Fearless (Bellamy Blake - Book 1)

Chapter 66

I bite my tongue, Bellamy and Clarke have organised all of that, but he already knows it.

"I know sure as hell it isn't you that's in charge of those delinquents out there." He spits out at me, "It's that boy, and that privileged girl. You're just on the sideline, waiting for your orders just like everyone else out there. They are the real leaders here."

I shake my head at him, "That isn't true."

"Isn't it? Tell me this, when did everything change?"

I furrow my brow at him.

"It changed during your moment of weakness, when you told that boy what you did, when you told him that you murdered me in cold blood."

The colour drains from my face. He's right.

Ever since I told Bellamy about what I did, I haven't been as involved around camp. At first I was terrified, but then Bellamy told me that he shot Jaha, and I thought we could work through it together. But then Jaha lived, and Bellamy wasn't a murderer anymore.

"But I'm not the only innocent life you've taken, am I, Christine?"

"You were not innocent." I spit out, my teeth grit together. "You terrified me, you verbally abused mom all the time. You deserved to die."

"Maybe I did." He nods, "But did that boy deserve to die? The one in the woods, what was his name..."

"Atom." I whisper, my confidence suddenly gone as I slump, feeling a heavy height upon me.

"Atom." He nods. "You killed him. You were so pathetic that day, he helped you to safety and in return you stuck your knife into his throat and let him bleed out in front of you."

I shake my head, unable to form words at the memory, Atom's blistered and bloody face emerging into my head, his foggy eyes staring at me as he begged me to kill him.

"And then there was that other boy, and the girl."

An invisible blow hits my chest, knocking the air out of me.

Wells. Charlotte.

"You fashioned that innocent little girl into a murderer. You made her like you."

I shake my head as Charlotte's terrified face comes to mind, the image of her standing on the cliff edge breaking my heart all over again.

"I tried to stop her."

"No, your actions encouraged her to become you. You caused her to become a murderer, you caused her to DIE."

"No!" I yell, "I didn't mean to! I tried to stop her, I tried to tell her..." My voice cracks, the words coming out strained. "I tried..."

"She wanted to be like you so much. She idolised you."

"Stop." I beg as a tear rolls down my cheek, my words whispers, "Just stop."

"And then, as if murdering four innocents wasn't enough, you caused three hundred and twenty people to die, your people. All because of your own selfish wants."