Highly Inappropriate

39.

"Don't touch it!"

"Jesus I'm not, you idiot!"

"How bad is it?"

Now, the position I was at this very second was really compromising. I had no clue what I was even doing to be honest.

"I don't think it's infected babe, but the swelling is bad. Like really, really bad.", I informed, looking up to her from in between her legs.

Yes, I literally had my face in my best friend's vagina.

"I must say, I never thought I'd be getting such a good view of your coochie."

"Shut the fuck up Alex.", Jess hissed, glaring at me. "I can't even pee for the love of God."

"You should have thought about it before getting it pierced.", I smirked, bringing my eyes back at the swollen mess in between her legs. "Maybe I should drive you back to the shop so that the girl who pierced you could take a look at it..?"

"How are you even talking properly when it hasn't even been 24 hours?", she questioned, clearly annoyed.

"Hey, don't hate on me just because I'm no longer in the pain that you're in! Besides, my tongue is definitely less swollen compared to the size of it yesterday. I think I could go down on you without a problem.. wanna try?"

"You're gross.", she gagged, rolling her eyes at me with a playful smile, eventually getting up from the toilet seat and putting on some underwear. "You really think it's not infected?"

"I don't.", I breathed out, getting up from my knees to sit on the edge of my bath tub. "I'll tell you what though, if it doesn't improve by tomorrow morning we are going to get that checked out. Okay?"

"Fine, mom.", Jess teased while goofily trying to slip into her jeans. "So, now that you've gained back the ability to speak again, I guess you will have to embarrass yourself at lunch with Ashley's parents tomorrow."

"Shit.", I groaned, burying my face into my hands. "I haven't thought about that."

"You could always bail, you know? I'm sure Ashley would understand.", she suggested as I followed her in her room.

"I'm sure she would, Jess..", I trailed off, crashing on her bed and staring at the ceiling while she changed into her work attire. "But I'm not gonna bail on her. It's clearly important to her that I go, so I'm not going to disappoint her. I am shitting myself though, that's for sure."

"What's the worse that could happen?"

"Huh, I don't know.. they end up hating me? Bribe me with money in order to stay away from her? Think that I'm clearly not good enough for their daughter? I mean, look at me: I'm a twenty year old high school student with a not so shitty job, screwing my teacher, raising two kids, getting pierced without no actual reason and having literally no clue what I'm going to do with my life after high school. You're right, there's nothing unlikeable about me, everything's gonna be-"

My ramble was cut short as I felt a weight on my stomach and two hands grabbing my wrists, successfully pinning me against the bed as I looked up to meet Jess's warm blue eyes.

"Are you done?", she inquired, an amused smirk on her lips.

Was I done? Cause I've been constantly thinking about this lunch over and over again, mentally going through every possible shitty scenario that I could think of.

"Actually, I was just getting started. Would you please get off me, I'm having trouble breathing with your sorry ass-"

"Shut up and listen.", she cut me off, her grip on me tightening as I struggled to push her to the side. "It's okay not to have your life all sorted out, okay? Like, honestly.. given everything you went through, you're doing way too good Alex. You're doing great in school, you just got a promotion, you're raising two wonderful kids that love you to pieces, and you're generally awesome in everything that you do. And you know the best part?"