— 𝐃𝐄𝐂𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑 𝟏𝟗𝟕𝟓
When you came to, the first thing you felt was the soft touch of someone brushing against your hair, your cheek even before opening your eyes. You tilt your head and lean into their touch, seeking comfort and melting into the warm that slowly seeped through your entire being.
Opening your eyes, the haze adjusting and finally coming to a clear, you see Sirius sitting on the edge of a bed, anxiously staring back at you.
Your eyes glanced over the soft warm glow that settled on the features of his face. Worry lines that creased his brows relaxed once he noticed you were finally awake. Sirius' smile showed so much relief that you'd almost think he was about to crumble any second. Your chest ached with wanting to wrap your arms around him, to tell him you were okay, and that being worried didn't suit his cheeky face.
But all you could muster was raising a hand to cup his cheek.
He tucks a strand of hair away from your face, "Hey there, princess. You were out for awhile."
"For how long?" You weakly ask.
Turning his head, his gaze searching for an answer on the floor, "Around a day and a half." He says hoarsely. And you could tell by the obvious dark circles under his heavy-lidded eyes, he hadn't slept a wink in that given time.
When Bane had you trapped around his grip and Sirius helplessly watched as the light drained from your eyes, he immediately made a break for the centaur. In his sprint to save you, Sirius transformed back to grab his wand, but Bane and Ronan were quicker to disappear back in the dark while Sirius barely caught you as you fell limp in his arms.
As soon as the Marauders had fled to a safer place, Sirius never left your side on the bed while James and Peter took watch over Remus. James was worried for his best mate and a tap on Sirius' shoulder from him momentarily snapped him back to reality. He offered to watch over you at one point during the night so Sirius could get some shut eye. But Sirius ceaselessly refused, and was left to float around in the pool of his thoughts once more.
He couldn't bring himself to retreat into the wallowing blackness while his mind solely focused on making sure you were okay.
Finally wondering where you were, you scan your surroundings to see you were in a place you knew too well and have visited quite often over the course of your five years in Hogwarts. You were in one of the rooms back in the Shrieking Shack. The sunrise had started to seep through the boarded windows as dust particles made its appearance under the light.
Images of the events of that night came rushing back as you slowly sat up from the rickety four-poster bed. You realise the Marauders had retreated to the next safest place they could think of without blowing Remus' cover who was still under the transformation of the full moon.
However, the sun had begun to rise and relief washed through you as you remembered it was a Saturday, and that there was no need to rush back into the castle.
"What happened?" You ask, pulling away as you slowly throw your legs on the edge of the bed to properly sit beside him.
Sirius swallows the lump in his throat as he places a hand over yours on your lap. Desperate to contain the echo of his cry begging for you to wake up from replaying in his mind, his voice came out surprisingly gentle but weary, "I should be asking you that. What did that centaur do to you?"
"He..." You pause, trying to make sense of what happened while the back of your brain searched for an answer among the books you've read in the library, "Centaurs are natural Healers. They could improve physical conditions just as much as they could worsen it." You let out a dry laugh, "Similar to getting stunned, he must've drained my strength."
"Are you feeling alright, though?"
You look up at him, letting your eyes meet clearly for the first time since you woke up, "I'm fine, Sirius." You muster a smile, desperate to reassure and ease his worries, "Where's Remus?"
Sirius nods in the direction of the open door, "Don't worry. He's downstairs with the others." Squeezing your hand tighter, he scans your face, eager to fill the curiosity that lingered in his thoughts the moment they entered the shack, "Y/N, that night while we were fighting Ronan—I heard you."
"Heard me?" You ask while you attempt to stand, only to let your legs momentarily stop working and drop you into Sirius' arms, "Sorry." You apologise, but your mind only wandered to the warmth of his hands around your waist and the distracting flutter it made in your chest.
Regretfully, you force yourself to pull away and meet the concerned look on his face.
It almost escaped your notice that Sirius hadn't used the usual pet name he had for you, and you wondered why the sound of your name escaping his lips left you breathless.
Finally able to stand on your own, you give him a final nod, "I'm fine, really. Just lost my footing, that's all. What did you mean by 'you heard me?'"
"I—Nevermind. We can talk about it later." He shakes his head dismissively. Making sure you were alright was his utmost priority than what he heard you screaming about when he was too preoccupied attacking Ronan. Grabbing hold of your hand, he leads you out the room, "Come on, they've been waiting for you."
By the time you and Sirius made your presence known in the small living room, Peter was unfastening the shackles from Remus, who had just turned back into his human form on the wooden floor. James was deep in thought on the other side of the room, leaning on one of the boarded windows with his arms crossed in front of him when the sound of your footsteps approaching caught his attention.
"I can't believe you guys can be so stupid." You immediately say without skipping a beat.
"Only figured out that now, have ya?" James rolls his eyes and pushes himself off the wall, "And no 'thank you' for saving your arse?"
You scoff at him, "I wouldn't have passed out if you guys hadn't made the jump on Ronan in the first place, James." You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. Clearly the two nights had taken a toll on all of you and as much as you wanted to argue, you just didn't have the energy to bark back at him, "Look, it doesn't matter who started it, we should've left once the centaurs came. You could've gotten hurt then I'd have to bring you lot up to the Hospital Wing."
James, who was now in front of you and Sirius, raises an eyebrow, looking at you then to a dazed Remus who was still getting his crap together on the floor, "But madam Pomfrey knows about you and Remus."
"But not you guys." You couldn't help but snap back, trying not to let the temper get the better of you. You steady yourself, "And me. She knows I accompany Remus, but neither she nor Dumbledore knows I could transform too. We could've gotten in trouble and I should've stepped in sooner but... I don't know what happened."
You nervously swallow, trailing off as you lost your voice from remembering the horror of not being able to become human again, "I couldn't..."
"You couldn't transform back?" Sirius says softly, finishing your train of thought beside you.
When you give him a sidelong glance, you could tell he was starting to piece things together. And your heart lurched, unprepared for what you'll have to do in the next few seconds.
James blinks wide-eyed at Sirius then down at you, "But you did."
You slowly shake your head, "Not at the time when I wanted to. It was only for a minute but it felt longer."
"Y/N, that Summer..." Remus murmurs hoarsely from the floor, jumping ever so slightly from hearing his voice for the first time since you entered the room.
He was shirtless, his bare chest covered in fresh scratches and old scars while all he wore was his torn brown pants that were long far gone from needing stitches. His hair fell to his sides, casting a shadow along his face. Dark eyes stared right through you, shaking you to the very core instead of the soft ones you always found yourself melting in.
The beat in your chest quickened even before he finished his question, "What did my dad tell you?"
James takes a step back, scanning your eyes to wonder what his best friend meant. Despite being the most arsehole and egoistic person in the group, James always prided himself in honesty. He practically bared his soul to his friends and they in return. And it hurt him to think that you couldn't trust them enough with a secret as important. It was a repeat of the time they found out about Remus' affliction.
James kept his gaze steady while yours clearly nervous, "Is there something you're not telling us?"
You held in your breath as you realised it was time to come clean. When your eyes wandered over to Peter and Sirius for help, a way to escape, you're only answered by the look on their faces that there was none; they were just as curious to hear what you had to say. And there you finally were — at the point of no return, a place where you deeply dreaded to be in. You hadn't lied about your secret but you never told the full extent of the truth either.
You let out a shaky exhale, finally letting go for a third time — starting from your first dream to your mother's letter. You never expected the words that spill out of your mouth to hurt like a thousand knives lodged in your throat.
And as you wove the tale, all you could do was hope. Hope they were still there by your side by the time you're done.
Mischief Managed