Under the Moonlight

To be his wife

Deevanna's POV

Napabuntong hininga na lang ako nang muling lumapat ang unang tapak ko sa bansang aking unang kinamulatan. I've been away for too long yet this place hadn't even changed one half of what I had expected it to progress, given that I had just expected a bit out of it. After 13 years, 7 months, and 4 days; I am here in this land again, the beloved land that gave me wonderful memories and abhored experience.

"Welcome home Doc.." I looked indefferently at my dear cousin, Eivinn, when he greeted me.

It just feels so weird that I became close with him. And now, I feel like so far away from him yet I am still holding a bit of him at the tip.

"What's with the formal address? It feels like you're not acknowledging me as your cousin, but rather a companion in our field." I rolled my eyes at him as he laughed, the tension that was built by distance and time went crumbling down slowly. And yes, he's also a doctor himself.

"Welcome home Van. We missed you.." he went on as I let him hug me.

It feels so warm, and just by being in his arms, makes me want to cry all the tears that was pushed away from those years of suffering. All the tears that I denied of acknowledging. All the tears that was caused by pain, by them. I was so naive back then, an easy target, so I had to pretend to be strong. To not know any weaknesses. Now that I felt the security in my cousin's hug, which I always wanted to have, I wanted to let it all out. Those untold pain. But no, I should contain myself without one's connection. So I broke the hug short.

"Oh. Don't you dare sugarcoat that. I can take that you missed me but we? That's absurd!" They don't even care... I wanted to add but I held back. In a way, they won't understand.

"Oh come on, Van. They care but they just won't show." I almost gave him a mocking smile but again I held back.

"Vin, did I say they don't? Not a thing. But let's cut that short, I'm tired.." I said, turning a bit indifferently than I had been a while ago.

I know that I'm lying, but who cares. I just kind of don't want to talk about it a thing. I'm still scared to give myself away. Cause every time that I do, people whom I gave myself away with tend to leave me, making me feel rejected all the time. And I don't think I can still take one more rejection after receiving tons of it.

As I directed my gaze back to him after looking away to calm my surging breakdown in mind, I caught him shaking his head in disappointment, as if saying 'I knew that you're thinking of it in a way but you're just scared to admit it'. I scoffed at him and I immediately earned his smirk which was why I am so pissed now.

"Let's just go Vin, let the freaking topic go." I bit my lower lip in an attempt to shush myself from saying any harsh words. I'm a devil myself in a silent state, what more if I let control slide my grasp?

"Very well then. Get in and let me drive you home.." He opened me the car's door which leads to the seat next to the driver's seat with an amused smirk plastered across his face. In that moment, I wanted to forget that he's my cousin and just rip that smirk out of his face, literally!

He cocked his head sideways when he noticed that I didn't oblige, still having that fvckin' annoying smirk with him. I sighed in a problematic way closing my eyes firmly. He better not piss me off further and try to get on my nerves or he'll live his life permanently in my super-hated list and hell will break loose I swear!

"What?" I furrowed my brows as I look at him. He eyed me closely.

"Aren't you gonna get in?" He ask in a bit of confusement and I knew better! He's faking it!