°1•Past reality

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Hanna

“So, are you ready to tell me why you are here? You know you wouldn’t be here if she didn’t think it was in your best interests. Your silence will not help you deal with what has happened to you any faster. I assure you it is a safe place here. What you share with me will stay between us. Nothing will come out of what you say in this office.”

Is he for real right now? I’m not too fond of his approach. He doesn’t stop yapping. Does he think that if he keeps asking and talking, I will start to share with him? I can’t believe my sister wants me to speak to him about it. I don’t want to talk about what happened six months ago. It’s my business and only mine.

Great, now, just the mere thought of it. My mind goes to the land of memory on that day.

As if I needed a reminder.

Six months ago:

“Mr. and Mm. Parker, thank you for coming on brief notice.” Mrs. Miles, the principal of my school, tells both of my parents.

“What did she do this time?” My mother asks. I can hear the disappointment in her voice.

Great, another evening, I'll hear my parents lecture me. I fold my arms in front of me and sit back in the chair I’m sitting on while I think about this.

“She has been caught harassing Miss Hallway again. I’m sorry, but I’m afraid that since it’s not the first time she’s done this, I must suspend her for a week.

As my mother continues to speak with Mrs. Miles, my father, on his end, doesn't say a word. He doesn’t even have a single emotion written on his face. Which means it’s not a good sign.

Awesome!

I know what I did, it’s not cool, but in my defence, I have to do what I must to survive in this hellhole.

I’m at the top of the food chain here. I’m the captain of the Vixen, the cheerleaders. I’m the most popular girl in my school. Nothing, I mean, nothing will stop me from keeping my crown. I will do whatever it takes to survive in this jungle.

After we leave Mrs. Miles’s office, we get inside my parents’ van. I can feel the tension hanging in the atmosphere around us.

Hashtag, I’m in big trouble!

“You guys don’t know how it works around here. You don’t understand what it’s like to be in there.” I decide to break the ice around here.

Shit! The way my dad is looking at me right now, I really should keep my mouth shut.

“And you think what you did justifies your behaviour towards other people.” It wasn’t a question but a statement.

“Ugh. Whatever you guys know shit!”

Ugh! Me and my big mouth. I say to myself as I realize what came out of my mouth.

“Language, young lady!” My mother warns me.

“Careful, Hannah. I’m not one of your friends to talk to me this way! You need to learn to respect others around you. You’re grounded. No cell phone for a week. Give it to your mother. Now!” My father demands.

“I’ll do no such thing.” I stand my ground.

“Keep this up, and you won’t have it for a month.” He says while taking his eyes away from the road to look at me through the mirror above him.

“I hate you guys...DADDY, LOOK OUT!” I scream when I see a truck coming our way as I look to my left.

After that, everything is blank. All I know is when I woke up. I found myself lying in a bed inside a hospital room. My big sister is sitting beside me, holding my hand.

“Tess? Tess, where am I? Why are you here?” I’m confused as my head spins a little.

Tess jumps out of her seat as she hears my voice. She hugs me so tightly, which is strange coming from her. Tess and I never had a close relationship

“Thank goodness you’re awake!” She still didn’t let go of her hold on me.

“Ouch! Not so tight, it hurts.” I say painfully.

“Oh, sorry.” She removes her arms around me, sitting right back in the same chair she had occupied before.

“Where are mom and dad? Why aren’t they here with you?” I look around the room as if they’ll appear out of nowhere

That was the question. Why was she here and not them? Then she starts to cry. She wipes her tears with the back of her hands, taking a few breaths to try to pull herself back together.

“I have something to tell you.” I can hear the struggle in her voice. “You see, you, mom and dad, were involved in an accident….”

“No! No! No! Please don’t say it! Oh, please don’t say that!” I repeat over and over again, putting my hands over my ears so I cannot hear my sister.

“Mom and dad didn’t make it.” She can’t contain her pain any longer. Tears run down her cheeks. Tess brings me back into her arms, hugging me.

Everywhere hurts as she hugs me, but at this point, I don’t care as I welcome the pain.

I rather feel the pain than numb.

After the accident, I ended up with a nasty scar on my left calf that looked like a leafless tree. I limp a little with every step I take now

The person I once was is gone for good. I don’t care anymore about a stupid crown or cheerleading, makeup or whatever I’ve done before.

I want to be the person my parents would be proud of wherever they are. Oh, and by the way, my sister is now my legal guardian. Weird, right? I have to move to a town called Saint-Rock.

Before we leave, I have one last thing I want to do. Although my sister and I never see eye to eye, I’m happy she’s here with me with what I have to do next.

As I said before, I want to make my parents proud.

Nervously, my hand shakes like crazy as I finally press that simple button.

“You got some nerve to show yourself around here.” Tracy Hallway’s mom tells me when she opens the door.

“Ms. Hallway, my name is Tess Parker. I’m Hanna’s sister. I know you don’t want her to be here, but she’s here to talk to your daughter to make amends.”

“Mom, it’s okay.” Who knew that one day Tracy would be the one to come to my rescue?

Before her mother says another word, Tracy whispers to her mother, and I hear the words ‘it’s her,’ and Mrs. Hallway looks at me sympathetically.

Ugh, I hate when people do that.

“Of course, come in.” Her mom says as she lets us through.

So I did what I came here for. I apologize to Tracy for everything I did to her at school, especially when I bullied her in front of everyone.

After I left her house, Something in me made me feel a little better about myself.

We had a funeral for my parents before we left and decided to let them rest here where they grew up.

And here I am now. I'm sitting on the couch in front of the shrink my sister wants me to see that I don’t even like. I stare at the clock above the door as time passes, and I still say nothing to him, not a word.

Why would I?

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