My (Many) Problems

I wonder

I come to most of the week, the one day I'm absent you just so happen to come, are you avoiding me? I would love to see you, to talk to you, for you to explain yourself, no one talks behind your back just Ethan talking about how your going to fail again, when he tells others they say they aren't surprised, why not at least try and make them, I don't hate you, I'm just waiting for you to explain yourself and maybe for me to speak my mind so you know what I feel you have done wrong, what you need to change for you to be able to talk to that one guy you wanted to.

 you tell me not everything's about me, its not, we are just flies in the universe, but am I not allowed to complain when I feel your stepping out of line, it's not my fault that when I ask you to stop touching me you still do it anyway, and you wonder why I avoided you. it's true the world isn't about be, but then why do you act like its about you? you try to get attention from anyone, you may not know that your doing it but you really are, you say that the girl with the S name is a attention whore, but without knowing it you are two. 

you say that I'm wrong and that your not as crazy as I write about but if you say that you want to hang a guy that has a crush on me you wonder why I think about you in that way, I call a anime art hot and you thought I was talking about a real person and said you were going to kill them for a second, and you wonder why I don't talk to you about my personal problems. when I talk about good cosplayers, or hot cosplayers you get quiet and section yourself off. don't call me greedy or selfish because that's something I already know, it's like calling an anorexic person fat, like calling a person who is suffering from many mental disorder (doctor assigned) retaterd.  

some of the reasons I keep my distance from you is because the things you say about me and others is toxic, you are a toxic person, and don't think it's just my point of view, don't think that everyone is toxic only you because the way you act around us and others. 

damn I wish I was here yesterday so I can tell you all of this to your face but looks like I was to late, was it a coincidence that the one day i'm not here you just so happen to be here and the next day your gone when I'm here? some think it's a coincidence, I did to for a bit until some others said that its weird that when I'm not here when your here and vise versa, but how could you know I wouldn't be here? I only told two people and one of them you "hate" and I can promise you, I never knew you were going to be here yesterday, because if I was there I would tell this all to  your face. it's possible that it is a coincidence, but that's one LARGE coincidence that is what made me make this chapter. I still wonder...

what will happen...?

will I be left alone? or will you avoid me till the end of time?

I wonder.......