Chapter Seventeen

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"I promise." It might have been an empty promise but it was worth making. Looking at the way his features relaxed and how his little wrinkles smoothed away was the best prize in this world. I've never seen his eyes shine in the way they did right now.

"Okay, let's go somewhere better." Niklaus propositioned. He took ahold my hand and directed me towards Derek's car. Seeing the faint red tint of the old car made me relive the very recent events that brought me to this specific place.

"I killed Bonnie." I spat out. Saying it out loud seemed to make me realize everything that was happening was very real. My sister took her last breath on the pavement and I was the one who deprived her from a long happy life. And the heavy air that was starting to be created around ya made me realize that I just ruined the whole atmosphere that was created between us.

"I killed her." Niklaus stopped in his tracks. He turned around and gently touched my face, wiping away the tears I didn't know I had shed. His thumb glided on my cheek bones like a wind shield wiping away the rivers of salty nightmares.

"I'm sure it was due to self defense." Seeing how my tears didn't stop or that my expression was the exact same Niklaus continued talking. "How can I help?" I could see that he was hurt by everything that was happening. He didn't know what to do but he wanted to help.

"I want you to turn me." I didn't take my gaze away from his eyes. I did feel empty. I was a shell of myself. Turning into a vampire seemed fair. An eternal torture. It was very egoistic and a very masochistic move, not gonna lie.

"There is no way I'm gonna do that." He turned around and started dragging me to the car. He was not having my attitude but right now I wasn't having his.

"I know we had something before I died. I can't understand what it was. I want to remember!" I screamed at him. Quite selfish of me if you ask me. To be honest, I didn't care anymore. It's time to think about myself. I've read on the diary that vampires have the ability to turn off their emotions. Like a switch and it was pretty tempting right now. So maybe it wasn't a matter of eternal torture but a way to get rid of everything.

"Are you willing to feel every little emotion ten times more intensively?! I don't think so!" He shouted at me. Looking away he took a deep breath. It seemed like controlling his anger was a huge issue for him but somehow he was coping with the whole thing very nicely. A few seconds passed and he opened the door to my side. I sighed and entered into the car kinda defeated. But then, I had the best idea in my mind. I only had to execute it perfectly. I just need to use the best manipulative skills I could master. I've never manipulated anybody but there's always first times.

Quickly, I grabbed the red stained dagger from the driver's sit. Niklaus did notice the quick movement and in seconds was sitting next to me in the old car. Unfortunately, for him, he was late. I had already pressed the dagger on my neck.

The final step was just to let my feelings in. Everything I put in the back of my head flew in front of my eyes in slow motion. Every little painful moment in my life was again presented to me. As much as I hated to look vulnerable I had no choice but to let the tears flow like rivers down my cheeks.

"I cannot live like this. The guilt is too great." With a smooth movement I ran the dagger on my neck letting the blood flow.

"No!" Niklaus, immediately, bit into his wrist and placed it on my mouth. I felt the blood rushing down my throat. Its metallic taste made me gag but it did its job. The cut on my neck healed completely and I could breath again.

Niklaus took me into his arms. He caged me with his strong embrace. I felt bad to proceed with my plan right now. It was too cruel for me to do. I wouldn't do it now but I swear I would find a chance to. I let the dagger roll of my hand and allowed it to touch the ground.

Pulling away from his embrace, I placed my hands on his cheeks. I let my thumb run onto his cheek bone. He was surprised by my actions. Then I pressed my lips on his. He didn't move for a whole second before starting to join into the passionate dance our lips were performing.

This felt right and I didn't regret doing it one bit. I felt like I finally was complete.



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