Harry Potter One Shots

Remus John Lupin | Letters

I don't need love. That's what I keep saying to myself. That wasn't a surprising manner if it comes to a girl who grew up in a muggle orphanage after her parents abandoned her.

That was me.

I never felt any love, even inside the orphanage. They don't want me there, well, simply because I can do things they can't. I am what the muggles call, Freak. I've accepted that reluctantly. That was until I've received my Hogwarts letter on the day of my eleventh birthday. Without thinking twice, I did everything the letter said. And thank Merlin I did, because I've found a real home after that.

I got friends I never had in the muggle world. I studied lessons no one in the muggle world can even imagine. I got to ride a flying broom, and feel the fresh breezing air whip my skin.

I never felt so contented in my life. But I still lack something, I know that.

A partner.

I'm not rushing myself when it comes to that case, but I can't help the jealousy tugging at my chest every time I see my friends happy with their partners. All I did was watch them. It sometimes makes me feel stupid for doing so. But what can I do? I wasn't pretty. Smart, yes. But not pretty.

Others told me that I am pretty, yet, I can't put my mind to it and believe it. No matter how much I try, I can't. That's what I think of myself. Obviously, poorly. Yet, that all changed with just a single letter, written on the wall of the library. Hidden from everyone, unless you are like me who always hides in the deepest and darkest place you can find when you're finally tired of your boring life.

For me, it was at the end of the library. The last shelf covered it in the restriction area, which was the darkest part of the room at night. It became my sanctuary which I go to every night when I can't sleep.

Like tonight.

I lift the oil lamp I brought with me to the wall I was just leaning into. Squinting my eyes to read what was written on it.

"If someone's reading this... Congrats! I've wasted your time at something stupid."

There's no humor on it, at all, but I can't help the stupid grin spreading on my lips as I reread it. I even lift my finger to trace the letters, only to feel the rough and dusty wall.

Finally letting the stupid vibe spread in my body and using it as adrenaline, I hastily roam my eyes around the library to look for something I can use to write an answer on the wall. I didn't see anything where I sat, so I push myself up and silently walk around. Thanking Merlin that the strict librarian wasn't around, as I let out a triumphant 'yes'.

Quickly covering my mouth, I grab the quill and ink bottle that I saw on the librarian's desk and run back to the farthest end of the library. Sitting down on the cold floor, I dip the quill into the ink and start writing.

"You made my time worth it. It's amusing. Hello!"

Shrugging at my silliness, I get up from sitting and grin down on the letter I wrote on the wall, before returning the quill and ink on the librarian's desk. I glance back at the last shelf in the farthest end before I make my way out of the library and back to the Gryffindor's tower.

⚜----☘⚛☘----⚜

My journey to the library became constant after the second night. Something riled up inside me at the sight of the new letters written on the wall, just undermine.

"It's a pleasure to know that someone finds my silliness amusing. Hi, by the way."

I know it's stupid to feel happy with an anonymous letter from an anonymous person, but I can't help it.