11:11 (Poem Book#2) [Trigger Warning]

she tells me

She tells me of adventures
And how she smiles.
And how every second is worth while.
She tells me of how she is genuinely happy
She tells me everything.
And you know what, I'm happy for her.
And happy for you, even if it hurts.
Because life goes on, yes you are still on my mind.
But why wouldnt you be when you were so kind.
I'm trying to move on.
I hate the thought of being alone.
So I'm going to numb out my feelings.
Feel like a drone.
I still love you.
But that will never be.
But thanks for being there when I'm lonely.
I'm going to make a stupid decision
Because I fuck it I need to let go.
I just keep acting and acting
And I cant go on with the show.
I dont want to hurt you
But I dont know what to do.
If anything was genuine that the reasons that were given shouldnt have mattered.
And now all the hope I had has dreadfully staggered.
I mean if it were true
My parents, my age, the distance,
Shouldnt matter to you.
"None of it's too much"
You once said.
But she is better than me.
And feelings were left dead.
She tells me of how she can feel once again
Because you treated her like more than a friend.
I've done all I can, to try and grow.
And the final step. Is to let you go.