was fine since I had 20 some more years with you before I would worry about your death. Why would you do this? Why does everyone around me keep leaving or dying?" he asked as he glanced towards Lucius for merely a second before a tear rolled down Benjie's cheek and he turned around and walked out of there, leaving Cole to sigh heavily before taking a seat and gathering the albums.
"Cole, why must you go?" Noah asked.
"I can't bring them here and expose them to this world. I can't leave them out there knowing what could happen to the country. The crazy out there is beatable, unlike the magic world, or your mage enemies." Cole explained, "I just wish Benjie would understand."
"He's just scared." Lucius muttered, his fingers running over a picture with two children smiling widely in it. "The world could be scary sometimes, especially when the people you love are in danger."
"Exactly." Cole said, thinking Lucius understood his point.
"Cloe, you don't get it." Lucius said, glancing at him, "Your wife and children are the ones you love. To Benjie, you are the only family he knows and loves. So see it from his point of view. If you are gone, the only blood relative he will have will be your sister. What if she were to die too, and from the conversation I understand she isn't immortal either. So what if both of you end up dead. Where will that leave Benjie?"
"Here." Cole answered, "With you. People who proved to love him just as much as I do. As long as he is here, he will be fine. That I know for sure."
"But you are asking him to take care of your kin." Lucius reminded, "So he won't really be here, now would he?" Cole seemed to think about it before getting to his feet, "Where to?"
"Lazarus is smarter than all of us combined when it comes to these kinds of things. I will go ask him his thoughts." Cole sighed as he walked off.
At Lucius's confused look Noah said, "He admires father so much to not ask him for his opinion on things. He does it all the time." Noah smiled.
"What did their father do to him?" Lucius asked as he flipped another page to new photos. When Noah was quiet for a long time, Lucius glanced at him asking, "Was it that bad?"
"It was." Noah said, "This time I will tell you about all of it before you remember it. I don't want a repeat of what happened last time. The shock you had when the memory returned." Lucius pressed his lips before looking down at the pictures again.
"Maybe you shouldn't. With what happened when Atrabilious showed me the past." Lucius told him, making Noah press his lips with uncertainty. "You never know, maybe I won't get the chance to remember it." Lucius shrugged before deciding to change the subject, "Why isn't their sister immortal either? Cole's mortality is because of Ira's ideology rubbing off on him, but why her too?"
"She heard how Ira couldn't have children of her own because of the spell, so she decided she'd have a family, then become immortal." Noah said with a soft smile, "She wants a big family. One thing I am sure of, when she realizes they would outgrow her, she will opt not to become immortal."
"Did you ever consider that?" Lucius asked, turning to look at him again.
"No. The life I dreamed of was always with you. I never even considered children. Not to mention we already have Shadow." Noah chuckled.
"Who is that?" Lucius asked.
"The wolf pup you gave me to raise." Noah told him with a smile.
"A wolf?" Lucius asked in shock.
"I had spelled him to become immortal since I could lose him, but then one day I couldn't find him. Eventually, after almost a month he came back and I realized that that would be our life from then on. He goes into the forest, and every once in a while comes back here. Stays for a few weeks before going back. I think he leads the forest's pack now. Has been for a while, since he's the one that doesn't age."
"Don't you think it is lonely for him?" Lucius asked with a frown.
"I've thought about it. I think it is the reason he still comes back here. To be around familiar faces, ones that don't change unlike his own kind." Noah sighed, "But what am I to do now? It was a rash decision. I didn't think it through, and now he is immortal. It is not like I could reverse the spell. Besides, I think as long as one of us is alive, he will be fine."
"I hope you are right." Lucius said, "Cole does have a perfect family."
"You should have met them when they came a few months back." Noah nodded, "They are amazing. His son is very intelligent despite his young age. His daughter reminds me so much of Mel, his sister when she was younger. So full of energy."
"I might not see them again... I wish to remember before then. So I could say a proper goodbye." Lucius sighed, "I really want to remember them."
"You will. Eventually you will." Noah said.
It was later that day, Cole having decided to stay a few days, went to his brother's room where he'd been hiding from him, waiting for him to leave so he'd not see him. Cole knocked on the door, going inside without waiting for a reply. Benjie looked away when he saw that it was Cole, going back to the device he was putting together.
"Ben-..."
"Get out." Benjie muttered, picking up a small piece of metal and trying to fit it into the device.
Cole sighed, going to the couch where Benjie was, taking a seat beside him before he asked, "What are you making?"
It took a moment before Benjie said, "Tobias and I have been trying to figure out how to make small telephones so we could have them with us all the time."
It was another long silence with Cole watching Benjie work before he said, "Benjie, it was you who decide to become immortal, not I. I had no choice in it. You said you had a lot more to do before growing old and dying. You didn't want to go before doing everything you wanted. That much I agreed with, because I want you to live, to try and be happy. And I've not seen you happier than when you worked with Tobias in that lab. You knew your decision would mean we wouldn't get to be together for long, you knew it, and I thought you were alright with it."
"I wanted to change your mind. I thought that you'd see where I was coming from and decide to stay alive for us, but then I realized that because of Amy and Lucius that you would never do it." Benjie's hands relaxed around the device, his eyes still trained on it as he added, "That is fine. Because I had you. I still had you, even if you were out there with your other family, you were alive. That, I am alright with, but not with you going to war."
"You are my family too, Ben." Cole said, placing a hand on his brother's knee, "And I don't want to lose you either. It wouldn't have been a choice if I didn't have you and trust that you'd look after them if anything happened to me. But I promise to be careful, brother. I promise to try and get back to you."
"What good would you, joining the army and dying, do?" Benjie asked desperately.
"Brother, you see the news. You see what is happening there. The deaths, the destruction. You hear what they are saying about nuclear missiles. You remember what that did to the world in WWI. I want to try and prevent that sorrow from befalling our world. I want to wake up with the sounds of my children's laughter every day. I want to look through the window and see them play in the garden, see my wife scolding them to be careful as she hangs the laundry. I want that peace for them to last and it won't, not unless I fight, not unless I make sure that devastation doesn't reach the safe space I've created for them. The little piece of heaven I didn't know I wanted until I had it."
"Then let someone create a barrier around your home." Benjie tried bargaining.
"Benjie, you know I believe in living a life given to us, to live it fully until we are meant to return to the ground. Not to mention that I wouldn't ask that of them, not while knowing the sort of danger they have to deal with."
"Brother, please." Benjie begged, finally looking at him, "I don't want to lose you too."
Cole frowned, reaching over to cup Benjie's cheek as he asked, "Why do you say that?"
"Mel will follow, you know she will. She has this idea of having a family, and because of that, she will have an Amy and a Lucius in her life that she wouldn't want to become immortal, just like you. And I will watch her die. And Lucius, he too... he is dying too." Benjie shook his head as his eyes dropped.
"What do you mean? We just got him back." Cole asked with a frown.
"He is dying, brother." Benjie muttered, "He is sick. He doesn't have long to live."
"Benjie..." Cole breathed a sigh.
"I don't do well with this kind of thing. You know that. I don't think I could learn to live without you." Benjie licked his bottom lip as his frown deepened, "You know what happens to me when someone I care about gets hurt or dies. I need you there. But what will happen to me when it is you who dies, Cole? What am I going to do then?"
Cole pulled Benjie into a tight hold, mumbling, "Sorry, Benjie. Sorry, brother, but I have to do this. Please understand. And you won't be alone. You think I would have let you stay here if I thought that they didn't have your back. Benjie, you have Tobias, your biggest ally. You have Lazarus who was more a father to us than that bastard. You have Wyatt and Edmur, Noah and Blayth. You have Ren, who would battle the world for us, and you know that, even when she denies it. And everyone else. No one will abandon you as long as you are still alive, they will all be here for you. They are our family, Benjie, and to this day I thank god that I didn't refuse Lucius when he came to get us, because if I had we would still be living in fear, all of us damaged because of that filth."
"I love you, Cole." Benjie muttered, holding onto his brother.
"I know, Ben. I know. I love you too."
***
The days passed, Cole left for the war, Benjie having promised him that he'd make sure his family was alright by checking on them every once in a while. Noah spent every waking moment with Lucius, staying by his side, close to him all the time, until Lucius started getting too ill to leave bed, and even then, he was with him, feeding him, bathing him, whatever he needed as his body slowly deteriorated.
"He can't stay like that forever." Blayth muttered with a frown, looking at his brother lying down behind Lucius, with the latter sleeping against his chest, he himself dozed off. "I'm getting worried."
"I know what you mean." Ren sighed, walking up to the bed before touching her brother's shoulder as she said quietly, "Brother...wake up. Your neck is going to hurt sleeping this way." She sighed, pressing her lips when his eyes slowly parted, "Have you eaten?"
He groaned, shutting his eyes again as he breathed sleepily, "I'm fine."
"That's not what I asked." She grumbled as she stood back up. Blayth tried to smile but failed, going to the other side of the bed and taking a seat on the chair that was set there.
"L-Leon..." Blayth's eyes moved from his sister to glance at Lucius, his hand reaching towards him.
He took it between his own as he said, "It's Blayth."
"Hmm...is it snowing yet?" Lucius sighed, barely opening his eyes.
Blayth felt choked before he shook his head, replying, "Not just yet."
"W-Where's Noah?" Lucius stuttered tiredly.
Blayth glanced at his brother who seemed to wake up the moment Lucius uttered his name, holding him closer as he replied instead, his voice groggy, "I'm here, love. I'm right here. I haven't gone anywhere." With that he pressed a kiss against Lucius's head, muttering, "Do you need anything?"
"It's cold..." Lucius whispered, seeming to be going back to sleep.
"Blayth." Noah said, glancing at him, "Could you get more blankets?" Blayth nodded as he got up, going to do as told. "Lu, love, are you hungry?" Noah asked, shaking him softly to wake him up.
"Nah..." Lucius breathed, "Tired."
"Okay, sleep. But when you wake up you have to eat." Noah insisted, hearing a small moan from Lucius who went back to sleep.
"Noah, you can't stay in bed all day every day. You need to move a bit. Take a break, I will stay with him." Ren said.
"I will too." Blayth agreed, placing two more blankets atop the two already placed over Lucius.
"No." Noah shook his head, resting it against Lucius's as he closed his eyes, "It's all the time I'll get with him. I'm not leaving him."
"But brother, he's sleeping. He won't know." Blayth tried to bargain.
"It's me who doesn't want to go anywhere." Noah sighed, snuggling to Lucius, "Not until he breathes his last breath, I won't move."
"Noah, you will wear yourself out. At least eat. Go shower, because you are starting to stink." Ren argued, "You have to take care of yourself as well."
"I'm fine." Noah muttered.
"Noah, you won't be able to be there for him if you too pass out." Ren sighed, making him glance at her and Blayth beside her, seeing the worried looks in their eyes.
"A shower sounds good though." He said, watching them relax, "Would you take over? He needs to keep sitting up. His breathing becomes harder when he is laying down."
Ren nodded, slipping into bed next to him, holding her arms out as Noah slowly moved Lucius into hers. Lucius didn't wake up during it, not for a second as Noah got up, pulled the blankets to Lucius's chin before stepping back.
Ren saw Noah's hesitation, making her say, "Go, he'll be fine."
"Call me if anything happens." Noah said, adding, "Or if he needs anything."
"A shower won't take that long." Ren assured him, "But I will. Promise." He nodded before finally heading to the dresser, getting a few things then going to the bathroom for a shower. As he stepped in front of the mirror, he saw the beard that was starting to get thicker around his jaw. With a sigh, he grabbed his razor, lathering his face with foam before starting to shave. After he finished, he showered as fast as he could then went back to Lucius.
Ren was singing as he entered the room, her hand caressing Lucius's hair as she did. She looked up at him when he came out, gave him a soft smile as she said, "He seemed to be having a bad dream, thought it would help."
"You only sing when things get bad." Noah muttered as he slipped back in bed.
"How much worse can it get?" She sighed, glancing down at Lucius. "Why don't you sleep a bit? I will keep an eye on him for you. I will wake you up if he needs you."
"I..." Noah muttered, frowning deeply, feeling an urge within him, wanting nothing than to hold Lucius.
"Noah, you will be in the same bed. It's not like I am taking him to another room or anything. I will be right here." Ren assured, "Please, just rest. How much help would you be to him if you are too tired?"
Noah hesitated for a while before he said, "You will wake me?"
"I will." Ren nodded.
He glanced at Blayth as he asked, "You will stay?"
"It's not like I have anywhere else to be." Blayth shrugged, smiling at him softly, sitting back down, his hand landing on Noah's leg as he said, "Trust us, brother. We have your back, and his. Probably his more than yours." Blayth smirked, watching Noah nod with a sigh before slipping into bed. Blayth pulled the blankets over him as he said, "Sweet dreams." Noah yawned. He couldn't help himself from reaching over, taking Lucius's hand in his and kissing his knuckles before he closed his eyes. Almost instantly he drifted off, too exhausted to resist it at that point.
The next day as the sun was setting, Lucius lay in Noah's arms, his hand clasped around one of Noah's arms that surrounded him, keeping him warm as he gazed outside the window at the setting sun. "Noah...I want to get out of bed."
Noah kissed the top of his head before asking, "Are you sure you are up for it?"
"Please..." Lucius muttered.
Noah nodded, even though Lucius couldn't see him. He pushed the blankets away, Lucius almost instantly started to tremble. He gathered him in his arms, pulling a blanket over his shoulders before he got up, taking him towards the sitting area near the lit fireplace.
He set Lucius on the couch, but Lucius slid down to the carpeted ground, pulling the blanket around himself further. "Lu, the ground isn't comfortable."
"Doesn't matter..." Lucius muttered, resting his head against the couch's edge. Noah hesitated before he went to get another blanket, coming back to cover Lucius with it, getting a soft smile that he returned. It was so rare these days to get a smile from Lucius, and it made his heart throb to see it. As he sat down, the door opened, Blayth sticking his head in before he was shoved in by Ren behind him, making him glare at her.
"If I was sleeping, I would've woken up." Noah said to them when they started arguing, getting a guilty look from the two of them before they went to where they were settled on the ground.
"Why are you on the ground?" Ren asked.
"I am a slave to his command." Noah muttered, glancing at Lucius with a small smile, receiving a dazed one in return.
"So you are feeling better?" Ren asked with a glint of hope, frowning as she looked at Lucius. Instead of an answer, he hummed a reply. She smiled weakly at him, glancing at Noah who shook his head at her before going quiet. "Did you know that Toby finally beat Leon in a battle today?" She asked with a soft laugh.
"Really?" Noah asked unenthusiastically, "Interesting."
She nodded, "Leon walked out of there. Just like that."
"How come?" Noah asked.
"Leon said he couldn't take Toby's boasting." Blayth chuckled.
"Leon..." Lucius muttered, making Blayth's laugh disappear as he glanced at Lucius with a frown when he asked, "Where is he?"
"He will come in a bit." Blayth told him, even though he knew Leon was avoiding that room as if it was the plague. After Blayth's insistence on him going to see Lucius, he finally told him why he wouldn't. "I can't see him like that." Leon shook his head, "I just can't. Not again. Seeing him die is one thing, but witnessing him as he slowly slipped away is too much. I will break all over again, and I can't handle it. I just... I can't." But Blayth had been arguing with him for a week, and finally that day, without saying another word to him, the moment they were both awake that morning, Leon had told him he wanted to see Lucius. He was shocked at first at how he changed his mind, but didn't question it, even though Leon had stalled all day, he promised he'd go there after training. Blayth thought what changed Leon's mind was how he'd told him that Lucius was asking for him, that he'd asked about him every day, even if he was half asleep.
And as if on que, the door opened, and it wasn't just Leon who'd come to see Lucius, but one by one the room started filling with familiar faces. Leon stood at the edge of the couch, looking towards Lucius with a deep frown before taking in a deep breath then making his way to him, kneeling next to him before he muttered, "Hi."
Lucius moved his barely focused eyes towards Leon before a smile touched his lips, breathing, "Leon..."
"You look good." Leon said quietly, taking Lucius's hand in his own.
"I don't feel it..." Lucius mumbled, letting his eyes droop, "Sit with me."
"Alright." Leon nodded, settling down beside him against the couch, hand still clutching Lucius's who turned to his side, still leaning against the couch, eyes closed in light slumber.
"He moved from bed, that should be a good sign." Tobias sighed.
"He's feeling worse." Noah said, "His mind is clear for one second, and another he doesn't even realize where he is. He's still dying." Noah gulped, tasting the bitterness of the words that slipped from his mouth as his eyes lingered on Lucius.
He looked back towards Tobias when he felt his hand on his thigh before he said, "Sorry. I meant for what I said to lighten your pain, but I seem to have said the wrong thing. Sorry, Noah. I wish there was more any of us could do."
Noah glanced away mumbling, "Sorry for being unnecessarily rude."
"It's okay." Toby told him, "You get to be rude, even yell if you feel like it. No one will take it to heart, I promise. We are here, it is all we are able to do after all."
Noah nodded, still not looking at them. Conversation sprung around, along with laughter. It wasn't rare to see them all gathered around Lucius, since he'd stopped being able to get out of bed, they made sure to come to the room a few at a time if not all at once, sitting around, chatting, trying to lighten Noah's mood or take Lucius's mind off of it. Even as Lucius started sleeping more, they still came, claiming they knew he still heard them even if he slept through everything.
"We need more wine." Tobias said, shaking the bottle he had.
"I'll get it." Noah said, getting up, going to where he kept a few bottles in the room. He brought it back, where Tobias took a moment to cool it then opened it, pouring himself some more before letting the bottle be passed around.
Lucius's eyes parted slowly, seeing Leon smile at something Cylus was saying. He let his tongue run across his dried lips before he muttered, "N-Noah..." he saw Leon turn to him as he repeated, "Noah..." he tried to move, to turn but felt completely worn.
"What is it?" Leon asked him, turning his full attention to him. When Lucius repeated Noah's name, Leon looked over Lucius's shoulder to him speaking with Tobias. "Noah."
Noah glanced towards them, moving closer to Lucius when Leon gestured to him. "Hey, love." Noah said, wrapping an arm around him as he spoke, "You're up." He said as he pulled Lucius to his side, where Lucius's head ended up on his shoulder.
Lucius nuzzled his neck as he whispered, "I had a dream...you were hurt... badly..." Lucius said, his voice cracking.
"Shh..." Noah hushed, his hand tangled in Lucius's hair, "It must have been a memory. I am here now. You are fine."
"You were hurt..." Lucius said brokenly.
"It was just a dream, love. I am right here." Noah tried to comfort.
"Lucius." Tobias said, making Lucius glance at him through his barely open eyes, "Do you want some wine?" he asked, holding out a glass towards them.
"I don't think-..." Noah started saying when Lucius spoke.
"Yes." Lucius said, making Noah look down towards him, shocked by his response when he'd refused any kind of drink before. He saw the shaky hand he lifted to grab the glass, knowing his grip would falter, he reached for it instead, and held it to Lucius's lips as the latter's hand covered his.
"Slowly." Noah mumbled, his other hand still caressing Lucius's hair as he took a sip, ending up with him coughing as he choked on it. "Shh... it's alright. You are okay." Noah whispered to him until he relaxed against him again, asking him if he wanted more. He took another sip before telling Noah he'd had enough, only a little later was he asleep again.
"Does he always have difficulty drinking?" Cylus asked with a deep frown.
"It's worse when he can't keep it down." Noah sighed.
"He doesn't have much longer, does he?" Cylus asked before thinking about it, earning a slap to the shoulder from Ren.
"Don't be insensitive." She hissed at him.
Cylus rubbed against his shoulder before looking back at Noah, regretting his words when he saw the look on his face, "Sorry, Noah. I-..."
"You only spoke the truth." Noah said, his frown deepening as he bit his lip, then turned to Leon before saying, "You should have come. A few days ago, you should have come. He wanted to talk to you."
Leon looked away in shame, not wanting to admit his weakness. "I made it about me when it was about him." He finally said, "Sorry." With that he got up, about to leave when Noah stopped him.
"Come back in the morning. He might have the energy to talk then." Noah told him, making him nod before leaving the room.
"Good night." Blayth said as he got up to follow him.
Noah glanced at Ren as he said, "So it's your turn?"
"Fought him for it." She smiled at him.
"Ren, I don't need a babysitter." Noah sighed.
"I am here for Lucius." Ren said, even though they all knew it was for the two of them. That's how her and Blayth handled it, by staying the night, alternating so they didn't argue over who stayed and who didn't.
Blayth glanced at Leon lying in bed, the blankets to his waist as he rested against the pillows behind him, keeping him leaning up, arms folded tightly over his chest as he stared at nothing in particular. Blayth sighed, taking off his clothes until he had only his underwear on before tossing a few logs in the fireplace then climbing into bed.
He laid down, eyes on the ceiling for a moment of silence before he said, "He's just upset and needed to take it out on someone." He knew Leon wouldn't answer, not with the way he was feeling. He knew how Leon tended to return to his shell when he felt intense emotions. Lose being the one to trigger him, guilt was another. "Don't keep it all pent up or you will blow. It's alright to feel sad." Blayth said, "It's alright to feel like the world is falling apart. Like he doesn't deserve what is happening to him. To feel as if a rock landed on your chest and you can't move it..." Blayth trailed off, closing his eyes to take a deep breath. "Like you can't breathe. It's okay to feel, Leon."
It was a long few seconds of quiet that followed before the bed moved as Leon pushed the blanket away, moving closer to Blayth until his head was against Blayth's chest. Unable to hold them back anymore, he let his tears fall as he sobbed. Blayth cradled him close, whispering little nothings to him as he wept. When he'd first said it he didn't think it would be that bad, he thought perhaps Leon exaggerated, but he saw it then, holding onto the man who'd not cried so much since Lucius died the very first time, since the time he wept over his family's grave so many years ago, since Blayth left the mansion to avoid dealing with an angry Leon. He wept for hours before he was able to stop. Blayth stayed with him, trying to comfort him. He finally wore himself out, falling asleep holding on to Blayth, who held him back just as strongly. Just then seeing what Leon meant by breaking down all over again.