Lover Boy

chapter five

When I arrived at school, I saw Connor Gleave. Except Alexander wasn't with him this time.

Unfortunately I had this gut feeling that something wasn't right when I later found out Alexander was no where to be seen. I made my way into the office and approached the secretary.

"Hey, do you know if Alexander is at school today?" I asked casually.

The secretary looked up from her computer and tilted down her glasses. "Last name please?"

"Uh, I'm not sure what his last name is.. but he's small, curly blonde hair." I said, I didn't know if that would help or not.

The secretary smiled a bit. "Ah yes, Alexander Anderson. He called in sick this morning."

I scratched the back of my head and nodded walking out of the office. Was he actually sick? I wanted to figure it out. But how could I?

Once again, my head began feeling crowded. My stomach swirled into a knot and tingles ran up my body, giving me cold sweats. I questioned myself as to why I possibly could have cared that Alexander didn't show up to school today.

Do I like a boy? No, I can't. Thats not who I am, there's no way.

I sat down on the wooden bench against the wall in the atrium with my head spinning in circles. Why do I feel this way? Why is this happening?

"Rich?" Ben stood in front of me.

I lifted my gaze up towards Ben. In the slightest, my hands were visibly shaking. "Hm?"

"You good?" Ben furrowed his eyebrows, giving off a look of concern.

With a short nod, I stood up from the bench and walked past him, not able to think clearly.

"Dude what's going on?" Ben continued and followed behind, quickly catching up.

"I don't feel well." I replied.

"Go home then."

I took a subtle deep breath in attempt to make the nausea go away. "Yeah."

Ben friendly patted my shoulder and took off somewhere else.

•••

Before the school day started, I went home. However the confusion and guilt never went away.

***

I went to sleep earlier than normal last night because of stress and exhaustion. I hated the fact that I had some sort of a non-platonic interest in him. Although I genuinely needed to know the truth, I could tell something was very off between him and his asshole boyfriend.

I walked downstairs for breakfast, my mother made pancakes from scratch. I sat at the table and put a fake smile on my face, picking up my fork.

"Good morning" I said as I started eating.

"Good morning!" Katherine beamed at me.

"Would you like a drive to school today?" My Mother asked me when she walked over to the dining room table and took a seat. Katherine usually got drives to school since my Mom didn't want her to walk alone yet, but I didn't.

"Sure, thanks." I nodded my head.

We finished breakfast and I went back upstairs to finish getting ready. I picked up a small container of edibles out of a drawer, took one out and put it in my mouth as I sauntered to my closet to get dressed. My closet was full of mostly darker pieces. I decided to wear a pair of black jeans with a dark, leopard-print knitted sweater. I then slipped on my dark red hightop converse and silver jewelry.