chapter 13: i should just tell him

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> Chapter 13:I should just tell him

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> Carson's POV:

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> Two days later I rolled over on my bunk in the tour bus. I had no idea where we were headed.The boys had just finished their concert last night now we were off to I had no clue.Hadn't been talking to anyone to ask.

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> I hadn't made a move from my bunk all day only when I had first woken up to pee. The rest of the time I lay in bed. I lay there thinking. Sometimes I wasn't even doing that. I really just wanted the pain and the hurt to go away.

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> I still didn't know what to think about the kiss. Didn't know how to process it. Didn't know if I should say something or not to Niall. I really haven't given him the chance. I've been avoiding him. Honestly I had been avoiding them all as much as I could. Niall and Zayn knew. About the kiss. Louis and Liam knew I loved him. Or maybe it was just Liam? I can't remember, all I know is that too many people know. Its going to get out. Hes going to find out. Some way or another. Someone is going to slip up. Then I don't know what I'll do.

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> I'd seen similar situations with people in school. They would tell way to many people who they liked and soon it was as if the whole school knew. It was embarrassing and traumatizing.

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> Maybe they would keep their mouths shut and I wouldn't have to see any of them again. I didn't like the idea. I would miss them all so much. But it would avoid drama. And possible rejection...well most likely rejection.

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> If it did happen I wouldn't see any of them again...Well not until Charlie and Liam's wedding. I know their not engaged, but I know they will be soon or at some point. Liam had to have been thinking about it at least once. Charlie told me they talked about getting married before. She told me she never thought he took it seriously.

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> They loved each other so much. You could see it in their eyes. They obviously did. Charlie always talks about Liam. Liam is always talking about Charlie. When they are together their all over each other. Which I suppose in some environments thats not a bad thing. But when you have a heart broken friend and your in public..its not so good.

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> You would always picture Liam to be one against PDA. But now when Charlie was around. They were almost always touching. Even if it was just hand holding. I guess I can't speak to much since Niall and I used to be the same way. Sometimes worse than them. Just all part of being in love.

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> The good thing about Charlie and Liam. They never had the relationship drama. They never had people making lies up about them, never had people telling them they weren't right for each other. Maybe the occasional fan but not many of them. Most of the fans loved Charlie. Always had. Even when we were both in relationships. She still got hate. But never as much as I had. I guess it worked out because I didn't stay with Niall. And probably would never be with him again.

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> I was happy for Charlie. I really was. She was happy with Liam. I was glad to see my best friend happy and in love. I was glad she had a job that made her happy. Her life was the ideal way to be living right now. She was lucky and I couldn't imagine how many girls were dying to be in her spot right now. I smiled at the thought.

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