Hero

The Terrible Plan

"This is a terrible idea," Simon told me. He, Rowan, and I were all currently in my room. I told them my plan for bringing down the Hansen twins and I needed Rowan's help to do this.  The plan was dangerous but it's the only plan I have.

"You've got a better one?" I asked slightly annoyed. I know he's just worried but him constantly telling me how stupid this plan is doesn't help. I've been stressing out about this so much that my little sleep I usually get is now nonexistent. I know I have to be in my best shape in order for this plan to work but stress makes my nightmares worse. Most people would take sleeping pills but I'm not most people. Even if the pills worked, I wouldn't trust myself with them. I rather not end up in the hospital getting my stomach pumped.

Worthless. I heard a deep voice whisper in the ear. I shook the voice out of my head. Stupid arse voices. They constantly nagged me and distracted me. This won't work. You are going to fail like you always do. A higher feminine voice said. I shook my head once more and slapped the back of my head.

Rowan looked away from my closet towards me. "You okay?" She looks at me slightly concerned. I want to tell her I'm fine but she knew me. Both of them knew me too well. My walls were slowly falling down and I felt defenceless. What's even worse than that is that with Charlie I had no walls. I've known her for a few months and she could see past everything. It scares me so much. What if she finds all my physical and emotional scars? She'd hate me. She would never speak to me again.

I nod my head 'yes' and she turns back o my closet. "Em, I just don't want you to get hurt. Nightshade is even scared of them!" Simon exclaimed. I moved closer to him on my bed and side hugged him. He doesn't really care a voice whispered. You are worthless. No one could love you. Mother's always right. You are a selfish unloveable bitch. "Emma!" Simon called shaking me. "You okay?"

"Uh- Yeah I'm just tired," I mumble.

"When's the last time you slept?" Rowan asked.

I shrugged, "I think I slept an hour last night? More or less at least." Both of them gave me a look like 'This bitch crazy'. "What? I am excellent at surviving on less than three hours of sleep."

"Alright, I'm calling Elijah!" Simon announces dramatically. I laugh when he almost trips on his own feet. He's going to call Elijah. Elijah has better things to do than worry about a worthless bitch like you. You are just ruining his life like you do everyone else's.

"Why?" I whine. "Elijah doesn't need to know. Who cares about my sleeping problems? I'm completely fine!" Simon just shakes his head and steps outside my bedroom assumingly to call Elijah. "Ugh!" I fall back on my bed. What a nice ceiling I have. Very white.

Rowan laughs at my exaggeration. "Whose Elijah?" Rowan asks.

"Elijah Lancaster. He's Simon and I's friend. I have no idea why Simon is calling him though. It's not like he can do anything," I mumble. Elijah can heal physical wounds but mental ones are different.

"Elijah is a smart dude. He can help using science," Simon explains taking his spot on my bed.

"You are just as smart!" I say throwing my hands in the air for dramatic effect. It's true. Simon is the top of our class, me coming in second place. Though he wasn't excellent at science, he made up for it in every other subject even art.

Simon and Rowan both laughed at my antics. God, they'd make such a cute couple. It hurts to think that but I know it's true. You'll never find someone who loves you. You are an annoying piece of shit. I walked over to my desk and pulled out a rubber band. I placed it on my wrist and started flicking it. Hoping the pain would distract me from the voices. I knew Simon disproved of this but I didn't care. It's better than drinking. Right? Right.