Love Sucks

Love Sucks - 30

Happy Halloween to all you halloween-celebraters! If you went to a party or did some trick or treating, what did you go as? xD

On another note, I had plenty of time to write this past week because it's been half term. I go back to school tomorrow, so the wait is gonna be put back on. I decided to cut this chapter up though, so I've got something to start on next time. Sorry it's not all that amazing and it's unedited, but it's nearly midnight here and I'm soo tired. Anyway, enough of me.

Hope ya like it?

~

Chapter thirty;

Alex and I sat there, letting the cold winds brush across us, watching the day go by in silence for a long time. Words weren't enough to say all that we were thinking, I'm sure of it. A part of me was terrified, chilled to the bone as random thoughts of the events that would take place in fourteen days kept popping up into my head. Another part of me was floating on cloud nine so blissfully, high on the toxins of love. And in the back of my head, a dark shadow was lingering, gloomy as I thought of all I would have to endure between now and two weeks time. But with Alex by my side, I knew I'd be able to endure it with my head held high.

Every now and then, he'd squeeze my hand and kiss my forehead. It was times like that which really made me see just how much he made me stable; he was all I needed.

To love and to be loved, I had learned this day, was the best feeling around. To hear the words echo from Alex's (he of all people!) lips, those three words a part of me had been aching to hear him say since day one, I knew then, at that very moment that love really could make everything better. Perhaps it would even conquer all, just like many have said to me before.

If I was honest with you, I was not holding my breath on that one. And Alex could tell me he loved me ten times a minute for the next fourteen days, but when our time was up I knew there was a war to fight - and he would not fight it. Of course, in the mean time, I would sweeten the bitter wounds that scarred him. And in the end, he would be alright. I would personally make sure he was alright and out of harms way. He wanted to be human, and if he was going to stand with me until the end, he would never accomplish what he dreamed so bigly of. Meaning I couldn't allow him to stay with me all the way; he had to be human. I at least owed him that much, surely?

He deserved to love again. He deserved the chance to marry and have children, make a new family and unconditionally love others; he deserved a human life and all the joys, the ups and downs, the arguments and the beautiful moments we so easily took for granted. He deserved it all, for he had fought a war for over a century, ever since the vamperic venom first coursed through his veins. He had been young when he was turned - eighteen, nineteen? - and so the remainder of his human life would not go to waste. He had all those years to live out and love again; in time, I would willingly sink into the dark corners of his unconsciousness, unreachable by his memories. I would gratefully be forgotten; and although I might not survive, my love, I knew, would live on forever.

Because, as said before, it was not just about him and I. The power the Others were so greedily after, the powers I acquired to protect the vortex were clearly misplaced. I was the wrong person to have been made responsible for protecting such a valuable, yet dark, piece of the dimensions. Even with the weight of the vortex on my shoulders I was not powerful enough to protect myself or those around me, let alone a whole dimension.

So I would go quietly, subtly, not making a scene. I would not drag Alex down into the bottomless black hole of death I was obviously now damned to.

They say if you love someone, you have to let them go. That was me letting him go; I would find a way to get him away, to get him to safety, far away from me. But only when our time was thinning, for I knew that for the next fourteen nights I would long for his presence more than I ever had done before.