Not Over You

No matter what

It had been a horrible cycle of apathy and self-loathing for the rest of the week. Lucy kept calling me, but I continued to ignore her phone calls. I returned home that afternoon and striped the bed and didn't even bother to wash them, I just threw them away. This never happened. Camila would never need to know.

I hated myself for allowing myself to get that drunk. Yes I knew Lucy was my friend, kind of... Ugh, I'd never get Camila back if she found out. All I wanted was Camila. I stayed in bed the entire week... The next week I had to go back to work, so I just took my solitude and nurtured it.

Friday afternoon my doorbell rang. I looked around wildly. I wasn't expecting anyone. I walked to my door and looked through the peephole and froze. "What?" I whispered and I ran to the bedroom, and looked at myself in the mirror. "Oh god... think fast Lauren..." I said gaining a sheen of sweat on my forehead. I opened my active wear drawer and pulled on some shorts. I ran a brush through my hair and put it in a ponytail. I dabbed a bit of lip-gloss on my lips and I grabbed a towel slung it over my shoulder and headed to door and opened it just as Camila and Kamryn were heading back to the car.

"Finally!" Camila said a look of pure annoyance on her face.

"Hi Momma." Kamryn said, pushing past me into the house.

"Hey, not that I'm not happy that she's here? But what's up?"

"It's your weekend..." Camila said.

"I thought-" I started then changed my mind. I wasn't about to press my luck.

"What took you so long to answer the door?" she said hotly.

"I was doing a little yoga in the garden, I didn't hear the doorbell ring."

She laughed at that. "You don't do yoga."

"Camz, I'm twenty seven... I can't stay looking this hot without breaking a sweat."

She rolled her eyes and mumbled something about not having had the pleasure of being pregnant and having to work hard to keep the weight off. I sighed. I wasn't going to apologize for Kamryn. "Whatever. Next time you forget to get our daughter from school you loose your weekend."

"I thought we had swapped this weekend for last week!"

"It was your Birthday, Lauren! I wasn't going to keep her from you." She said, and then I remembered she wasn't really a bitch, I just made her that way.

I wanted to keep her here. I really did. I wanted to talk to her, and I wanted it to be like before, when everything was new. I wanted to tell her I still loved her, and wanted her and no one else but her. "Camz..." I started, and she turned to me. Her hostility back on her features. "Can we talk?"

"I can't, I'm meeting someone." She answered. "Maybe when you drop Kamryn back at home."

"You're meeting someone... Like on a date?"

"Yes Lauren, a date. I date. I'm single remember?" Camila said taking a protective stance.

"Oh..." I said annoyed. "Listen, I don't want Kamryn to be around your dates."

"Kamryn doesn't know anything about who I date, don't worry."

"Oh? So Shawn isn't your boyfriend now?" I said putting my hands on my hips. She blanched. She glanced into the house then back at me. "You might want to be a little more discrete about your intentions."

"My intentions are none of your business." She said opening her car door.

I ran towards her and stopped her from getting into the car. I pressed myself close to her. "Are you fucking him?"