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valeria held ruby's hand in hers, she kissed the back of his hand every few seconds. "i miss your voice so much." she whispered as she carefully moved a strand of his hair away from his eye.
"the doctors say your gonna be fine so i don't know why i'm still stressing. i guess i'm just scared. i'm scared for you, for me, for us. do you think we'll be okay?"
"...you own my heart ruby," she said standing up to kiss his forehead, she then turned around to see oscar ready to take her home giving her a sympathetic smile.
"you nervous?" oscar asked glancing at his sister who sat in the passenger seat.
"how could i not be? i haven't seen him in months. well, you know what i mean." oscar was quick to reassure her, "don't worry everything will be good between you both."
"...thanks," valeria fixed her hair for the ninth time. "are you ever gonna let cesar back in the house?"
oscar clenched his jaw, she asked the same question once every day, twice if she was feeling bold. "he's our brother oscar and i know he made a mistake but-"
"enough! enough, alright. just drop it i'm serious." she bit her tongue and kept quiet until he stopped in front of the Martinez' family house.
"good luck." oscar said before driving off. valeria stood on the sidewalk giving herself a quick pep talk. about 5 minutes later she finally had the courage to go inside.
walking in, she saw mario being embraced by geny. she remembered the last time she saw him he was giving her and the rest of the crew a pep talk on 'how to survive high school' and none of the tips worked so thanks for nothing mario.
mario turned his head, his eyes growing wide as he saw valeria. "wow i barely recognized you. come here." he said bringing her in for a hug. "nice hair." valeria smiled wrapping her arms around him, "thank you, how is everything?" she asked.
"ah that's actually what i was about to talk about," mario let out a nervous laugh pulling away from valeria to face his parents, "i have a surprise for you."
"okay. tell us."
"it's, uh... it's... it's a really big one."
"okay, we're ready!"
"it's like big-big like—- like, life changing big."
"oh my god, would you spit it out already," valeria exclaimed.
"mario!" the girl felt her whole body heat up when she heard a voice that hasn't had the chance to grace her ears in months.
ruby dapped his brother up with his good hand and smiled, his eyes drifting off to see valeria standing behind him.
"hey."
"...hey," ruby took the intitive to wrap his arm around her waist pulling her into him. she didn't hesitate to hug him back burying her face into his neck. "i missed you so much."
ruby pulled away to look at her face. "wow. your hair? it's beautiful, the blonde fits you so well," he complimented.
"thank you. do you mind if we talk in private-"
"Ai, mario. stop with the theatrics! what's the surprise?"
"happy new year!" monse exclaimed walking through the front door, "did y'all know there's a pregnant white girl on your porch?"
"not a white girl."
everyone looked back at mario with either wide eyes or disappointed stares. "uh, surprise."
•••
"i'm so sorry about your recent loss. my heart goes out to all of you. and as a beneficiary of white privilege, these kinds of tragedies are, like, foreign to me. so on behalf of my people, i am so sorry for keeping your people down."
"is she deadass?" ruby turned his head to look at valeria with low eyes, "i hope so."
"are you high right now?" she whispered only to get shushed in return. the blonde haired girl rolled her eyes and tuned everything out as she stuffed her face.
•••
valeria was entertained as she watched mario get a stern talking to. "ever hear of a condom?" ruby walked over to interject, "yes. it's a thin rubber thrash worn over the penis during intercourse. mario didn't wear one. i need water for my cotton mouth." valeria offered ruby her water bottle which he graciously accepted, "mhm thank you very much princesa."
ruby tilted his head slightly and looked valeria up and down. his eyes settling on her chest. "is it just me or did your boobs get bigger?" he bluntly asked lifting his hand to touch one of them but stopped and let it hover, "...i did not ask for your consent, my apologies."
"ruby it's okay-"
"i want pie. you want pie?" he asked interrupting her to get the pie out of the fridge placing it in front of them and grabbing two forks, the pair immediately starting to dig into the strawberry pie.
monse and jamal walked up behind the pair. "we can see through your guys' grave front. it's okay if you're not okay. we're here for you. just tell us what you need. do you need anything?"
ruby perked up and nodded his head with a mouthful of pie, "some whipped cream."
"i got you, bro. imma get that whip-whip."
valeria put her fork down and rubbed ruby's back as he ate, "are you sure your okay?"
"Todos!" Ruby's father shouted gaining the attention of everyone in the house. "it's almost midnight."
everyone huddled together and ruby insisted on giving a speech, he hopped up and stood on the coffee table.
"um.. i know you're worried that i'm just fronting and putting on a good face, but i'm not. no, i'm not a victim. i'm a survivor. and i don't want to live the rest of my life in fear or with regret, 'cause it's a choice." ruby preached, "and everyday we can choose to focus on our gifts instead of our misfortunes. we can choose to... to turn out worst tragedies into our greatest blessings, and we can choose to love instead of hate. by the way, shout- out to whoever brought that pie. tonight, i want to look to my future, and not my past. tonight, i want to make every second count. 'cause tonight i'm alive and okay."
everyone cheered as ruby hopped down off the table and walked over to valeria placing his hands on her face he leaned his forehead against hers as he took deep breaths. "we're good." he reassured, valeria felt her heart beat in her chest as everyone counted down around them, she nodded her head and placed her hands on his waist. she was looking for that confirmation the whole night.
valeria saw ruby flinch away from her and start to pant, he gently moved her out of the way and walked past her.
out of instinct, valeria took a step to follow him but was interrupted by mario and amber cheering in her face and bringing her in for a hug. she watched over mario's shoulder as ruby started to sob and sneak his way out to the front porch.
