and I stand with you

fourteen

When I wake up in the morning, Fred is already gone. He had folded my clothes, and left them on the end of my bed with a note.

Octavia
You looked beautiful when you were sleeping, I couldn't wake you. I can't wait to see you again. As always, you are invited to go shopping for school with me and George. Have a wonderful week. I'll write.
Love always,
Fred

His words assured me that everything would be okay, but the guilt still lived with me. Suddenly, now that Fred wasn't there as a distraction, I remembered that my mother was dead. My heart stung, and I got up from bed with my sheets wrapped around me, just to put on a large shirt. I realized I had no good comfy pants, so I tugged my shirt down as far as possible and snuck down the hall to Dracos room. I knocked quickly, and almost left when he didn't answer for a second. As I was turning away, he opened the door, letting me in. It wasn't the first time I had been in Dracos room, because often times we would sit in there talking and eating to escape the rest of the family.
"Good morning." He smiled, shutting the door behind him, looking down at my bare legs.
"Can I borrow some pants? I didn't bring any comfy ones." I tugged at my shirt more, trying to be as modest as possible.
"Yes." He swallowed, looking away from me and going to his drawers. He pulled out a black pair of sweatpants, and handed them to me. I quickly pulled them on, tying the waistband with shaking fingers. I wanted to get out of here without having to talk about what was going on.
"Thanks." I mumbled before heading out his door, shutting it behind me and finding my way back to my own. I crawl into my bed, craving to feel something other than numbness.

I laid there for hours, until eventually the darkness took over the sky. A soft knock came from my door, and my aunt slowly opened it and sat on my bed.
"Sweetie." She touched my side, and I sat up against the headboard to look at her.
"Oh, honey." She saw my eyes, sunken in, and the few tear stains that remained.
"I heard what happened," she grabbed my hand, "I figured something was wrong when you didn't come down for dinner, so - and you can never repeat this to Draco or Lucius - I called Molly Weasley and asked." This peaked my attention, and I looked at her intently. Lucius would have never approved of my aunt calling the Weasleys ever. She did this because she cared about me.
"So I brought you some food, and I know you won't want to eat so Draco is going to come and eat with you. You should talk to him, he might not understand but he is going to support you." She pulled me into her without another word, and I embraced the hug and held her tightly. As she left, Draco came in after her and sat next to me with his plate.
"What's going on?" He picked at his food as I just looked at mine.
"She didn't tell you?" I asked quietly, still not looking at him. He shook his head and I nodded.
"You should eat." He suggested. "Do you want me to cut the steak for you?" He didn't even wait for an answer before he took my knife and fork to cut it for me.
"My mom died." I told him as he cut my food. He looked up for a second, and I thought I saw something in his eyes before he looked back down.
"Were you close?" He asked.
"Not so much anymore. She went into hiding after my dad was arrested, and I was sent to live with family who hated that I was Sirius' kid." I told him the truth.
"She stopped writing a while ago, and I figured she was just busy. I should have known." I wiped away a tear that spilled, and Draco finally looked up at me.
"Hey, you know it's not your fault. You cannot blame yourself for this." He assured me, handing me my plate. Instead of making myself suffer, I ate my food with Draco in silence. He took my plate when we were finished and set them on one of my tables, sitting back beside me.
"Would you like to watch television?" He asked out of nowhere.
"You guys have TVs?" I furrowed my brows at him.
"Well, yes and no. I have a hidden one in my room, and you have one hidden in here as well. I figured it might bring you comfort to do some things you might have done with your mom." He told me, reaching down beside my bed for his wands. He didn't even have to speak, and the wall turned to show a television.
"Is there a remote?" I ask, and he looks at me like I'm crazy before using his wand to control it. A muffle television show plays, and I find Draco laughing within minutes. He tries to hide his amusement, but I see the smiles and the giggles in the corner of my eye. I shove his shoulder as he makes fun of one of my favorite characters. He was deeply invested at that point, and it was clear to me that watching tv was an escape from real life for him.
"Draco." I say quietly after a few more minutes of us watching the show.
"Yes, Vi?" He leans over to me.
"Do you maybe want to stay in here tonight? You know, just so you're not alone?" I ask, hoping he doesn't flip out on me for talking about him being alone.
"I'm fine, Octavia." He sighs, but I know he's holding stuff back.
"Draco." I say, but he doesn't look at me.
"Draco, look at me." I sit up on my knees and face him, grabbing his jaw with both of my hands to make him look at me. His eyes, as always, were tired. His grey eyes looked desperate for feeling, and we only held eye contact for fleeting moments, as if it hurt him to look at me.
"Talk to me." I said softly and it got him to look me in the eyes again. They were now bloodshot and welled with tears. I quickly got off my knees and sat as closely as possible to him, swinging my legs over his lap and pulling him into me. He started to sob silently, wrapping his arms around my body and clutching onto my shirt. I ran my fingers through his hair to bring him some sliver of comfort in this harsh, cold time. Even if he was alone, he would always have me.

I would always come back to him.