Seeing You

Up the Creek

I finished my session notes and leant back into my chair. It had been a good day. My kids were all doing brilliantly and the smiles on their faces made me feel so happy that I could burst. I was so proud of them all.

My phone rang- it was Quinn.

"Pete! I'm coming home for the festival!" She screeched down the phone.

I held the phone away from my ear, "Indoor voice, Quinn. People all over the world can hear you right now."

Quinn chuckled, "Rory and I will be home in a couple of days. I annoyed him so much and told him so many times that the festival is brilliant that he caved. Thank god I'm good at nagging."

I smiled, "Great, I can't wait to see you Quinn. I'm missing you."

Quinn's voice softened, "Me too. Have you heard from Mac since what happened?"

"No. He hasn't tried to contact me and to be honest, I don't want to speak to him either. The things he said, Quinn, that wasn't the Mac that you and I knew. It was a totally different person."

Quinn was silent and I could picture her wearing an uncharacteristic frown and pulling her bottom lip with her teeth. 

"Quinn, it'll be ok. Don't worry. I don't know what's going to happen with Mac. I miss him but I don't want to be friends with someone like that."

"Friends? You're not going to get back together with him?"

"Uh..no."

I spun around on my chair with my back to the door and looked out the window. 

"Pete! What aren't you telling me?"

"I've seen Gabe," I begin.

"And...?" Quinn tailed off.

"I care about him, Quinn. A lot. I missed him more than I thought I was letting myself believe. Now, he's back and there's this feeling when I'm with him. He was there for me with Nan, he has looked out for me when I felt myself plummeting and I didn't know how to stop it."

I could hear the tears in Quinn's voice, "I'm so sorry I wasn't there, Pete. I'm so sorry I left you when you needed me."

"Quinn, please don't think that. I didn't want you to feel bad about this, I didn't want you to see this. I didn't want Gabe or Mac or anyone see what was happening and I thought I'd be ok."

"Have you seen a lot of Gabe?"

"Um.."

"No, wait don't answer that. Do you love Gabe?"

"I think I might?"

"Well that's a very convincing and solid answer," Quinn deadpanned. 

I burst out laughing, "I know."

"What about what happened at the party?"

"We haven't spoken about it. I think he has tried but I didn't want to hear it."

"I think you need to talk about this, I think you need to talk about everything if you do care about him. It can only get messy if you don't."

I nodded.

"You're nodding aren't you?"

I laughed again, "It's creepy when you do that, Quinn."

"That's why I do it."

I heard a male voice in the background talking to Quinn- Rory.

"I have to go, Pete.Love you and please, think about what I said."

"Love you, Quinn."

Quinn ended the call. I threw my phone on the table and ran my hands through my hair.

"Urgh..." I groaned softly and tried to think about what I needed to do. I need to talk to Gabe. I missed him. I let out a soft laugh, I'd seen him two days ago at John and Nan's cottage and we had parted with a lot left unsaid. I closed my eyes, I don't want to talk about any of this but I know I need to.

"Bad time?" I heard from behind me. 

I spun around in my chair and steadied myself on my table. 

Gabe was leaning against the door frame. He was wearing a white shirt tucked into dark blue jeans with black boots and a black leather jacket. His black hair was all rumpled as if he had been running his hands through it again and again. Gabe's eyes twinkled at me. I felt my stomach swoop. He was gorgeous. 

Oh balls, I was up the creek without a paddle in sight. 

"No. Not a bad time, I'm just finishing up actually," I said, trying hard not to squeak. 

Gabe smirked, obviously at my discomfort, "I wondered if I could take you out for dinner?"

"Like a date?" Yup, the squeak was there.

"Like a date, Pete."

I glanced down at what I was wearing. I had grabbed the first thing I could find out the wardrobe this morning; a floral wrap dress and red flats. I had pulled my hair up into a bun during the day. 

"Pete, you look beautiful," Gabe said. 

I blushed, "Gabe, you don't need to say that."

Gabe frowned," I don't need to say it, Pete. I want to."

I got up and grabbed my bag off the hook behind my desk. I turned around and my breath caught in my throat, Gabe had moved from the doorway and was standing close to me.

"Pete," he said softly as he reached out, grabbed my arms and pulled me towards him. My hands rested against his chest. 

He rested his forehead against mine and I could see the dark grey rings around the lighter greys of his eyes. I couldn't tell what he was thinking. I wanted to know but I was scared to ask. I knew Quinn was right, I knew I needed to talk to Gabe about the past but I don't think I wanted to. Not right now. 

Gabe tilted his head and kissed me softly. I closed my eyes and moved his hands up his chest, neck and threaded my hands into his hair. Gabe's hands dropped off my arms and wrapped around my waist, pulling me close to him, so close I could feel his heart thudding my chest. The kiss deepened and the room began to get very warm. Gabe pushed me against the desk and I perched on it with my legs wrapped around him. Every inch of me felt like I had been plugged into an electric socket, I swear I could feel the the small charges running up and down my arms and legs. 

We broke apart, breathing fast, staring at each other. Gabe smiled at me and I smiled back at him. 

"We need to go, Pete. I've made reservations for us in the city and, as much as I want to stay here and keep doing what we're doing, I don't want it to be like this. I want to spoil you.I want to make you feel happy and wanted.I want you to feel loved."

I felt a lump of tears form in my throat and I swallowed hard, "Sure, let's go."

I slid off the table and Gabe kissed me softly. 

"Come on, Pete."

He threaded his fingers between mine and gave my hand a squeeze. I locked up the office and we walked towards his car.

We needed to talk. We needed to figure out what was going on but for once, I didn't have the horrible whispering in my head. I didn't have the unsettling feeling of doubt and loneliness that occupied my chest daily. I climbed into the passenger seat and watched Gabe as he walked around the front of the car to the drivers side and I smiled.

I had Gabe.