Chapter Twenty-One - Escape Me.

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Xavier POV.

The world was duller without her in it. I'd held true love in my grasp and like a fool I'd let it go. Nothing made sense to me anymore.

The last time I'd spoken to her a month ago, she'd told me she didn't think I was the kind of person who cared what other people thought, I hadn't corrected her because I was ashamed.

The truth was that I cared too much what others thought. I wasn't cool calm and collected, I was a hot head and I had been since I could remember.

Our time had brought me clarity though. What she thought of me, far outweighed anyone else.

I'd picked up my phone to call her many times, sometimes getting as far as letting my finger hover dangerously over the call button. Every time I backed out, like a coward and shoved the phone back in my pocket.

DJ fed me updates about her progress and to be honest, without them, I probably would have continued to spiral down an abyss and become the abominable snowman Cris had said I was being a month ago.

She was doing well he'd said, and had laid down almost any entire album with songs she'd written herself.

We we're due a free week after our next show, and as a group we'd decided to fly back to LA as a surprise to everyone bar Jace. Cris and Jace spoke on the phone almost constantly when we weren't working. I'd spoken with Jay about taking on a secondary drummer. He liked to front up on stage and play bass or guitar. But was glued to the drums. I'd seen Jace play, he was good, better than good. With experience he'd probably outclass Jay.

The only issue was me. I was stopping a collaboration. There was no way in hell Nick would allow his minor son on tour with me being in the same bus. I had no doubts he'd be more than fine about his sons sexuality. Nick wasn't the kind of guy who judged someone on that. He was the kind of guy who judged people on their merits... and to him, I had none.

Still. Jay wanted to put it to them. Cris had said himself, that Jay was feeling down and out about school. All he'd ever wanted was to play music. He didn't care how.

So our trip back to LA was for many reasons and painfully not one of them related to me seeing Scarlett.

**

"Last show for a week." Jay shouted over the sound of the crowd, the crowd that was starting to sound a little angry. The openers were late and it showed. "I don't know about you guys, but I look forward to the rest."

"Where's the opening band?" I muttered. "The crowd is getting restless."

"I don't know, They should be on." Cris added looking around the backstage.

A stage manager ran up and shrugged. "They've gone."

"Gone?!" the four of us said in unison.
"Apparently the label pulled them like 10 minutes ago. Thatcher was cracked up on something and had a breakdown. The bands been pulled from the remainder of the tour. DJ's called and is working on a replacement. You guys need to head on now!"

I looked at the guys and shrugged. There wasn't anything we could do about it now.

"You heard the man, lets be the opening band for our own show." Doc laughed.

"Okay, okay. Lets play our old opening set list," I laughed "It's about time we cracked those songs out of the vault."

Jay laughed and pat me on the back. "Smith, I like your thinking."

We walked out on to the stage and the crowd went nuts. Just like they always did. I looked down at the front row and imagined she was there watching me. Just like I always did. I picked up my guitar and slung the strap over my shoulder, then wrapped my fingers around the base of the microphone.

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