I lie on the couch in my living room, staring up at the plain ceiling. I have just got off of work, & I couldn't be more thrilled. Except, all I seem to be able to do is lie here, feeling numb. Kristy didn't talk to me for the rest of the day, but can I really blame her? I would be upset if my friend was going through what I'm feeling.
That's when I decide to go for a walk. Some alone time in the city could do me some good, maybe. Propping myself up & off of the couch, I grab my blue, studded purse & sling it over my shoulder, seeing as it's a crossover.
Once I'm in the lobby, I see Dillon at his text, looking down at his cell phone screen. Walking over, I clear my throat, instantly catching his attention.
"Hey...going somewhere?"
"Just out for a walk. Should be back by an hour & a half," I say, hoping he won't ask about Hunter. When I got back from work, he was actually not here. I guess he was using the bathroom or something, but point being, Kristy didn't take it well so Dillon will sure to be upset.
"Alright- wait, let me look at you for a second.." He grabs my arm to keep my from leaving, & looks at my face. "You didn't get any sleep last night? Oh, OH." Realization dawns on him. "What happened with Hunter? Shit I can't believe I forgot, I'm s-"
"It's ok," I chuckle half heartily. "I'll explain later, I just wana get out." He gives a small smile as he nods, letting me go.
"It's ok, you can tell me later." I have a bad feeling he'll hold me to that..
As I walk out the doors, I realize I have no idea where I want to go. So I simply start walking down the sidewalk, thinking of the many places. The wind brushes my dark blonde hair back, & I rub my hands over my arms, regretting not changing out of my uniform because of the chill. A couple of blocks later, I find myself walking into the library. A genuine smile appears on my face at the quiet, peaceful setting before me. It's just like any other library, the front desk where you check out, the section for the computers, a print room, then all of the books. It's amazing, really. That they can keep track of all of these stories, I mean. I can't even begin to tell you how many of my high school textbooks I lost.
Scanning the aisles, I look for a good book. Then I see it. Black Beauty by Anna Sewell in a hardback edition. Smiling, I pick it up, remembering when Daddy used to read it to me when I was a little girl, about six or seven years old. I don't know what happened to his copy.
Dad. How I miss him, even though he had his faults, he was still my daddy. I wish I could hate him for cheating on Mama, but I could never hate him.
I could never hate Hunter if he cheated on me.
I sit down at a table & flip the book open, a bit of dust flying up, causing me to cough.
After reading a few pages, I check it out & begin the walk back to my apartment.
After a couple of blocks, I realize that I'm not alone. Peeking over my shoulder, I see a black car set on cruise a bit farther down from me.
My breathing begins to hitch as it's familiarity hits me like a bucket of cold water. A nice black car with tinted windows.. is it the same one that I saw a couple of weeks ago?
Quickly, I turn a block & begin quickening my pace while it's still back on the other street. It won't speed up, will it? That would just be too obvious.
I hear it's tire splash a puddle from farther behind, so it's on this road now. Things don't get better as I realize that this street is way too deserted for my liking. Making my pace look more normal, I access my surroundings. As far as places could go, this isn't the worst place I could be followed. There are a few little stores, but empty buildings with graffiti done on their walls as well. Turning another corner, I decide to just run. Air fights it's way to my lungs, & knowing that I can't keep this up, I turn down an ally. After seeing that no one else is here, I crutch down behind a trash can in hopes of being hidden.
After my breathing returns to normal, I take a moment to calm my still racing heart. Hearing a car go by, I can't decide if I want to risk peeking to see if it's the car or not. So instead, I wait a couple of minutes before walking out of the ally, checking both ways before I walk back to the route home.
Unable to help myself, I keep looking back to see if the car is following me. Eventually once I'm back on my normal route, I decide that I was just paranoid. Why would someone be following me?
I walk into the lobby to see Dillon still at his desk.
"Honeeeyyy I'm home!" I joke, watching amusement as his head shoots up. He smiles seeing that it's me, waving me over.
"Got a book?"
"Yeah," I nod, holding the book up for him to see.
"Ah, Black Beauty. I had to read it in sixth grade. Nice book." I nod in appreciation. Suddenly, his face turns solemn, making my heart drop. I got a bad feeling..
"Kristy came by earlier to tell me about you & Hunter. Lexi, what the hell are you thinking?"
"I'm thinking-" I begin, but cut myself off. "I'm not. All I know is I can't lose him, Dillon. If we talk about it, I don't know, what if one thing leads to another and.. he might realize that a long distance relationship is no good." His face softens instantly.
"You can't keep this up forever, Lex. You're not even sleeping because of it. What happens if you start doing stupid stuff?"
"This is all I got for now," I shrug as I begin walking backwards towards the elevators.
"I won't let you keep doing this," he says, looking me straight in the eye as I step back. I shrug before turning around to press the button. I know I'm being a coward, but can't I be scared every once in a while? I'm scared of losing the one guy who was there for me through everything.
*Liam Hemsworth is now playing Jason... so, he's only extremely hot...picture on the side..carry on xD*