Letting Go

Amusement and Thoughts

Kane's POV

       As I do my workout throughout the gym, I can feel the constant staring of the soft man that works here.

       I try not to let my lips twitch at the obvious attraction he feels towards me, used to the stares and looks I get whenever I go to the gym, from men and women alike. Supers and humans the same.

        So I just ignore the look of the man that looks like he's clearly going to be obsessed with me. Though he's not my type, if he asked I would maybe fuck him. I've been so focused on gains and making sure I'm ready for my next fight, that it's been a while since I had a warm body against mine.

       I chuckle to myself as I let the rope fall form my grasp and place it back on the stand where it belongs, not wanting the annoying, drunk worker coming over to raise an unnecessary fuss.

      As I grab my gloves that I brought with me and got from my car, I slide them on and tighten them before I start working my way up into my favorite pace, my mind going at the same rate. While my hands begin to pound the bag in front of my lightly at first and then to the point that the bag is swinging harshly, I'm thinking maybe this gym won't be as bad as I thought.

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      Once my workout is done, I grab everything I come in here with and walk out the door, turning my head to see the man greeting some older woman. I frown a bit, thinking he was going to stop and ask for my number, but I shrug as I continue out the door.

       I get in my car and grab my phone, ignoring the four missed calls from my mother as I put on my favorite playlist and turn on the car. I slide my seatbelt across my body and and click it into the clasp before I put the car in drive. With both hands on the wheel, and my thoughts going about sixty miles an hour, I pull the car out of the parking space before I begin driving away from the gym.

     I look around the city as I make my way across town. The view here, whether in your car or on top of the biggest cliff I know, it's beautiful. Not exactly because if the sights, though I'm told New Haven and Faerie Land are both very stunning.

      No, the thing that makes this place so beautiful is the way that there's no divide anyway. Of course you have the different species and different races, but unlike where I'm from, you don't see that being used against anyone.

      Back home you can get shamed and ridiculed for months because you chose not to where a broach to Sunday Brunch.

      Not something I ever want to go back to. Just having the money that I do form those cold stone bats is too much for me. When I make it in the boxing industry, I will never be connected to them again, not even through last name since my sister is younger than me and my mom took on her new husbands name.

      All I have to do is make it to the finish line that I've been working towards for years.

      Once that happens, everything else will fall into place. And I won't stop until I get there.

       It doesn't take long for me to end up in front of my house, though the last part of the ride is no where to be found in my memory. I gather my stuff from the car before I turn it off and close it behind me as I get out.

     I walk up to the house that isn't even in my name, and turn the key in the lock, hoping my mom didn't take me ignoring her calls as an invitation to cone barging into the house that she's sadly paying for. Something that she never fails to remind me of, when I tell her that I don't want to go through her dumbass cookie cutter ideas of what I should be and do.

       Some people might say I'm being ungrateful. Those people must not realize that the woman who birthed me wasn't forced to do anything but breath and eventually die. She's not going to live my life so why should she have a say?

       Especially when before she found herself being a working trophy wife, all the shit and turmoil she had to go through.

       She may be scared that I'll end up like her, but if I go with her plan, I'll end up like my dad did before she left him. Empty, dead and broken down. And I refuse to let the woman take over my life only to end up like that in the long run.

      I shake my thoughts from my head as I enter my room and undress, my gym clothes sticking to my body a bit before I throw them in the hamper that's sitting in the corner of my room. Once the sweaty clothes are off of my body I make my way to my bathroom, immediately going to turn on the shower, not wanting to stay this gross and nasty for that much longer.

      Once the steam is billowing around the room and I snap out of my head, I go to step into the shower, immediately realizing when the warm water falls against my body.

       I let the spray fall against my face as I stand there, replaying the fights and feelings that always seem to drag me down when it comes to what I want to do with my life.

       When I reach for the soap, I can't help the voice that seems to be on repeat as it always so when things get too quiet around me. Silence is just a breeding ground for overthinking and insecurities. That's something you have to learn the hard way.

      My shower doesn't take long before I'm getting out to dry off. After I'm dried and smelling back to my usual self, without the sweat, I make my way to my room to get dressed quickly. As soon as I am, I begin to make my way out of my room and to the kitchen. I begin to set things up to make myself a smoothie, even as my thoughts run wild.

      As I fight with myself with the thoughts going on in my head, I  just pray that my hopes and dreams as heard and that everything falls into place so I never have to go to the place I call home, again.

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Whew I'm sleepy. Even though you won't see this until later, I'm about to get me a little more sleep before I wake up and write some more of this book. I'm hoping for 4-6 chapters today.

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Comments?

QOTD: What time did you wake up?