Not Over You

I'll never leave

I drove around Miami for awhile. There were traffic backups everywhere. It was just as well; I didn't know where I was going. Some how, I ended up at the dance studio. I just sat there and looked through the windows. It was empty and I was glad. I needed to release some stress.

I did a series of spins as the music changed. Someone grabbed my hand and drew me into their body. My eyes were closed, but I moved against their body without opening them. We'd danced together before. Our hips grinding against each other in a seriously sensual series of steps that kept our bodies glued to each other. "Shawn, what are you doing here, I thought the studio was empty." I whispered.

"Sometimes I come here to write songs and to think." He said as I drew my head back as his hand grazed the length of my torso as he danced me around the room. "What's got you all worked up?"

"Lauren..." I said thinking about the person I really wanted to be with. But I also really wanted to hurt her by fucking the hell out of Shawn. I turned my head and kissed the man who, if you really asked me, only made me miss Lauren more.

"I can make you forget," he whispered. "Let me touch you." I ran my hands through his somewhat greasy hair and brought his lips down to mine. I better make the best of it. Shawn lifted me up and spun me as I straddled his hips. He moved his hand down to my ass and squeezed. I moaned as he walked me to the corner of the room where the camera couldn't see us and continued to kiss me deeply.

Camila, think about this for a second... I told myself as Shawn's hand found its way into my pants, I thought about where I really wanted to be. The pressure on my clit proved to have the opposite effect on me, than what Shawn had wanted. I became very clear headed. And in that moment of lucidity my mouth spoke. "Lauren..."

Shawn froze, and looked at me. I opened my eyes, and stared back unapologetic. "We're done, Shawn... I'm going home to my wife." He pulled his hand out of my pants and I pushed away from the smudged mirror. "Thank you for being there, but I was never yours to have." I walked over to the stereo and grabbed my phone.

"Are you serious?" Shawn said derisively. "She doesn't love you the way I do. She's probably already found someone new."

"Then I'm just going to have to take my girl back."

When I got back home that night. Lauren had taken Kamryn to her house with her. She left an angry note about how selfish it was of me to have Ally watch Kamryn when she knew Ally had little children and that what Kamryn had was contagious.

It was? I wasn't sick... but then again, Lauren was the one that had been cuddled up with our daughter. Which meant Lauren was sick. Oh crap. I got back into my car and headed for her house.

I knocked on the door a couple of times, but no one came to the door. I looked around her yard for a key maybe, but I didn't see anything around. Then I saw Kamryn through the window next to the door. She was walking to the sink with a cup. She had her phone in her hands so I rang it. She was startled and answered. "Hallo?"

"Is your Momma sick?" I asked.

"Yeah... I was thinking of calling 911." She said, "Should I do that?"

"Open the front door." I said to her, "I'm outside, I'll take care of her."

Kamryn ran for the door and opened it wide. She gave me a hug and started crying. "I didn't mean to make her sick."

"I know baby, come on... are you okay?" I asked she nodded and I heard Lauren wretch in her room.

I had watched her this week enough to know that I couldn't help her now, and that she was too weak to even ask Kamryn who the hell she was talking to, which is why she was loosing all contents of her stomach. "Take care of Momma please." She said as I helped her to her room and tucked her into her bed. Kamryn no longer had a fever, and she had an appetite, which was good, she just still felt weak.

"I will, I'm going in there right now." I said softly and kissed her forehead. "Go to sleep now okay? I've got this." I walked out to the kitchen and I could see she had tried to have some pepto, which she no doubt threw up. I looked at the table and her dinner was untouched. Two bites were all she'd eaten. This meant that she was throwing up bile. No bueno.

I had to see if she would drink some water, or I was definitely gonna have to take her to the hospital. I got some water and one of Kamryn's silly straws she and Lauren liked to buy and took it into her bedroom. She was bent over a wastebasket her hair covering her face. I put the glass down on the bedside table, she doesn't even know I am in the room yet so I watch her a bit before I touch her and inevitably face the fact that I betrayed her. I reach for the hair tie around my wrist and take her hair in my hand. She moans when she feels my hand in her hair. She raised her face from the downward position and breathed deeply. "Thank you." She said hoarsely

"Shhh..." I said taking her puked on nightshirt and raising it up over her head. Is it wrong that I am looking at my sick wife and totally getting turned on? She only had her underwear on now. I turned my back and reached for another nightshirt. I helped her dress in that and laid her back down on the bed. "Do you think you can sip a little bit of water?

"No.... no... I just want to die. Poor Kamz, I can't believe the pain she was in." She moaned. "My whole body hurts, my eye lashes hurt."

I smirked she was so cute when she was sick. She didn't get sick often though. "You need a little water, remember you made Kamryn sip. I need to make you sip now."

"Why are you here? You hate me, you're probably happy I am all laid out ready to die." She whined some more. But she sat up and let me bring the straw to her mouth.

"You should have stayed at the house." I whispered

She looked at me, and moaned in pain and reached to the basket again and threw up bile. Oh god, she couldn't even drink water. I laid her back and stuck the thermometer in her mouth. She was shivering so I covered her up and stroked her hair. "Can you call my Mom?" She mumbled I frowned a little.

"Baby, I'm here." I took the thermometer from her mouth as it beeped. It is almost as hot as Kamryn's was that first night. Maybe because she took off her clothes and had been in just a nightshirt when I got here. She had cooled herself down.

"I'm hungry..." She mumbled then she was asleep. I went into her kitchen and grabbed some frozen peas. She doesn't even like peas, I don't know why she buys them, but I was grateful and I wrapped it in a towel and placed it on her forehead. I checked in on Kamryn quickly then left the house in her car and bought a ton of the icepacks.

When I came back to the house, she was moaning, I think a little delirious, she was crying. "Shhhh. Baby it's okay..."

"You left me all alone." She cried to no one in particular. Just to the Camila in her mind, because her eyes were closed. "You left me alone, you promised you'd never leave me. That was what the vows said. You lied." My heart broke.

"I know I did..." I whispered softly. And I began to cover her with the ice packs from head to toe. Her cheeks were flushed furiously red because of the heat and I knew I had to take her to the point of near frostbite to get her fever down.

"You don't love me any more." She said.

"I love you, I'll never leave you again, I promise." I whispered in her ear and kissed her cheek.