Study of the mind ➸ yandere x reader

Ch. 15

It hurts, the pain, is everywhere. It's so cold. My body feels numb. Why is this happening? Where am I? Where is everyone? My feet hit the cold, harsh ground causing a loud echo sound. With every step I take, the more it hurts. But I can't stop. I need help. But I can't talk. Where is everyone? It's so dark here. I think It's a corridor, a long, cold and dark corridor. Up ahead i see light, ever so faintly. Maybe there is someone who can help me. I try to walk faster but my body wont allow it. I can't stop, I can't move faster. It feels like forever before I finally reach the door. It's warm, I know it. I opened the door and am greeted with light and warmth. My feet feel less sore. I look around to see only one person. I try my best to rush to them and ask for help. I reach them and cling onto their clothes. 

"Please..." I start to say. My voice is so fragile and quiet. I wonder If I was even heard. The person turns around. I know him. But I can't remember. Why can't I remember anything? He wrapped his hands around my arms, squeezing tightly, as if to hold me in place. I tried my best to squirm out of his grip. I felt like throwing up. Wait this is familiar. I don't understand whats going on. 

"Stop moving sweet cheeks!" The man growled at me. 

"L-Let me go! You... you!-" 

"Shut up!" no, no , no this was all too recognizable. I know, but I don't know. UGH. This started to get worse, I wanted to be sick. I was going to be sick. I looked over to the door. Something was meant to happen, right? I know it. This can't happen. No I can't let this happen. Please, no no, NO, NO-     

-- --- --

"NO!!!" You sat up in bed screaming, gasping for air. 

"Woah, It's okay (Y/N), It's okay, calm down!" Once you had figured out what had happened you found your breath again. You looked over to see a shirtless Spencer sitting up looking at you, worried. 

"I-I'm sorry..." You said, trying to relax. 

"No, It's okay." He rubbed your back. "What happened?" He asked. You contemplated telling him. 

"J-Just a nightmare, I'm fine..." You said, still a little shaken. Spencer let out a sigh. 

"Come here." He softly demanded. 

"Huh?" You were confused. Then, Spencer pulled you close to him, wrapping himself around you, your face pressed to his chest. 

"It's still only very early, go back to sleep. It's okay, I'm here. You're safe..." He cooed. You felt yourself melt. His voice was so soft and silvery. You were glad your face was buried in his chest, because it felt like it was on fire, and you knew that It would look that way too. Spencer lightly stroked your hair and you tried to ignore the swarm of butterflies roaming around in your stomach. This was weird, right? We're only friends? Is this weird? 

Without noticing you soon feel into a comfortable, sweet sleep. 

--

Your eyes slowly opened, adjusting to the light you attempted to get up only to be very restricted. 

You were still nice and snug in Spencer's arms. Your face instantly changed color when you remembered. He was asleep, you could only hear his soft breaths. You relaxed again and fell into his chest, enjoying it for a little while longer. When Spencer did awake, he seemed to have held you tighter. 

"Good morning Bunny." He said in a low, sleepy voice. His eyes were still closed and he had no intentions of letting you go. You tried your best to speak up in a normal voice, but It came out much more soft and flustered than you had wanted it. 

Although you were both awake, you and Spencer stayed in bed, cuddling, for a little while longer. You were only hoping that in this time, your red, hot face would calm down so Spenser didn't notice. 

It was soon you remembered about the past events, you silently gasped. 'Idiot!' You thought to yourself. 'Something awful, no worse, has happened to Eli, and I'm laying here enjoying myself!?' You decided to push yourself away from Spencer. You didn't think It was fair for you to be happy when your friend had just been killed. Spencer finally opened his eyes and sat up. 

"Are you okay?" He asked. 

"I-I'm fine..." You responded bluntly, but nervous. You don't know why, but you felt almost mad at him. You knew It wasn't his fault though, and he was only comforting you. 

"If you don't want to talk about it right now, that's okay. But I'm always going to be here for you." He smiled. Ugh, he was so kind! So perfect! Wait- not perfect, like that... He's just, a really great friend. "Now, lets go get some breakfast." He said cheery, jumping up and offering his hand to you. You slowly reached out and took it. He helped you up out of bed and kissed your hand. You blushed and stood speechless. 'Why does he flirt with me like this!!' You thought. Spencer smirked, then took you to the kitchen. 

--

You took today off school too, you just weren't ready yet. You weren't sure when you were going to be ready. But It was nice that you weren't completely lonely in this time. Spencer was always by your side, always helping. Not that you'd admit it out loud, but you were starting to fall for him. But any thought about that you would harshly shove off into the back of your head and replace it with: 'he's just a friend.'   Fool. 

You and Spencer spent the day simply watching movies again. It was starting to get boring, but there was nothing else you felt like doing. Spencer was happy to do whatever you wanted, and even though that wasn't much, he smiled and you both did it anyway. You knew you had to get back to school and your own home again shortly, but for now you weren't thinking about that.

It wasn't long before you were in bed again, with Spencer close by your side. You were just hoping you didn't wake up breathless and screaming  again. You keep having the same dream and it truly makes you feel sick. You snuggled down into the covers on the edge of the bed, not wanting to get used to sleeping in Spencer's arms, besides, friends don't really do that, right? 

As your day come to an end and your eyes shut down, your mind did not: 

'Maybe I do like him...'