The Inside Scoop (Kacchako Fanfic)

Spilling The Tea

"Welcome everyone to 67.5 radio, I'm Takeshi Shinju and  it's now 10:00A.M. You're right on time for quite possibly the hottest talk of the year: Uravity and Ground Zero, The Inside Scoop. How are you two love birds today?"

Terrible. Why you ask because I'm stinking stuck here while Mr. Red "Riot For Brains" steals my thunder out there. I can only imagine you idiots have a bunch of questions. Who the heck is Ground Zero? What happened to the students of class 1-A? Why is this guy with Deku's ship? Why am I breaking the fourth wall?

Well, because you're all so confused, I guess I'll answer your damn questions. For starters, if you're reading this right now, you are probably familiar with me. I mean, I am the best character after all. My real name is Katsuki Bakugo, but my hero name is Ground Zero as you've already heard.

WHAT? No! I don't look like that! Stop describing me as the angry hedgehog guy! I'm much cuter than a damn hedgehog

Pfft, disrespectful fans. Not that you guys actually deserve it or anything, but I'm going to get back to answering all you clueless idiots.

Ahem: listen to the stinking interview. I didn't show up for no stinking reason.

Let's get this crap fest over with.

"I'm doing great! Thanks for asking," Ochako smiles at the host before asking, "How are you?"

I have to use every ounce of self control not to roll my eyes as the blue-haired jacka- I mean, idiot, chuckles flirtatiously at my wife.

What do you mean "WIFE?!"? Yes, Ochako Bakugo is my wife damnit. Why do you sound so freaking surprised? I got married young, now shut up and listen so you can get your damn answers! You're all starting to piss me off!

I look and see that radio host's eyes wandering down Ochako's body ever so slowly. As if to make my claim, I snatch her by her waist and pull her on my lap. Whoa, my wife needs to pay attention to what she's eating, she's getting a little heavy.

She blushes wildly, tucking strands of auburn hair behind her cute ears.

"Katsuki! What are you doing? We're in public!" She yells.

I give myself a good ol' face-palm as Blue-haired Pervert laughs wildly.

"Wow, this whole interview has just gotten a whole lot more...exclusive." He chuckles. The guy sounds like a damn villain. I wonder if I'd get penalized for beating the sh- I mean crap outta him?

Meanwhile my spouse is out of the loop.

"What's wrong with you guys?" She asks, completely oblivious.

I sigh in frustration.

"Babe, you insinuated to all of Japan that we're engaging in explicit activity." I reply with an edge of annoyance in my voice.

I feel Ochako tense as she realizes what she said. Her face is now beet red. I would be laughing my butt off at her grade school-like reaction if I wasn't so angry. When did this thing end?

"Well, we better get a move on, we only have an hour left." The hosts says.

AN HOUR?! GEEZ, JUST KILL ME NOW BEFORE I  BLOW UP THIS STUDIO!!!

I clench my fists, trying to relive my irritation. It's not working.

"So, the first thing I'd like to ask you, is how you two became an item. Rumor has it that the global hero Deku had his eyes on Uravity at the beginning of high school. So Ground Zero, care to explain how you ended up with this woman as your wife?" He inquires, raising an eyebrow.