At Midnight

Chapter 13

The attic was cold and full of dust. I hid in a corner where the wooden boxes mounted on top of one another, containing useless and sentimental items, blocked me from sight. There was a small window that was covered with filth and spider webs. No one had been up in the attic for a long time.

I leaned against the wall and hugged my legs towards my chest, listening to the rhythm of the howling wind coming from the air ventilation. I tugged the sleeves of my sweater down unconsciously and stared at the dust flying around. Some of the light from the window shone into the pitch-black room but it was dark. I liked it. It was like I was in a trance, like I was in some alternative universe. It felt like I was floating in a black hole. Away from people.

The door creaked open and I could make out the shadow that was entering. " Mia?" Ashton said. My breath hitched and my throat tightened. He was the last person that I wanted to see. I kept as still as possible but he found me eventually.

" Mia, why are you hiding?" His face scrunched up in concern.

" Nothing. Go away." I covered my face with my hands.

There was a long silence, followed by a thump. I peeked through my fingers and saw him sitting beside me. He crossed his legs and leaned his head back on the wall. He was staring up at the ceiling for quite a while but I didn't get what was so interesting about it so I stared at it too.

" I woke up and you weren't there." He cleared his throat. I ignored him and continued looking up at the ceiling even though my neck was starting to get sore from all that craning.

" I was scared. That you left." He mumbled to himself. After my little fiesta, I fell asleep and Ashton slept on the chair. I had gotten up at some point in the middle of the night and chickened out. It was the first time I broke down in front of someone. I didn't want to explain to him anything. I never did. And I wasn't sure where to start. It would freak him out and he wouldn't understand and he'd leave.

The wind magically disappeared and I could hear Ashton's steady breathing. " I won't press. Tell me whatever you're comfortable with. But I'll still be your friend no matter what happens, Mia. You know that right?" He gave my hand a squeeze. I nodded my head, unsure of what he said. Unsure of everything.

" Can we just forget that this happened?" I asked.

" Nope. But we can talk about other stuff now. Like why you are hiding up here in the dusty and messy attic."

I laughed and punched his arm lightly.

" Now, now. No need for violence." He teased. I had to resist the urge to smack that smirk off his face.

" Well, I like the attic. Minus the dust and boxes." I stated.

" Why?" He lips quirked up into a smile.

" Its like my own little room of oblivion."

" Vague. Elaborate."

" Like I'm on Uranus or something. It's like my little escape. Like nobody bothers me here and I just pretend that the world doesn't exist. Well it feels like that to me." I explained.

" Like the hill near the Golden Gate Bridge? Wow, how many more hideouts do you have?"

" Just two. And you know all of 'em."

" As always, the pleasure is mine." He grinned.

The room was quiet again before he spoke up. " You like escaping a lot, don't you? You're really something, you know."

" Vague. Elaborate."

" You don't like the world. So you make your own." He shrugged.

" That's why we have books." I said in a mocking tone.

" Yeah, you like books. Its like you're a book yourself. Like a character and a book at the same thing." He exclaimed as if he figured out why the Earth was round.

" What?" I laughed.

" Get me?" He laughed, realizing how silly he sounded.

" A little." I grinned, " You suck at 'deep' talk."

" You too." He gave me a playful smirk.

" This calls for a trip to the tattoo shop!" I shot up from my position and pulled him along.

+++

Bill and Javier greeted me when I entered their shop. " Back so soon again?" Bill chuckled. The familiar musty smell was overwhelming and I tried my best not to puke on Bill's brand new Italian shoes. That man really loved his Italian shoes.

Ashton didn't ask about my sudden change of mood so I didn't offer up an explanation either. I had really been thinking about getting another tattoo that week and what better time to do so when you just had a mental breakdown in front of your only friend. At least it would get things off my mind for the time being. And hopefully Ashton's too.

" I like your style! Okay, I'll prepare the stuff and, you know the procedure." Bill gave me a wink before walking off to one of the rooms.

" You can wait out here." I told Ashton and handed him one of the magazines that where sprawled on the table. He nodded and I followed Javier as he led me to Bill.

" Didn't expect to see you so soon again." Javier said as he walked in front of me.  " Alright, in you go." He stood by the doorway and gave me a small push. It was probably nothing but when his hand touched the small of my back, I felt my back burn and I couldn't contain my grin.

Bill carefully did his thing while I sat on the chair, trying not to wince every time. In no time, it was done and Javier gave me a mirror to look at it. I beamed at the professionally done tattoo on my left shoulder. It was of an arrow through a diamond. It means courage and invincibility and moving forward.

I thanked them while marveling at my new tattoo. Bill left the room, saying his goodbyes, to attend to another costumer. " Courage huh?" Javier asked and sat beside me.

" More of moving forward. But yeah that too." I pointed out.

" Why?"

" Tattoos are like reminders, you know. I wanna move on." I shrugged.

" I tattoo attributes that I don't have on me."

" Same here." I smiled.

I made the payment at the cashier and tried to ignore Ashton who was staring at the arrow. Javier was printing out a receipt when he asked, nervously, " So, do you wanna, I don't know, maybe get coffee together some time?" His confidence was wavering a little.

" Yeah, sure." I smiled and wrote him my number on a piece of paper. His face lit up when I did so. He did the same and couldn't contain the huge grin that was plastered on his face.

At the corner of my eye, I could see Ashton watching us from the side like a hawk. He wouldn't stop looking and he eyed Javier up and down over and over again. His expression was unreadable. When we left the shop, Javier hugged me tightly and waved us goodbye. Ashton only gave him a curt nod and knowing Ashton, there was something off. Usually, he wouldn't be that cold. I tried to shrug it off and walked ahead of him to get to the car.

" You're not really going to go out with that guy right?" He asked out of the blue. There was a hint of distaste in his voice when he said 'that guy'.

" Its just coffee." I took the car keys out of my pocket and opened the door.

" But still..." He trailed off, not knowing what to say next.

" Its just coffee." I repeated. Ashton didn't seem to be at ease so I added, " As friends."

" Okay, but if he hurts you then I'm gonna go all big brother on him." He said in a tough voice and puffed up his chest.

I laughed. " Friends." I emphasized on the word again.