Want To Be Loved (Himiko Toga x Female Reader Story)

Puddle of Blood

(Tw⚠️:
-blood
-self harm)

Toga's p.o.v.

I wake up next to Buba and the tv replaying the same movie we watched last night. I get up to go brush my teeth and get ready to see y/n. The guys say goodbye as I leave. I walk to the dorms and see no one else is there. When I get up to y/n's sliding glass door I see its all dark and everything is on the ground but I manage to see her on the ground.

I rush in, "Y/n!? Hey are you okay what happened?" I get down by her side, "Y/n...you're bleeding?" I look at her arms. Oh no. Tell me she didn't. "Y/n! Hey are you still with me?" Fuck. I take out my phone Shigaraki gave me.

"Toga?" Y/n looks to me.

Her eyes look like she's been crying and tired.

"Yes!? What happened!?" I ask worried.

Y/n's p.o.v.

"Toga...why are you crying?" I look up to her.

"You're hurt." She starts to dial a number.

"Toga I'm sorry for being a bother..." I close my eyes and I feel her hug me tight.

When I open my eyes again I wake up in a different place. I try to get up.

"Hey, hey, hey, its okay just lay down." Toga comes to my side.

"Where am I?"

"I called the guys and they helped me bring you to the hideout. We managed to stop you bleeding." She looks down to my arms.

It makes me feel horrible.

"Please leave I want to sleep." I roll over to my side away from Toga.

"Sweetheart whats-"

"Please don't call me that."

I just want to be alone. She deserves to be with someone else. What good am I to her?

"Can you tell me what happened?" I stay silent. "Fine...I'll be back in a bit." She closes the door.

I sigh, "sorry."

I then go to sleep.

Toga's p.o.v.

Sako, Dabi, and I go back to clean up y/n's dorm room.

"What happened?" Dabi picks up some of the books on the ground.

"I don't know Dabi." I sigh sadly on the verge of tears.

Sako comes to me, "Hey it's going to be okay." He hugs me.

I start to cry in his arms, "How? I can barely make her happy. I just want her to be okay. I wasn't even there for her when this happened."

Sako raises my head, "Hey this isn't your fault okay? As terrible as this is to say Y/n has been dealing with this before you."

"But-"

"There's no 'but' this is something hard to deal with and the best we can do is just be there with whatever y/n needs okay?" I wipe my tears and nod. "If she ever tells you why this happened just listen to her and reassure her that we are here for her." He wipes the rest of my tears with his thumb.

"I don't want to lose her."

"I know...I know but just because she did this doesn't mean she was expecting death as the result."

Suddenly there's a knock on the door, "Hey...y/n are you better?"

Fuck it's Midoriya!

"What the hell do we do?" Dabi asks.

"Just ignore him." Sako says.

"We can't. If they see y/n is missing they'll go looking for her." I answer.

"Won't they just think she left?" Dabi says.

"No the front gate only opens if you have an ID card and it keeps a list of who has gone in and out. We took her out of here by the other way so that would be suspicious."

"Well now what?" Sako looks to both of us.

I look to the ground and drag my finger on the puddle of blood on floor.

I sigh sadly, "You guys hide." They do as I say. Let's see what these so called heroes want. I transform into y/n and open the door, "Oh hey Izuku." He gets a bit surprised for some reason.

"Um...are you feeling any better than last night?"

He knows what happened!? I should ask...no if y/n didn't want to tell me I shouldn't go behind her back. Now how do I act like her?

"Yea now just leave." I slam the door in his face.

That's convincing right?

Midoriya's p.o.v.

"What's wrong Izuku?" Ochako comes up to me.

"Y/n just called me by my first name. She never does that."

"Well maybe she just feels closer to you?"

"After what Shoto did to her? I doubt it."

"Oh yea...how's it going with you two?"

I sigh, "Well I'm still upset with what he did to y/n but he didn't act alone the rest of the guys went along with it." I look to the direction of his room, "But ever since we found out about y/n's mom I think he's felt even more guilty. Of course he still needs to apologize to y/n but I don't think he should take all the blame the others didn't stop him and I know he thought he was doing the right thing trying to protect me from her."

"Do you think he ever is going to apologize to her?"

"He knows he has to."

"Doesn't mean he will or mean it."

I look at Ochako.

"What? It's true."

"He will mean it. I know."

Y/n's p.o.v.

Shigaraki comes in.

"What do you want?" I face my back to him still in bed.

"I see you're awake. Look I know what you are going through is extremely difficult but in order to help you we need you to tells us how-"

"I don't even know Shigaraki," I cut him off, "I'm just tired. Emotionally, mentally and physically. So please just leave me alone."

He gets surprised by my answer, "yes. Of course."

He walks out of the room.

I should leave the hide out. I don't want to be a waste of space to them.

I get up trying to sneak out of the room they kept me in and carefully walk in the hallway. I feel a little woozy but I manage to find a window to sneak out of since the front door was in the living room. I open the window but end up passing out.