My Painful Love ❤️

33 - I want her

If a girl is ready to take her life than seeing you with other women then a man can never get a girl better than her. You yourself dug your grave and you yourself get laid in it"

Not even one per cent is false in his statements.

"You are right. I know I am at fault. She doesn't want to be with me. I just want to let her go.

I don't deserve to be her. I can only give her pain nothing else. I will leave her. Ahh ok? I will leave her. Let her live happily. She can't be happy with me. I will let her go.

I will sign the divorce papers she left" I said.

She deserves happiness which I can't ever give her.

"Adi do you love her?"

"My answer would be a simple yes if you asked me before our marriage but after marriage the more I tried to hate her, the more I fall in love with her. Yes, I don't just love her, I love her to the square of infinity" I said truthfully.

"Then why the hell you do this to her man? You had a second opportunity to gain everything in your life"

"You can't understand my situation, Rahul, I tried a lot to be with her forgetting everything, but I don't know what pulled me back jealousy or anger or love, I just don't know. It makes me want to hate her.

My mistakes are not acceptable even I justify them. So it's better to leave her" I said with a pain in my heart which is increasing every second thinking of leaving her.

"What the hell are you speaking man? Are you in your senses? Speaking like a stupid.

Just because you did a mistake doesn't mean you have to leave her. Your mistake is unjustifiable. Yet you should not give up so easily. Try harder, try daily or should I say try to win her trust each and every moment.

Let's assume you leave her now. What will you answer to her if she asks you, 'why did you give up so easily?' in future?

Don't let her go so easily. Fight for your love"

I am in a disturbed mood, what should I do? Should I leave her or want to gain her forgiveness?

Can I live without her? I can't think it's possible as living with her these days. Even this one week feels like hell without her.

But she is not ready to forgive me. How can she forgive a man like me so quickly? My sins cannot be forgiven in a single day.

Rahul is right, I have to win her. I want my Jaan in my life.

"Choose wisely man"

"I will win her heart," I said sure with a smile on my face, which is determined to win her at the situation. I will make you mine Jaan with heart, body and soul. I don't want to lose in this oath.

This oath will make our life happy Jaan, I promise you.

"Thanks, daa, I will keep on trying to win her back. But a simple piece of advice for you, never be with another woman when you find your girl" I laughed out seeing him.

His face shows terror and fear. Hahaha, fear of being with women.

"No, I will never ever be with a woman. I will die being a bachelor rather than married. See now how you are, smitten by your wife. Waiting to see you with you being roaming around your wife like a lost puppy"

He said laughing loudly.

"Adi even the thought is making me laugh harder" he laughed. But I don't see any joke in it. Why the hell is this idiot is laughing like a mad man?

"You know, I will witness a day where you will be worst than me. Wait and watch you, idiot, monkey "

"Let's see" he winked at me.

"Ok give me one of your car keys, I will give it to my driver"

"You walked from your parent's house?" He asked shocked.

"Why are you shocked? It's not a big deal. Give me or I will take your baby bike" I said smirking.

"Fucking hell no. Take all my cars, not my bike"

"Ok then give me your hot babe"

He throws me his red BMW concept 4 car.

I open the door to get in and ignited the engine and hit on the road.

Again Janvi came to my thoughts again.

What should I do to gain her forgiveness?

I have never asked forgiveness except for my mom, but how can I do it? I don't know anything regarding those things.

I can't even ask anyone about it. This Rahul idiot is not even useful in this matter.

Shall I surf the internet about this? Yes, that's the only way to know something. I will do that once I reach home.

Soon I reached home and asked my driver to give Rahul's car to him back. I went inside the house.

"Sir" a faint voice stopped me in my tracks.

I saw our chef standing there with a small smile.

"Sir where is Janvi?"

Here she comes again. Even if I tried to keep you away for a minute you again come to be Jaan. What can I do?

"At my parents"

"Ohh" she gave a sad smile.

"I haven't seen her for a week. That's why sir" she said.

I nodded.

"Sir, can I arrange food for you?"

"No, it's ok I am not hungry"

"But sir you are not having food properly. If Janvi came to know about this then she will definitely scold me" she laughed.

Why are you too good Jaan? Do I really deserve you? Your innocence?

"You know sir, she always cooks too careful for you. She takes care of and everything for you. I didn't get a chance to say these to you. She always wants fresh vegetables to cook for you. I will buy everything each day. She changed our kitchen and our habits. She even cooks for all our workers someday. No one can be like Janvi. She is really something which we rarely can see. You are lucky to have someone like her sir. She resembles a lot like your mom in love. I want her to be happy every day of her life. Please take care of her sir. These days she became like a daughter to me" tears started flowing in her eyes with every sentence she spoke.

"I had worked for many people's so far, but she is not them. They treat workers like slave people's. Janvi had never treated us like that, she had always been polite to us. But sir don't get me wrong. She never smiled. There is something big which she lacks"

Yes, I have never seen my jaan happy, it's been nearly 7 years since I have seen her smile.

'You are the reason' mocked my mind and heart.

I nodded to her and walked to my room taking my drinks and glass. My pain is not subsiding. It's like my heart is being ripped off my body. I clutched my chest through my t-shirt not bearing it.

I should do something to get her back. I want my Jaan back to me. I want her to be with me to laugh, cry and fight. I want her.