I listened to Something Rotten and Legally Blonde for the first time today and omigod you guys
Ha see what I did there—
In other words, I went on a Christian Borle spree, and it was worth it
•••
(RICH wanders around the party, clearly in a panic. He goes up to someone.)
Rich turned to the Squip. "Am I allowed to get up and leave?"
"No."
He scoffed. "Dickhead."
RICH (SPOKEN)
You got any Mountain Dew Red?! Ugh! (to someone else) You got any Mountain Dew Red? Gah!
Rich shivered as the Squip gagged.
(RICH runs off as JEREMY enters.)
CHRISTINE (SPOKEN)
Hey.
JEREMY (SPOKEN)
Yo.
Michael gagged, and Jeremy slapped his arm.
(He sits next to her.)
So, uh, where's your date?
CHRISTINE (SPOKEN)
Oh, he's upstairs fighting with Chloe...
"And I was in the right," Chloe spat.
Jake scoffed. "You were not!"
"Yes I—"
"Thut the fuck up."
And he's not my date anymore. I broke up with him.
Jenna cheered.
(RICH speed walks across the stage.)
RICH (SPOKEN)
It's like normal Mountain Dew, but red!
Rich snorted and Jake looked at him in confusion.
"What? I looked thtupid."
JEREMY (SPOKEN)
You broke up with Jake? Why?
(Beat. JEREMY realizes he's asked a pretty personal question.)
I'm sorry you don't have t-to—
The Squip groaned at Jeremy's stutter.
CHRISTINE (SPOKEN)
He seems like this confident guy on the outside, but underneath he has this whole other layer.
Jake frowned while Michael shouted, "Like Shrek!"
Rich whacked his head.
He was...sensitive and sweet. And the third layer was like this underlying total jerk layer.
Jake ran a hand across his head. "Shit, Chris. I'm really sorry."
Christine smiled. "It's over and done with. I'm over it."
JEREMY (SPOKEN)
I'm sorry.
CHRISTINE (SPOKEN)
I picked out this costume for him, and I've been uncomfortable all night.
"Hey!" Michael laughed. "A-and Jeremy was uncomfortable all day! Remember?! In the song where he was jacki—!"
"Yes, Michael. We know."
I mean, no judgement! If someone wants to be a sexy princess, then they should be a sexy princess! It's her choice.
Brooke, Chloe, and Jenna cheered.
