when i got off the stage, everyone was backstage greeting me. they all swarmed me with hugs & congratulations.
"you did so amazing!" jungkook smiled, it was his turn to hug me. after he pulled away from the embrace, he kissed me.
in front of everyone.
most knew the way we felt about each other, but this...? i'm not sure. i've never felt this feeling before. it's like i want to spend every dying second with him.
i pulled away after about two seconds, the backstage was loud but the silence between my friends grew larger and larger.
i chose to ignore it and began to hug jimin. his tight embrace and faint cologne made me feel safe. "you did so good!" he exclaimed, breaking the silence.
"can we go home?" i asked lightly, rubbing my eyes and stumbling a little. namjoon wrapped his arms around my shoulders to keep me upright. i rubbed my eyes and leaned into the mans warm arms. "of course lovely, let's go."
-
i did not want to celebrate, everyone else did though. that was okay, i told them to have fun without me and that i needed to sleep.
alana decided to sleep in yoongi's bed, probably for the better according to the previous nights events.
as soon as we got back to the hotel, i felt like i couldn't walk. i had been laying on namjoon's lap and refused to get up. he picked me up like a baby, my legs around his torso and arms around his neck as my head buried into his shoulder. i faded in and out but distinctively remember being laid on my bed and tucked in. whoever it was removed my shoes and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead.
"rest up~"
-
jungkooks pov
-
namjoon insisted on tucking kelsie in. i offered, but he denied, stripping me of any chance to comfort her.
i've never felt like this about someone before. i've never "fallen in love". i don't know why i feel this way.
namjoon closed the bedroom door lightly and joined us all in the living room.
"jungkook can i talk to you for a second?" he asked me, pointing towards the other shared suite. i nodded and followed him to where our conversation couldn't be heard.
"why'd you kiss kelsie?"
my face dropped, i didn't know how to respond..
"i think have feelings for her, joon."
he looked...angry.
"that's unprofessional, jungkook. we are here to make an album with her."
"namjoon, it's not like we're dating or anything!"
"i don't care!"
we began to bicker. i don't know why he was being like this!
"why are you being like this?!" his brows were furrowed and his eyes were burning into the ground.
"none of your fucking business jungkook! i'm looking out for you, for your career! i refuse to let you throw it away."
"damn namjoon, didn't know you felt that way."
-
kelsies pov
-
i was thirsty and hot. i got up and walked to the living room where my best friend and five of the boys sat.
"where is my hydroflask, lan?" i asked her from the opposite side of the room.
all six of them turned around and looked at me.
"oh hey! uhm i think namjoon brought it in. it's in the other suite."
i nodded and walked to the door. i could hear slight raised voices coming from the opposite side of it.
"that's unprofessional, jungkook. we are here to make an album with her."
"namjoon, it's not like we're dating or anything!"
"i don't care!"
"why are you being like this?!"
"none of your fucking business jungkook! i'm looking out for you, for your career! i refuse to let you throw it away."
my heart hurt. i didn't know he felt such hatred towards me. we were writing partners? i guess i was too quick to judge. i decided to open the door.
"damn namjoon, didn't know you felt that way."
him and jungkooks heads shot to face me.
"kelsie, i-."
"yeah i don't have time for the excuses. i'm just trying to make an album." namjoons head looked at the ground. i spotted my blue hydroflask in the corner and grabbed it.
"think about the people you put in your boat. make sure they're all rowing and not drilling holes while you're not looking. isn't that what you said namjoon?" i said quite loud before slamming the door shut.
my feelings were hurt. my insides felt like they were flipping.
"everything good?" hoseok asked as i walked back in the room.
"ask them."
-
"KELSIE!!! WAKE UP!!!" there was an immense jumping on my bed from my tiny ass best friend.
"alana. i will kill you." i murmured, not even opening my eyes.
"kelsie it's 2:30 in the afternoon. you have to leave in two hours. i just assumed you'd want to eat and hang out with us."
"don't fuck with me alana there's no way i slept until 2:30. leave me alone."
"whatever. don't be pissed when i wake you up and you're not ready.
when alana wants me up she wants me UP. i didn't believe her, there was no possible way i slept until 2:30. i kept my eyes shut and let myself fall back into a heavy sleep.
-
"kelsie. wake up dude. you've gotta leave in 10. call an uber." alana bugged me, again. it felt like only five minutes had passed since the previous time she disrupted me.
"alana. please stop. i have a concert later i need to rest." i aggressively asked her with my eyes closed.
"no shit, dumbfuck. i'm trying to wake you up. it's 4:18 and you still arent awake."
"no way." i opened my eyes and rolled over to my phone. the lock screen flashed and it indeed was 4:18.
"FUCK!" i shot up and ran to my suitcase. i grabbed some sweats and one of taes puma hoodies i snatched from him. i threw them on while attempting to call two separate ubers.
"what are you doing?" alana asked me, standing up from my bed. "i already called the ubers, i'm not cruel. hurry your ass up."
i managed to put a black mask that hobi got me and some circle glasses on. i whipped open my bedroom door and then it hit me.
jungkook and namjoon.
whatever, i don't have time.
everyone was sitting in the living room. namjoon and kook were on complete opposite sides of the couch. they all seemed annoyed today.
i sighed, yoongi furrowed his eyebrows at my stressed look. he shot up and wrapped an arm around my shoulder.
"it doesn't matter, hey, it. doesn't. matter. your fans matter. they're all that matters. let's go." he poured his supportive words into my ear. he said it quiet enough that it wouldn't fill the room but loud enough for everyone to hear.
with his arm still wrapped around me, we both walked to the uber as the rest trailed behind. namjoon, jin, taehyung, and hoseok went in one car while me, alana, yoongi, jungkook, and jimin went in another. i kept my head facing out the window. they all made conversation with themselves except for me. yoongi tried to include me in the conversation but i just brushed it off. i was thinking, overthinking actually.
we all piled into the backstage. they all went separate without even a word from each other. they seemed so upset at one another. was it my fault? did i do something? i thought i was in the right?
-
it was 6:55, i had to get set up to go on stage. it was five minutes before showtime. everyone stood in a line as they watched the mic pack being put on me. it was an awkward silence. the looks on their faces represented guilt and sorrow, like they wanted to say something but couldn't get the words out.
"you ready?" one of the production assistants asked me. i was about to be put on stage in front of tens of thousands of people, i was not ready.
my eyes looked back at the eight people silently standing behind me. they all looked at the ground, other than yoongi and alana. they had the saddest expressions on their face. almost as though they felt sympathy. but for what?! i didn't do anything!
as i was getting onto the lift to bring me up onto he stage, i took one final look at my best friends. i felt like i could cry. they were all looking at me. i just shook my head and faced forward.
"we love you!" jimin shouted desperately. he didn't care about how the others felt.
"we do!" taehyung called out too.
i didn't even move my glance. i felt like i could cry. i just faced forward.
-
about two songs in my demeanor changed a whole lot. i went from sad to fucking pumped. why would i let their gloominess ruin my fucking day? people were cheering my name. i was so pissed that i let them. as i was performing, my eyes glanced over to the faint glowing blue box at the top of the stadium. there they sat. i sang my next song just for them. how angry they made me. i released all my anger into it. jumping to the beat, interacting with the crowd, all of it. it was surreal.
during the first onstage break, i began talking to my fans.
"metlife how you feeling tONIGHT?" i pointed my mic to them, screams and cheers echoed through the stadium. i chuckled as i pointed the mic back to myself. "it's crazy. it feels like just yesterday i was growing up 30 minutes from here. now i'm here."
-
the last song, the last song got me. i began to cry. cry so hard. i was still singing, but i was crying. i was overwhelmed. i pointed my mic towards the beautiful crowd as they sang my song. i was so happy and so sad at the same time. it became too much. i just began to cry and let them take over the song. i was losing my shit on stage.
-
yoongi's pov
-
we all watched. we watched as she began to cry. my heart began to pound out of my chest. i wanted to go swallow her in hugs. i faced the boys, they looked as though their hearts were broken. kelsie began to sob more and more.
"i cant to this i have to go comfort her." alana stood up and was about to leave the box but someone stopped her.
"i'm coming too."
it was jungkook.
"me too." i added, facing the boys. "you want to be dicks? fine. remember this when we go back to seoul and we have no other good friends. nobody to come back to la and depend on. she let us in her house! he h o m e. she wrote songs with you namjoon. songs! you guys are gonna let this go down the drain? alright, fine. i'm going now. come on." i nodded to jungkook and alana.
-
"METLIFE~." my voice was weak but it was loud. they were cheering for me, so loud. "I LOVE YOU! NEVER FORGET THAT! BE HAPPY, EVEN ON YOUR WORST DAYS. MAKE SURE TO KEEP A SMILE ON YOUR BEAUTIFUL FUCKING FACES BECAUSE I LOVE YOU! YOU BELONG TO ME, KELSIE MAY! I LOVE YOU! GOODNIGHT." i bowed as they cheered. i was still crying but i blew kisses into the crowd as i walked onto the platform. the lift slowly brought me down to backstage.
i wiped the tears off my face as i was lowered down. i turned my head and they all were there. all of them. their faces begged for forgiveness.
i slowly walked over to them.
they engulfed me in their arms.
"we love you.".
YOU ARE READING
80 worlds apart. | j. jungkook {completed}
Fanfiction"namjoon-hyung, kelsie is really pretty." "jungkook ah~ you cant say that!"
