Reality in Motion

twelve percent

"Figured you'd still be up." Steve heard Bucky's voice from behind him. A glance over his shoulder proved that it was him, standing in the middle of the doorway. His stance was a bit rigid and his metal hand twitched on its own accord, "Mind if I join you?" he asked almost hesitantly. Before, he never would've had to ask - joining him on the stoop without a word and taking a cigarette out of the pack Steve was smoking from. But that was during a time when life was much different than it was now. When it was just the two of them.

Silently, Steve gestured to the space next to him. An indication that Bucky could settle down next to him - which he carefully did. The open pack of cigarettes was offered to him, Steve having already taken one that he was currently, slowly, smoking. Taking one in his metal hand, he used his flesh hand to light it, then passed the lighter back to Steve.

This was familiar. Smoking together the night before a mission or an op. After their friends, the Howling Commandos, were all asleep post alcohol-induced-shenanigans, the two of them would sit by the dying fire and share a smoke or two. Neither one of them could ever sleep easy before a mission; Steve worried about the mission, Bucky worried about Steve. Conversation was easy between them, distracting each other from the op that would come with the rising sun. Settling each other the best they could in times of stress. Talking until their cigarettes were gone, about anything and everything, or absolutely nothing at all. It was practically tradition.

"Do all Hydra safe houses have stashes of cigarettes hidden around?" Steve broke the silence between the two of them, examining the cigarette that was in between his fingers. Whatever awkwardness was between them slowly started to dissipate with the smoke from their cigarettes. Bucky let out a huff of a laugh, then shook his head.

"Not sure, but these have definitely been here since the late seventies." he glanced at the design on the cover of the pack. He wasn't sure who had left the pack there, but he remembered having to wait at the house for extraction after a kill mission. The pack had been there then too. Steve pulled down the corners of his lips and then nodded,

"Well, it won't kill us." he was matter of fact before placing the cigarette in between his lips to take another drag.

"Do you remember..." Bucky started to try and pull the memory that was at the corner of his brain to the surface, "those hand rolled cigarettes that...shit what was his name?" he gestured to his face, "Mustache."

"Dum-Dum." he supplied helpfully with an amused smile. Bucky's eyebrows went up in recognition and he nodded,

"Right, Dum-Dum. He found those hand rolled cigarettes in Verdun and when we tried to light them -"

"They fell apart," Steve finished for him with the smile still on his face. Though it had a hint of fondness to it, especially apparent in the small laugh he gave at the memory, "And we weren't getting another shipment for another two weeks." This time it was Bucky who let out a little laugh,

"Really thought he was gonna lose it." he let himself remember the look on Dum-Dum's face when he lit the cigarette, only to watch it fall apart in between his fingers. The others, Bucky included, couldn't help but burst into laughter at the reaction. He had been so proud of himself, only to be let down so hard.

"He almost did." Steve reminded him with a quick raise of his eyebrows and Bucky let out another short laugh - both of them remembered Dum-Dum's loud cursing at how the Germans couldn't even make a cigarette right, "Can't believe you remember that." he shook his head a bit, ducking it down as he tapped some ash off his cigarette. Bucky took a pull from his, slowly blowing out a steady stream of smoke.

"I remember a lot more than I ever thought I would." he responded seriously; it was true. He never thought he'd be able to remember his own name, let alone things that happened over seventy years ago. But he did. He remembered things he wanted to, and things he didn't, "But there are plenty of things I wish I could forget." he added with a heavy sigh, taking another drag from his cigarette. Steve let out a noise of agreement.