Jungwon kept reading the note over and over again. He even had forgotten about the insanely good cookies Jay had baked him.
He just couldn't understand how him being pathetic and crying in front of Jay could lead to that.
Comfort cookies and a friendly note.
Jungwon shook his head. Even if he didn't understand, he had been raised to be polite. He took his phone out of his pocket and started texting the freshly added contact.
Hi, it's Jungwon!
Thank you for the cookies, you didn't have to
Well yeah I did have to
Can I ask if you're feeling better?
It's okay if you don't want to talk about it
Forget I asked
Jungwon involuntarily smiled.
Jay was being kinda... cute?
Was it okay to think that?
Actually, it didn't matter wether it was okay of not. After reading Jay's answer, Jungwon put his phone down.
He wasn't in the mood for texting.
~
Jay sighed. He could see Jungwon had read his text. He could also see that Jungwon hadn't answered.
I knew it was a stupid idea.
Jay was sitting by his desk, with an opened textbook in front of him, as if he would be able to focus on homework right now. He crossed his arms and placed his chin on his hands. His eyes kept wandering between the different things on his desk until they reached the window.
He could almost feel the light breeze gently moving the branches of the tree in his garden.
However, there was something else.
No, someone else.
Jay stood up just enough to see the street more clearly. A young man was walking, partially hidden by the tree. Jay had nonetheless recognized the person.
He looks so beautiful, how is that possible?
I guess he left to buy some errands
Why is he so handsome again?
Wait, why is he turning?
THAT'S MY PATHWAY
SHITSHITSHITJQKQISHDNXL
Before Jay could process anything, he heard the familiar Ding Dong of the bell. Usually, every time he heard it, he could see one of his favorite idols saying that in a cute voice, but right now he didn't have time to think about that.
Right now, he had to deal with the fact that Jungwon was at his door.
~
Jungwon didn't even know how he had dared walking to Jay's house, and even less how he had just rang his bell. In any case, it was too late now.
The door was being opened and Jungwon's eyes met Jay's. They had never stood so close to each other. In fact, they were so close that on top of being absolutely hypnotized by Jay's intense gaze, Jungwon could feel every cell of his body being electrified by Jay's presence.
It was something brand new to Jungwon.
He couldn't even find words to describe it, only sensations and feelings.
He was overwhelmed, kind of upset, strangely fascinated and mostly, he felt his heart beating only faster and faster, as if his life was hanging on a thin line right now.
"Ju-Jungwon?" asked Jay, in what seemed an extremely difficult effort to speak.
"Jay" whispered Jungwon, unable to produce a louder sound.
They stayed like that for another ten seconds, apparently frozen.
"I'm sorry I came over, I kinda, I don't know, I thought that maybe you'd be okay if we talked?" said Jungwon without stopping to catch his breath. "I didn't want to text about this... I realize we never truly spoke before, so I do feel weird and stupid, but I thought-"
"It's okay" said Jay, cutting Jungwon before he finished digging himself a grave of apologies.
Jungwon seemed somehow surprised.
"Come in" invited Jay, with the hand gesture.
"Thank you" replied Jungwon, stepping inside.
Jay guided Jungwon until his room, and let him sit on the bed before deciding to sit on it as well.
Jungwon had brought his knees up to his chin, his arms circling his legs. He looked like a ball, kind of.
Jay had crossed his legs as if he was going to meditate.
"What happened?" asked Jay, extremely worried by Jungwon's position.
"I got rejected" said Jungwon after the minute necessary to gather the courage.
Jay frowned. Who could have rejected the smartest and purest soul on earth? He also felt his heart sinking. Jungwon had confessed to someone, and it wasn't him.
A thousand thoughts rushed through his head, none made any sense.
However, he knew he had to put his jealousy aside. He needed to be there for Jungwon, no matter the reason.
"How come?" he asked.
"My home teacher gave me a letter this morning. It was from KAIST" said Jungwon.
Jay frowned, he wasn't expecting that.
"KAIST?" he asked.
"Yes, you know, Korea Advanced Institute of Science and Technology?" asked back Jungwon.
"Oh, yeah, of course I've heard of it" replied Jay.
"They didn't accept me" said Jungwon, hiding his face in his knees.
Jay felt his heart cracking. Jungwon seemed so devastated by the news. Even though he wasn't feeling very proud about it, Jay also felt relieved Jungwon didn't have a crush on someone.
Now, it was the very first time they talked, and Jay didn't know how close he could be, but on the other hand, Jungwon was crying on his bed.
So he decided to come closer and somehow hugged Jungwon-the-ball the best he could. Little by little, he felt all the tension in Jungwon's muscles loosen up, and after five minutes, Jungwon had actually turned himself to hug Jay back.
Jungwon, who had never showed any emotion in front on anyone was currently crying in Jay Park's arms.
Once Jungwon's cries got calmer, Jay delicately put a hand on his head, fighting the urge to just let his hand go through Jungwon's hair.
"You'll be okay" he whispered.
He felt Jungwon shaken his head against his chest.
"So you like science and technology?" asked Jay, trying to get Jungwon to speak a bit.
"To be honest not that much" admitted Jungwon.
"What?" asked Jay. "So why did you apply for KAIST?"
"Well, it is the best university of Korea" explained Jungwon, as if this was in any way logic enough.
"What field do you like?" asked Jay.
"I've never thought about that" said Jungwon.
Jay was extremely surprised, but he let Jungwon take his time. After all, they were still hugging, so he wasn't going to complain.
"I think I like literature more" finally said Jungwon.
"So, why don't you study that?" asked Jay, trying to hide his happiness.
"Well" started Jungwon. "Cause that's not what I'm supposed to do."
Jay frowned.
"What do you mean?" asked Jay.
"Well, my parents-" started Jungwon.
"Are they forcing you to go to KAIST?" asked Jay, sounding a little more upset than what he wanted.
"No, no" replied Jungwon. "It's just that they never got to study at university, so I wanted to be accepted in the best one, for them."
Jay took a minute to gather his thoughts. He knew every word counted.
"Jungwon, I get that you want to honor them" he started. "But you are your own person."
Jay felt Jungwon stopping the hug. He laid back and planted his eyes in Jay's.
"You should pursue what you like" added Jay. "You're building your life. They will be proud of you for being yourself, I'm sure of it."
"But you don't even know them" said Jungwon in a whisper.
"Have they explicitly asked you to be the best at everything?" asked Jay.
"No" admitted Jungwon. "I decided to be the best for them, to repay them for everything they do for me."
"You don't need to enter the best university to make them proud" said Jay.
Jungwon seemed extremely shocked about that last sentence.
"Jungwon, they are your parents. They love you, and mostly chose to have you. You don't owe them anything" slowly explained Jay. "The best thing you can do is to to be happy."
"But" said Jungwon.
"When you talk about the future, what do they tell you?" asked Jay.
"To do what makes me happy" said Jungwon, slowly understanding.
"See?" asked Jay soflty.