Not Over You

Come back home

Lauren was delirious for two days, I did get sick too, but not as bad as my girls. It didn't take a hold of me like it had done to Lauren. I got a little fever, and a bit of an upset stomach, but I was still able to help Lauren and Kamryn.

The third day, I woke up to Lauren staring at me. I had fallen asleep with her head on my lap. She watched me sleep and I kind of felt self-conscious. "How long was I out?" She asked.

"Um... about three days," I said stretching then I felt her forehead with the back of my hand. "The fever broke last night finally. You had it really bad."

She took my hand and felt my forehead her face twisting with concern. "You have a fever. "

I took her hands off of me. "Yeah, I'm getting better now." I said. I didn't want her to worry.

She moved to get out of the bed I started to help her. "No... I'm all right, I have to pee. And I am so sure you've seen enough for three days."

When she went into the bathroom, I went to look at myself in the mirror. I looked like hell. I took my hair out of the messy bun and ran my fingers through my hair. I took a peek at the bathroom, and Lauren was running a brush through her hair. I saw a lip-gloss on top of the dresser and I put it on quickly then left the bedroom and went to make some simple oatmeal to see if I could entice her to eat it.

She walked out to the kitchen and smiled. "Hey," She said sitting down at the table, a little reminiscent of Kamryn a few days before. "I just want to say thank you for taking care of me."

"I couldn't leave you here alone." I said softly stirring the oatmeal.

"Yes you could have, you don't have any obligation to me..." she said and took a deep breath as if that took a lot out of her to say. "Not anymore."

"Are you hungry?" I asked. She looked at me as though I had just asked her if she thought the sky was blue. "I mean, do you think you can handle a little oatmeal?"

"Yeah, I guess so... Where's our daughter?" She asked. Just as she did that Kamryn appeared right next to her.

"Momma you're all better!" Kamryn said hugging her tightly.

"Of course I am, you look good too, baby." Lauren told her. "Now could you do me a favor? Take the spoon from your Mom and make her sit down, if she doesn't relax she is going to get as bad as we did."

Kamryn did as she was told and sat me down in front of Lauren. "Tell Momma what you told her when she was sick." Kamryn said putting me on the spot.

I looked up at her from my seat, then I looked at Lauren. "Do you remember anything you said?" I asked

Lauren furrowed her brows. "I barely registered your face that first night." She said confused.

"Okay," I said glad that she didn't remember a thing.

"I do remember asking for a promise though... I don't remember what it was." She said looking past me as if she could see through the haze if she could learn more that way.

"Yeah... and I did promise something." I said, "and I'm sorry I broke that promise."

She focused her attention back to me. My lady is so smart, it didn't take her long to understand. Because there was only one promise I ever broke. "What are you going to do about it?" Kamryn put a bowl of oatmeal in front of her, and she smiled.

"Lauren, come home." I said softly. She blinked and thought about what she was going to say next.

"No." she took a spoonful of oatmeal and kind of tested it out. Kamryn put a bowl down in front of me. The smile she'd had, disappeared when she heard the word. She glanced at Lauren confused. Lauren waited until Kamryn got her own bowl of oatmeal to say, "Kamryn, go eat that in the TV room."

Kamryn sighed and stomped to the other side of the house. "Why not?" I asked, not even bothering to hide the heartbreak that caused.

"I need to see some real change, Camz. Because this can't happen again."

"What can I do?" I asked, I was kind of starting to get desperate.

"What we can do, is seriously make the effort at the therapist." She said finishing up her bowl of oatmeal. "You are not the only one at fault here, and neither am I. Apparently, therapy is helping a little. Lets do this right, so that this last."

I couldn't argue with her logic, and I noticed she didn't put it all on me. I so appreciated that. I reached for her hand. "I'm nothing without you."

She smiled a little, and then she looked so tired when she squeezed my hand. "Thanks for breakfast, now go get in bed."

"Are you coming with me?" I asked

She laughed and nodded, "I am ready to pass out."

"Get in the bed, Camz." She said seeing my hesitation after our little talk. "Nothing will happen, and you need the rest."

I blushed, "Thank you." I lay down on my usual side of her bed. She joined me but sat over the covers. Then I fell asleep I guess I was more tired than I thought.

When I woke up, I had an icepack on my forehead and I was alone in bed it was dark. I had slept the entire day. The house smelled like food. I got up out of bed, and I walked out to the living room. Kamryn had Lauren watching some teen show on Nickelodeon. Her head nestled in her Momma's lap. Kamryn giggled at something some stupid puppet said, and Lauren tried to open her eyes. "I don't like Robbie." She mumbled.

Kamryn giggled. "Me neither..." Then I was more interested. And so was Lauren, she sat up and paid more attention.

Lauren looked over at me, then she reached out to me pulling me on to the couch with them. "Remember we used to watch this with Sofi?"

"This is a really good show." I said watching Lauren.

"You whine every time I ask to watch it." Kamryn said.

"I don't whine."

"Yes, you do..." Both Lauren and Kamryn said. I looked at them with my mouth agape.

They laugh and I hit them both over the head with a pillow. "I'll work on that." I said laughing too. And we watched the rest of the show together. It had been so long since we had been together like this. I was going to make sure that I got to do this more often. "I think that maybe we need to go talk to about what we talked about before I went on tour."

Lauren looked at me, "yeah, maybe..." she put her arm around me and squeezed slightly. "We'll see where this goes first."