Ozone // CLINTON AND CHRISTIAN

19: Heaven and Back

Clinton's POV

It's been almost 24 hours since everything happened. I haven't gotten any sleep; I keep getting flashbacks. Most of all, I can't stop thinking of the last words I said to (Y/n).

"I don't love you. I'm getting back with Angeline."

In the moment, I didn't mean it. But now – I can't stop thinking about Angeline. We had bad times, but I did love her at one time. Maybe she did really care about me.

I don't even know if I'm thinking straight right now. No sleep, nothing to eat, just alcohol. Fuck, my head hurts.

I pick up another bottle and slump into the couch of a new Air BnB. No more shows this tour. It's a blessing and a curse given this situation. The house is empty. I know exactly where everyone is, and I don't know why I'm not with them.

Christian is in the hospital and hasn't woken up. I don't know much; the boys haven't spoken to me. I feel awful. I fucked up – again. I want to go see him, but I can't bring myself to do it. I don't know if this is something that will blow over this time.

Your POV

You're sitting in the chair next to Christians hospital bed, staring at his seemingly lifeless body. The room is silent except for the beeping of the machines that are hooked up to him.

You keep your eyes fixed on Christian's hospital bed. Battered, but barely alive. The doctors haven't said much about how he is doing. As far as you know, he is in a coma. "Coma due to massive blood loss," they said. "Unknown if he will make a full recovery."

You can't stop thinking about how this is your fault. Everything has been your fault. Clinton almost overdosing in the bathroom, now this. If you had never met the boys and fallen in love with Clinton, Angeline wouldn't have shown up and caused this mess, and Christian would be perfectly fine.

You clench your hand into a fist, but slowly release as you hear the door open behind you. You stand up, expecting it to be the doctors with an update on Christian's condition. But you sigh as you see Mitchel, Jesse, and Pat walk in.

Mitchel walks over to you and gives you a tight hug. He smells of cheap cigarettes and booze, something you recognize when he is stressed.

"How are you holding up? Did you get any sleep last night?" he asks as he sits you down.

You shake your head 'no' and pull a blanket over your lap. You spent the whole night at the hospital with Christian, hoping he would wake up.

Jesse pulls up a chair next to you, holding a bag of fast food.

"We brought you food. You need to eat, (Y/n)."

You take a burger out of the bag and reluctantly eat, but you can't stop thinking about the man laying in front of you. You feel guilty for eating when he is suffering. You set the food down and look at the boys.

"So, what the hell is going on? Did the cops get back to you?" you ask, getting more angry than sad.

Mitchel shakes his head.

"Not with anything useful. You know, she got away. We called the cops and she was gone-"

You stand up and run your hands through your hair.

"So what?! We can press charges or... There has to be something we can do!"

Mitchel cuts you off and takes your hand.

"There's nothing you can prove in court. She fled. I want to as much as you do but-" He sighs. "She's gone."

Pat gives Mitchel a look, and the boys stand up. He rubs your back and kisses your head.

"I'll give you some time alone. Do you want to meet us back at the place?"

You nod and hear the door close behind you.

You want to scream, cry, do something to make her pay. Feeling powerless is one of the worst feelings, and it's all you feel right now. You feel powerless about helping Christian, powerless about getting revenge. There's nothing you can do.

You look over at Christian. There's no movement coming from his body.

"Don't you dare leave me. I need you here."

----------

You walk up to your new room at the Air BnB. Your bags with your clothes are on the floor, but you are too tired to get changed. You collapse into the bed and fall asleep.

----------

You wake up the next day to a breeze blowing through the window and warm sunlight on your face. You flip over to cover your face, but the door creaks open slowly. Clinton stands in the doorway, one hand on the doorknob, the other hand in the pocket his hoodie.

He looks at you as sadness clouds his eyes. "Can we talk?"

You get up and put shorts on. You refuse to look him in the eyes.

"We aren't having this conversation."

You try to walk out, but Clinton grabs your wrist.

"Yes, we are," he says.

You flinch away from him, but reluctantly walk away from the door. You stare into Clinton's eyes, struggling to piece together your thoughts.

You finally mumble, "You don't understand the gravity of what you did, do you?"

He stares at the ground in front of him, his hands fumbling in his pocket. You wait for an answer but there is none.

You walk towards him and put a finger towards his chest, looking him dead in the eyes.

"If you need a little help, let me clear it up for you," you shout.

"I started falling in love with you a long time ago, and you knew that. But then you turned around and kissed my best friend at the night club. Instead of fixing things with the boys and I, you took it out on yourself when we had to go searching for you. That was the first time you broke my trust."

His eyes well up with tears and his mouth opens as if he's about to say something, but nothing comes out.

You continue, "After that, I gave you another chance. I thought things would be perfect with us. But you never told me that you had a crazy ex-girlfriend. And apparently, you knew she was in town this whole time. Look where we are now! Christian is in the hospital and everything is fucked!"

You realize you are right in Clinton's face, shaking and crying. You take a step back and take a deep breath.

"All I'm trying to say is, I'm trying really hard not to blame you for this. It all could've been avoided. I don't know if you can ever regain my trust, Clinton."

You look at Clinton. You don't see the beautiful, sweet boy with the dark, dreamy eyes anymore. All you see is another guy you can't trust, selfish and a liar.

"(Y/n), I do love you..." he pleads.

"But you don't, Clinton."

It doesn't matter now. It's all lies.

You push Clinton out of the way and walk towards your suitcase laying on the floor. You unzip the side compartment to grab your toothbrush to get ready when you hear a noise.

You look up and see Mitchel standing in the doorway of your room, out of breath. He looks at you and Clinton confused, but quickly says,

"Christian's awake."