Bio for 2019 - 2023 (finished)

Pain Killer's/ Getting Hurt

I have been on really strong pain killer's because of my side, it still hurt's like hell most of the time ok nearly all the time so what happens when I'm on the painkiller's, I'm forgetful, I don't make sense, I get sleepy and drowsy ... what I found out the other day I can be bitchy, hurtful and just all around mean but today it was worse ... I made two meals today first one for the farmers and of course, my family's as well. 

So I finished cooking and was just sitting around and I got up and felt something hard and rough on my sleeve so I looked and it was burnt .... it must have cough fire at some point but I didn't notice. Good thing it didn't burn my arm as well or more.

I must be getting worse on my painkiller's, I hope my best friend reads this and see's that it wasn't my fault about what happened but yeah, I can't think right or anything I keep going weird stuff and not remembering it. What is happening to me? should I be worried ?? 

I can't put up with the pain it hurts too much..... my hot water bottle isn't keeping its heat so I need a new one which I will get on Monday and hopefully I won't need the painkillers as much 

Hopefully, that means I will go back to being myself. 

So my big sister hurt me and upset me last week, she had a go at me about not doing housework, how it's stressing my dad out and how I have to learn to get on with the pain ... 

I was so upset because the day I learn to live with it will be the day I give up trying to get better... I don't want to learn to deal with it I wanna get rid of it, I wanna get better and I sure as hell don't want to stay on the painkiller's if it's not making me act like myself. 

My sister doesn't know how much that hurt plus she isn't exactly perfect but doesn't see that.

Anyways If I act weird to anyone please forgive me it's the painkiller's but hopfully I will have day's when I'm not on them and will be myself.

                          ayeimbeau