A Dance Of Blades and Hearts

we were ships in the night

Somehow I make it to the meeting the next day in one piece.

Our encounter yesterday left me feeling drained and broke my heart in my chest for the thousandth time.

I looked up at him, his eyes were resolutely on the minister speaking, jaw tense.

I noticed the eye bags under his eyes and my heart hurt, apart from that he looked perfectly fine, not a hair out of place, but all I kept seeing was him telling me not to act like I know him.

I wanted to talk to him.

No I needed to talk to him, but he wasn't giving me the time of day and I deserve it,

He wanted nothing to do with me and the thought left me feeling breathless.

But I wasn't about to give up on getting through to him.

I never thought I'd see him again, but he's right there and every part of my body wouldn't know how to survive without making this right.

It's okay if he still hates me, but I can't leave things as they are.

I think back to his uncle and lia hinting at him being sick 4 years ago,

They made it sound like he was for months and my heart hurts thinking about it.

watching him, watching the way his eyes gleam, the way his hair is held up with the crown piece, the way his face is still so soft but his features hard

I always knew, I never doubted it,

I'm still so completely and utterly in love with him.

But now he hates you.

A voice in my head says and I look away from him, chest tightening.

The meeting drags on and I'm about to tune everything out when I hear my cities name

I look up.

"Would the zethnan ambassador please address this" an ambassador says and I look towards him.

He's old, looks to be in his early 40s, there's a frown on his face that looks permanent and his eyes scan the room, jaw ticking.

And I realise I'm supposed to say something

"Yes?" I say raising my voice for the first time and all the attention in the room turns to me,

The ambassador looks towards me and I meet his gaze head on.

His gaze is condescending and I raise an eyebrow.

"Would you like to explain to me ambassador, why your city broke off the trade agreement with shenyai just 6 months into an agreement that was meant to be for 2years" he asks voice clipped, clearly annoyed and I raise an eyebrow

Before I came here,

LThe elders and some of the masters had filled me in on everything I needed to know since I would actually have to attend the meetings and defend our city if need be.

This particular topic, I remember quite well.

The entire room is quiet and the man stares at me, clearly waiting for an answer,

I narrow my eyes at him, everything else falling to the back of my mind.

"Zethna asked for two crate loads of archery equipment and only one crate full was supplied for six months straight with zero explanation, were we supposed to keep buying?" I ask voice calm and the ambassador stares at me, a little taken aback

"That must have been a mistake, the specification was for an entire population" he retorts, as if that explained everything.

I rose an eyebrow