32: so close but not enough

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The feeling of wanting to cry was unbearable

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The feeling of wanting to cry was unbearable.

I couldn't look at Elias' face. I'm only now realizing just how much I couldn't stand him, he only brought me so much anger and sadness. It bottled up and it made me uncontrollable and emotional. He makes me overthink things to the extreme and distracts me from everything else I should be thinking about.

Leon and Olivia sat on the couch crossing their legs over the other while watching some weird guy on tv messing with poisonous animals. Olivia kept making disgusted faces everytime he would pick up a snake or pet a large scorpion. I turned to see Natalia rolling her eyes when Leon hugged Olivia closer to him when she got grossed out. She scoffed and turned to me, a smile appearing on her expression. I smiled gravely back, trying not to show my pain. Maybe she noticed and I sucked at hiding my emotions or I was just easy to read. After all, she was the only one to really notice Elias and me.

It was better me and Elias weren't riding on his private plane back home or else I would be crying. I needed distractions and Natalia was good for that. She always complained how the tv show was stupid and if it was so gross, they should just turn it to some Disney movie or something. I almost wondered what Disney was but I think I watched one film when I lived in a orphanage growing up. I didn't mind watching another, honestly. Natalia would have stayed in Belize but she didn't want to ride back crammed in a plane sitting by a smelly fat man.

Veda and Corbyn stayed behind of course to enjoy their honeymoon. I was almost jealous, I barley got to experience the natural beauty of Belize and it's jungles. I only got a glimpse of the clear blue water and sandy beaches but I'm also glad to be leaving as I deeply missed Evelyn. I wonder what she was doing now. Did she even have time alone when Elias was gone? Surely she had to have time off.

I'll just be happy to be off of this plane when I get to see Evelyn's sweet smile and face. She had become a mother figure to me, always giving me advice I didn't even know I needed. She would know how to mend my pain. I felt an intense glare on me. I turned my head to meet Johnathon's dark gaze. I swallowed nervously seeing his lips lift into a smirk. He was always looking at me, it felt like. Ever since I've first met him, I've felt off and haven't received good vibes from him. It was like he was always watching and waiting for the prowl. I try to stay away him as much as I can, knowing he could easily break me in half like a twig. Which I'm sure he was still thinking of doing ever since he threatened to kill me.

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