Love Is Not Enough | Chaelisa

Chapter 33

I thought I was happy before. I thought life couldn't get better. That my smiles couldn't be wider and my heart couldn't beat any faster. I used to think the butterflies living inside my tummy couldn't grow in numbers anymore, that they couldn't flutter their wings faster. Foolishly, I used to think, that I was at the peak of happiness. Oh boy, was I wrong.

All those things, all the signs of happiness and infatuation have only grown stronger. The mere thought of the precious moment that would be forever engraved in my memory, made the butterflies in my stomach awaken. And they were more awake than ever, with how crazy they've been going inside. It's like I couldn't focus on anything else other than the feeling within me at the sheer memory.

My stomach never seemed to growl anymore even if I felt hunger, my eyes never hurt from exhaustion even if was feeling tired. My nerves were always raging, even if I was calm in the safety of my room. My every sense seemed to be heightened, as I was painfully aware of every sound, every look, and every touch.

Not any touch, though. It wasn't anyone that made my mind go into a frenzy, that made goosebumps rise all over my skin even in heated weather. And even when I was alone, I couldn't stop the same feelings, the same reactions, from happening, as my gaze kept roaming the empty room, remembering what memories each corner held.

I couldn't sleep, take a picture, or look at the ones I already took without shivering. I couldn't breathe without my heart picking up its pace, as the sweet scent of strawberries entered my system, as it had lingered all around the room. I couldn't even put most of my favorite shirts on, without starting to giggle like a fourteen-year-old girl who just told her crush she liked them.

There was not a single thing that I could do, that I was used to doing, without my body reacting absolutely ridiculously. I wouldn't say it out loud to Rosie, not yet at least, since I didn't want to scare her away in case she didn't feel the same, but I was absolutely lovesick. I have fallen deeply in love with the blonde to the point I couldn't think clearly, rationally, at all. It was as if the left part of my brain ceased to exist altogether and all I had left was my foolishness.

One might think there was not that big of a difference compared to my previous behavior. Compared to the behavior I've been displaying for months now, but in reality, it was so very different.

Different.

A nine-letter word I used to hate, as they often associated me with it, as everything about my life screamed that word; different.

It was funny, actually. Ever since Rosie came into my life, everything was so different, but for the first time in my life, I didn't mind it. I welcomed it, as Rosie showed me that not all difference was a bad one. Rosie made different feel so good and even now when I was acting the way I was - having all these feelings on maximum, even though I thought I couldn't feel them more than I already did, it felt so amazing.

And all this, the foolishness, the complete takeover of my mind, heart, soul, body, my whole being started when she mumbled a simple "Yes" against my lips. It all started the moment she has agreed to be my girlfriend.

It all started the day Rosie Park became mine, and I became hers.

So here I was, replaying all the memories from a few days ago, clasping my favorite hand, looking absentmindedly into the distance. Because like the good girlfriend I was, I had to walk my favorite person to class. And of course, my mind was on her only. It was nothing unusual at this point.

Hand in hand smiles on our faces, we were making our way towards the brick building where I was accompanying Rosie to her music lecture. Of course, I couldn't go inside with her, but I would make sure she would get there safely. And even though it was quite pointless to go, as Rosie put it, I enjoyed it thoroughly. I mean, having the chance to hold my girlfriend's hand, be in her presence, even if for a few minutes, was definitely worth it.