Cinderella and the alpha

Chapter 27

Chapter 27

"How are you holding up dear?" Mira, Ryan's mom asked.

We were sitting on the patio outside. She had noticed I've been silent lately, and I thought she tried to cheer me up by just sitting outside in the beautiful weather, enjoying a cup of lemon tea. We haven't talked much, but I know she genuinely cared about me.

"I'm...holding myself together" I answered.

"I know Ryan is worried about you" She answered.

That was no secret, so I just nodded; "I know. I am okay. I'm just thinking about something" I answered.

"About what?" She asked.

"About everything. Ryan told me how mate's where chosen, how in theory we're really chose ourselves, and lately that had me thinking of how my dad and Janine ended up together" I answered.

"Janine is your step-mother I take it?" She asked.

I nodded; "Yeah. If mom was still alive, would he still have chosen her? How could she be the perfect one for him when he himself was the kindest man? If the mate bond is really just like a small peak into the future of who you would've chosen, how could he choose someone like her? How well did I really know my own dad? I thought he was the only one who ever cared about me before he died, that was something to hold on to, but now I don't really know what's true anymore" I said and noticed I had started to ramble.

"Love is complicated, that's for sure. Despite how well we know someone, I think there is always a part of them we can never fully understand. And I believe Janine changed for the worse since she lost her mate. Did you know her well before your dad passed?" She asked.

"No, I didn't. But she was always...cold to me, and I wonder why dad just brushed that under the rug. When I asked why she was like that, he defended it" I answered.

"But you were so young. It must've been a complicated explanation and maybe not appropriate to tell a child." She answered.

That made sense. Of course, she hated me for reminding her of the past dad had before her, and maybe that in itself didn't define her as a bad person. She didn't act on the hate when my dad was alive. "I know I was a painful reminder, but she was no better. She had twins from another relationship too for god's sake" I erupted. "I feel like I can go back and forth on this forever, and it would never be crystal clear unless I could talk with dad face to face and that's impossible, so how am I going to let go of this?" I said frustrated.

"I think sometimes we think it's confusing because we already know the answer, the truth, but don't like them, so we make ourselves believe we don't know and that way we keep looking for something that doesn't exist, and if we don' let go, we'll keep looking forever with pain holding on" She answered.

"What do you mean, I don't even have an answer to this" I answered, pulling my eyebrows together confused.

"I mean you just hate the idea that your dad's soulmate, someone he loved, is someone you despise. I think there really is nothing more to it. His soulmate was about who was perfect for him, not you. And yes, while it is not perfect, I believe that it is the truth" She answered.

I chewed on the inside of my cheek, angry and upset. I may have been a little too self-involved on that, but it still hurt that she may have hit the nail on the head, but that doesn't excuse that fact that when he met her, he still had a family too and while you need to think of yourself, you also have to think of what was best for your family, and Janine definitely wasn't it.