Confession | Laszlo Kreizler

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"I'm not sure if you should tell him how you feel just yet, y/n." My friend, John said as he took a sip of his coffee. "Why not?" I asked him curiously with furrowed brows. John introduced me to his friend Dr. Laszlo Kreizler about six months ago, and over that course of time I've developed feelings for the doctor. It wasn't just his intelligence or good looks that made me fall for him; it was his heart as well. He has such a kind, giving, and loving heart that made me soften towards him. "Have you forgetting what I've told you? He still isn't over his lost love and I don't want you to get heartbroken when he turns you down." He replied with with a serious look in his eyes. My friend's words hurt even though I did my best to try and hide that fact. 'How does he know that Dr. Kreizler would turn my down?' I thought inside of my head. But another part of me wanted to admit that John might be right.

"I know. I remember what you told me, John. I... I just can't keep pretending that I don't have feelings for him anymore. I almost blurted out that I love him the last time he and I went to the opera." I said with a deep sigh. I even felt my face heat up with embarrassment. This wasn't my first time falling in love, but it certainly felt like it. Laszlo made me feel a way that no one else ever had. Not that I was in any actual relationship; I've spent most of my life loving people from afar and I desperately wanted to change that. Mostly because the man who stole my heart is so perfect... well... he's perfect in my mind at least. John let out a deep sigh of his own and decided that he had no say in the matter if I had already made up my mind. Once we finished our coffee we said our goodbyes. He had to get back to work at the New York Times after all. Plus I hoped I could manage visiting Laszlo since he had the day off from the institute. I took a cab to his home and couldn't help but have second thoughts.

Deep down I wanted to tell Laszlo how I feel but I was also afraid that he wouldn't feel the same way. 'Come on, y/n. You can't keep trying to hide your feelings from him forever. He's an Alienist, he's bound to find out eventually.' I thought. There was always the possibility that he already knew as well. I tried to press my thoughts to the back of my mind after paying the driver. Then I made my way up the steps that lead to the doctor's front door. I rang the doorbell and was greeted by Cyrus, another friend of mine. "Hello, y/n. What brings you here?" He asked me curiously after inviting me inside. "I was hoping that I could speak with Dr. Kreizler if that's possible." I replied with a small smile. "Yes, of course. He's in the sitting room going over some papers at the moment, but I'm sure he won't object to a surprise visit from you." He said smiling as he lead me into the sitting room. Cyrus announced that I was there and Laszlo quickly got up from his seat.

"Y/n, what a surprise." He said with one of his cute smiles. His beautiful big brown eyes sparkled as well, making my insides melt. 'Why must you make me so soft?' I wondered quietly in my mind. We made small talk for a while before Cyrus returned to his daily duties about the house; those of which he shared with Stevie, a much younger friend of mine. "So, what brings you here?" Laszlo asked after he offered me a seat on his blue colored couch. "Well... I... there's actually something I've been wanting to tell you." I replied, awkwardly. "It's alright, y/n. You can tell me anything." He said after a moment of silence has passed between us. I guess he could sense my nervousness. Everything that had been pushing me forward before seemed to diminish now that I was face to face with him. I knew this was going to be difficult, but I had no idea it would be this difficult.

"Well... I... I know after I say this things between us might change dramatically. I just hope it doesn't change in the wrong sort of way." I started hesitantly. "Y/n. Like I said before, you can tell me anything. I won't judge you no matter what you say." He said with a sympathetic look in his eyes. 'Who knows what he must be thinking.' I thought as I hesitated a bit more before speaking again. "I know we've only known each other for six months, but... over that period of time I think we've grown quite close. And I... well... I kind of... developed feelings for you." I managed to say. My face was hot with embarrassment and my stomach was doing somersaults. I didn't dare look at him in fear of what his facial reaction might be. So I just looked down at the floor anticipating the worst. I heard him rise from his seat and walk towards me.

My heart skipped a beat when his loosely closed fist slipped under my chin, and he lifted my head so he could look at me. There was a softness in the way he looked at me; I noticed that his pupils were larger than usual as well. I expect him to tell me that he could never love me because his heart still belonged to Mary Palmer. But he just removed his hand from where it was and sat down next to me. I turned and kept my eyes on him this time even though I was anxious. "I've been trying to deny my own feelings for you for what feels like ages. You have no idea how happy I am that you reciprocate my affections for you." He said as he moved closer to me. "You feel the same way?" I asked, not really believing that someone so handsome could love me back. "Shall I prove it to you?" He asked as his eyes started to sparkle. When I didn't say anything he slowly started to close the distance between us.

Our noses gently brushed before our lips met in a tender kiss. I placed one of my hands in his chest and the other on the side of his bearded face. I was nervous about messing up, but when our lips started moving in sync some of that nervousness melted away. I focused my thoughts on his soft lips and how his mustache tickled a little. None of the dreams I had of kissing him could have prepared me for how perfect that moment was. When we eventually pulled apart I could barely look at him from the butterflies in my stomach. But once again he lifted my head up to look at me. "I love you y/n." He whispered. "I love you too, Laszlo." I replied blushing like an idiot. He smiled and kissed my forehead, making me melt like he always managed to do no matter what.

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A/N: Thanks for reading!! Remember to vote, comment, share, etc. :) <3

Watch The Alienist: The Angel of Darkness on TNT Saturday, July 19th at 9/8pm central time.

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