Undead

Acceptance (329)

CARL'S POV.

I sit on the steps of my porch and close my eyes, trying to escape the sight of our community in flames, but the strong smell of smoke fills my nostrils, not granting my the few seconds of peace I wanted to feel.

The saviors have gone and we fought well but we've still lost people, I know we have. We have to wait for the smoke to rise before we find out who else died and I dread that moment because I don't want to see any more familiar faces.

I'm still trying to process the events of tonight...or last night, I guess. The people we lost, our family crumbles more and more everyday. I try to ignore the pain in my chest but it keeps finding a way to resurface. That's not even the painful part. It's the memories of when I was young and the people I grew up with and now...
It only takes a second for everything to change.

The sun is starting to rise again and light shines through the misty air, shining straight through the smoke like a bright laser.  I didn't find dad like I had planned after leaving Madison but I found people along the way. Michonne, Beth, Tara, Jenna, even Fangs. Though the thought of Fangs without Madison shakes me to the core and I can't shake the feeling that something horrible has happened.
But now I sit on these steps alone. Somehow we got separated from each other and we never found our way back.

My heart accelerates the more I think of Madison and our daughter and Judith. I even wonder about Kai, I don't like him much, but I don't wish him dead. The thought of something bad happening to them loop over and over in my head.

I know I should be more focused and more worried about what's happened here, right here in our own home. It's in shambles but I can't ignore the voice inside me that's screaming, something's not right.

I look up, finally opening my eyes. I rub my hands against my jeans, rubbing off my opponents blood and taking out my knife as I stand to my feet. I start to walk through the smoke, heading towards the shouting and screaming of other families searching for one another.  The sound of pain in the air as children cry, searching for their parents and mother's howl in pain over their baby's body's. It's not right. This wasn't how it was supposed to be.

I listen out for my name but I hear nothing. In the distance I hear whispers and I follow them cautiously, lifting my gun, I aim it in front of me into nothing but smoke. Eventually, I figure out that I've made it to the infirmary.

"Carl? Is that you?" I hear a familiar voice.
"Jenna?" I start running towards the lit up porch. I feel her run into me, wrapping her arms around me. Her shoulders start to shake and it takes me a minute to realize that she's crying.
I rub her back. "We're okay." I assure her. She nods and pulls away, looking at me. "Oh my god! I thought after... I thought something happened to you. You were there one minute and then the next..."

While she's talking I notice a cut on her forehead which flows blood down her face. She holds a cloth against it and winces. Her hands are equally drenched in the sticky substance. Red is everywhere.

"What are you doing ? Go inside, you need help." I grab her hands, guiding her inside but she stops.
"Carl... there's people in there that need help more than I do."
I feel uneasy about the way she said that. "Who?" I ask.
She shrugs. "I don't know but...it doesn't look good. I'll hang tight, don't worry about me."
I can't help but worry about her.

"Where's Rick?" She changes the subject.
"I don't know... have you seen anyone else?"
She nods. "I seen Tara, Michonne and Jesus run for the church. I'd bet they're still there."
"Michonne is okay?"
She nods with a sheepish smile and I sigh in relief, leaning against her.

I need to go. I need to find dad. I wrap my arms around her and she rests her head against my shoulder.
"This is gonna be okay, we'll be okay." She assures me this time.
"You don't know that." I whisper as I close my eyes, I can just see one face. Madison. Where is she? Where are Kara and Judith?
"No, I do." She pulls back.
"Go find your dad. I'll look for everyone else." She promises.
She leans forward placing a small peck on my cheek before disappearing into the smoke.