Crossroads

Chapter 14

Lincoln nods his head, the same heartache I feel deep inside of me so blatantly visible on his face, his features looking almost distorted with how much he fights himself. "He did..."

His eyes burn so intensely into my own, I feel my whole body ignite from the sole heat in his irises. There's a question lingering in them. A question he wants an answer to, but is too afraid to ask.

And while we stand like this, just gazing into each other's beings like it's the only thing we need, like it's the only thing that keeps us alive and our hearts beating, I can't help but doubt my own existence. Because ever since I saw Lincoln on that bridge I feel like I got lost, lost in the river right beneath it, its current too wild to withstand.

"He also said I should move out of here..."

I don't know what happens to me right this moment, but something is pulling at my heart at the sole thought of Lincoln leaving this apartment. Just imagining this place without him in it seems so wrong. He's a part of it, by now. He makes it what it is.

"And what do you think about it?" I can't help but ask, trying to keep the emotions out of my voice, unfortunately to no avail.

"I think..." he swallows deeply before his voice drops at least an octave, "I think the sole thought of staying away from you shatters me, Mia." Tears are prickling in his eyes when he suddenly cups my face, his forehead resting against mine as he takes another deep breath.

"I can't stay away, Mia. I just can't..." he sobs out the words, and I can't help but place my palms on his cheek, lifting his head so I can look into his eyes properly while I brush the stray tears from his cheeks.

But when I do just that, when I gaze into those light blue eyes, I almost stagger back from the sea of emotion in them. Pain, grief, love, desire, and fear. They're all displayed in his irises, presented on a silver platter, offering his soul to my very being.

And it feels like an out-of-body experience suddenly, because I'm definitely not the one controlling my movements when I push Lincoln, his back bumping into the door behind him with a quiet thud. His eyes widen when he takes me in, obviously trying to figure out what the hell I'm doing, not that I know it myself.

"Then don't, Link." It's the only thing I manage to say, my heart thundering in my chest while I feel the blood rush through my veins. "Don't stay away."

He reads me intently, still trying to find the answer to that goddamn question in his eyes.

"Mia..." he whispers, although I hear the despair in his voice.

"I'm sick of it, Link," I interrupt him, "I'm sick of being rational, of being cautious, of doing the right thing... I can't fucking do it anymore. I want to do what I want to. People dictate my life left and right, and it needs to fucking stop. I need to live my goddamn life."

There's a hint of admiration in his eyes when he studies me for a minute, his hands moving down to my neck where his thumb rests calmly on my carotid, my raging pulse thundering against his thumb. But then his eyes slowly turn into something different, something dangerous, dark, and way too bloody handsome.

"What are you saying, Mia?" The low bass of his voice vibrates straight through my fingers, and right into my very being.

"You know very well what I'm saying, Lincoln."

His eyes light up like a goddamn Christmas tree when he registers my words, and I can feel the shiver running through my veins when his grip on my neck slightly tightens, his whole posture turning animalistic and raw.

"I need you to say it..." he's breathless when he speaks, his words would be inaudible if we weren't only inches apart.

And I can't help but smirk, just then. Because I'm done with it all. I'm done playing by the rules, done doing what everyone expects me to. I'm ready to be who I really am.